You've Been Chopped!

If there's a limit to how much irony can be contained in a single story, this one must come awfully close to hitting it. Dr Leanna Wen, new president of Planned Parenthood, became a victim of pro-choice women when the gals - members of the PP Board of Directors - "chose" to terminate her employment before she got to the one year mark. Or "reached full term," you might say.

Wen was not asked if she wanted to be excised from PP's governing body, but then - we're told that in similar situations, the unborn's opinion and rights don't matter. Hey, rules are rules, right Leanna?

But the irony doesn't stop there! It turns out that Dr. Wen was discarded like a bit of tissue because she was trying to make Planned Parenthood at least try to offer some of the non-abortion medical services which they claim accounts for 97% of Planned Parenthood's business (and is a blatant lie).

Unfortunately, the Board wanted the thrust of the president's job to be even more aggressive political advocacy for abortion, rather than fiddle-faddling around with needed services, clinic hygiene, and caring about the frequently impoverished women who rapidly pass through Planned Parenthood with their backs on a conveyor belt and their feet in stirrups.

Planned Parenthood really has only two functions: abortion and political activism. The only questions now are which is their primary function, and why in God's name they're still receiving federal funding.

WHIPPING HIS CAMPAIGN INTO SHAPE

We figured if we were going to make any Beto O'Rourke jokes, we'd better make them damn fast - because the polls indicate that he'll be nothing but an unpleasant campaign memory within the next week or two.

In part, this may be due to his odd ideas about what will appeal to voters. He's already done his best to convince everyone that he's Hispanic, despite being a full-blooded Irishman. And now he thinks that voters, and especially black voters, will like him better now that he's announced that members of his family (and his wife's) were slave owners. Those whippersnappers!

Beto feels this gives him a "special personal connection" to those who suffer from the effects of slavery, in much the way Adolph Hitler had a "special personal connection" to the millions who suffered from the effects of his death camps.

To make up for his family's dark deeds (as slave ownership documents were called), Beto is now pushing hard for reparations. But rather than taxpayer funds taken from the vast majority of people whose ancestors did not own slaves, we suggest "in kind" reparations from folks like Beto with proven guilt. He should volunteer his labors, free of charge, to black Americans for the rest of his life.

And, when his chores are done, he should make his masters refreshing mint juleps, then sing and dance to a medley of Stephen Foster songs. Put another way, if he wants to go back 200 years, then by all means he should.

UP, UP, AND AWAY!

We are delighted to share the news that Jim Hlavac's fundraising effort was a huge success, with significant credit owed to the kind-hearted people who hang out here at Stilton's Place. 

As we're writing this, Mr. Hlavac has garnered $1,645 of his $1,000 goal for his travels (which begin, we believe, on Sunday). But he also got more than that out of this experience, and we can't possibly put it than he did...

Fly safely, Mr. H, and sincere best wishes that you'll find the medical treatment and support you need in New York City. Keep us all posted!