Wednesday, November 17, 2021

Going To Health in a Handbasket

stilton’s place, stilton, political, humor, conservative, cartoons, jokes, hope n’ change, health, leukemia, ovarian cyst, Kathy, cancer, Karma, Penny

It has recently become clear why there's no idiom in the English language (or any other) which celebrates "The Luck of the Jarlsbergs." Because frankly, we're not seeing much of it lately.

In the past several months, my beloved dog died, my wife was given 2 weeks to live, I discovered that my teeth are rotting in my head and need $10,000 worth of repair, my best friend was diagnosed with prostate cancer, and now I'm about to become the grandparent to an Alien Baby. Alien as in "the kind from space," rather than "the kind that speaks Spanish and is going to get $450,000 just for breaking into our country."

To tell the story quickly, which is all that I have strength for, on the one frigging day last week that Kathy and I didn't need to go to the hospital, daughter Jarlsberg started having severe abdominal pains. We hurried off to CareNow where a doctor palpated her lower abdomen and scored a 10 out of 10 on the pain scale. It was amazing: bells rang, lights flashed, confetti dropped from the ceiling, and a small gallery of onlookers eating fair food cheered. For her high score, Daughter J was instructed to take any prize from the top shelf - although all the prizes were the same: an order to go immediately to the Emergency Room.

Once there, Daughter J was given an IV drip of Clan MacMorphine and hustled off for a CT scan to determine if her searing pain was appendicitis or diverticulitis. But it was neither. The doctor said they'd found a "very big tumor" which was "probably an ovarian cyst." I asked the doctor to convey the approximate size of the growth using the citrus fruit scale, but he had an entirely different part of the produce aisle in mind: "about the size of a watermelon." No, really.

Daughter J has a medical condition in which ovarian cysts aren't uncommon, but whoppers like this one are something else entirely. The good news is that such tumors are almost always benign, and they can be surgically removed unless you're covered by a Blue Cross Blue Shield HMO plan. Thanks, Obama!

Being her father's daughter, the delightful Ms. J is referring to the abdominal visitor as her "alien baby" and she's trying to figure out how to milk a few baby shower gifts out of the whole affair. We hope that the surgery can happen soon, and that she'll have a quick and uneventful recovery (usually about 6-8 weeks).

Meanwhile, Kathy is living with (and fighting) her leukemia every day. Today (Tuesday) was pretty typical: she woke up feeling not great but not horrible. Then continued to get weaker and weaker in the hours before an already-scheduled appointment at the oncology clinic. By the time we arrived, she was so weak she couldn't walk even using her walker and I had to borrow a wheelchair to transport her to the blood lab so they could take samples and see what she was low on.

Everything, it turned out.

See, chemo destroys your body's ability to produce all of the swell things that make blood so useful for tasks like, oh, sustaining life. Your system comes back online slowly, but until then you're utterly dependent on blood and platelet transfusions every few days. So today she got platelets and two units of blood (about a 6 hour procedure), but that will hold her until her next visit...on Thursday. And beyond that, we really don't know just now. Maybe we'll find out more on Thursday, or maybe we won't. The only thing we can count on is that Amazon Prime will soon be delivering the wheelchair I ordered today.

And that's really all I have the strength and brain power to share just now, but so many of you are being so supportive that I want to keep you in the loop. As always, your good wishes, positive thoughts, and prayers are all vastly and sincerely appreciated.

And if you happen to have any spare baby clothes roughly the size of a watermelon, well...

BONUS: KARMA KICKS KARTOONIST

It was 2013! How could I have known...?

81 comments:

  1. Some people just can't play second fiddle, can they? Glad they found it (albeit the hard way). She should ship whatever they take out of her, to oJoe Biden. It's about the only thing he's "built back" this year!
    Hope her surgery and recovery goes well.

    I'd say, so your household can return to normal, but you seem to redefine "normal" every week!
    God bless you and yours!

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  2. Holy cow, bless your household, and may the Clan MacGregor flow freely.

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  3. Oh man stilt, this is just too much to handle on your own. So thankful you’ve reached out. Stay strong, stay sane. {{Hugs}} to all, and prayers aplenty of course. Prayer warriors are here to help.

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  4. Gee Stilton, I'm truly sorry for all the suffering in your household of late, and I pray both Kathy and Daughter J come through it all soon and with a long period of wonderful health and love on the other side.

    At the same time, you're all making me feel the issues I have at the moment aren't all that bad. I probably shouldn't have laughed, but I did and feel a little better for it, so thanks.

    God Bless you all.

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  5. Your ability to maintain your sense of humor is inspiring. Your poor family's trials put my issues in the proper perspective. You and yours, especially Kathy and now Daughter J, are in our prayers.

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  6. Oy vey!! Here's hoping that 2022 is better than 2021 appears to have been... Prayers for your family headed your way...
    God bless.

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  7. @Stilt, your comic from 2013 is almost as bad as the satire from the Babylon Bee that keeps turning into reality. I know it's not the only prescient cartoon you've posted. Are you and the Bee psychic or something??

    I won't pray because things usually turn out badly when I do but I certainly HOPE things all turn out well for the wife and daughter.

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  8. I hope and pray things start working for the better for your family. It will be so nice to read that things are boringly normal at your house.
    In the meantime, stay strong and know that we all are there for you,
    jack

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  9. Stilton, praying for your family and your super power; your sense of humor, to carry you through whatever lies in wait for you.

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  10. TVAG, get that conga line started up again stat!

    Multitudes of prayers for the entire Clan Jarlsberg.

    JustaJeepGuy, I'm starting to suspect... Have you ever seen Stilt and the Bee together in the same room at the same time? Hmmm?

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  11. I've only come across this "unexpected event" once before. A business acquaintance of mine, one Alistair Steele, had a junior daughter who somehow or other hadn't got around to leaving home. One day, unbeknownst to all, she experienced a similar emergency and to the surprise of all delivered a healthy baby !
    Here's hoping that this is a sign of the renewal of life in your beleaguered household.

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  12. Yeesh, Stilt! Did your family piss off some voodoo witch doctor anytime recently? All the best (whatever it may be!) to you and yours!

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  13. Best wishes for you and your family!

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  14. Wow, are you sure you haven't fallen into one of the more maudlin Dickens' novels? (Who am I kidding? They're all more maudlin.) There's an old Chinese curse, "May you live in interesting times." I don't think you could stand for things to be more interesting. Stay strong and God bless ya!

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  15. Prayers ascending have been amended to include your daughter.

    Maybe she can get in the medical journals, then profit. There must be a paying market for that cyst, even outside of the sideshows.

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  16. Continued prayers for you and your family Stilton.

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  17. ...
    ...
    ...
    Does this mean that Johnny Optimism is gonna have a baby cyst-er?

    Keep laughing, Stilt. It's the only way to keep sane, nowadays.

    I can claim some expertise in the field, as the former owner and operator of a 1.5 liter hydrocele (the result of a bad landing on the saddle of a dirt bike). The nice thing about these things is that it feels so GOOD when they're gone... :D

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  18. Wow, that is a lot of Real Life thrown at you all at once. I hope your affected feel relief very soon.

    There is an old Spanish dicho - WHAT CANNOT BE REMEDIED MUST BE ENDURED. The original is worded differently, but the same thought is passed on.

    We are praying and pulling for you to pull through this trial by fire.

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  19. I am a long time reader and have enjoyed both Stilton's Place and Johnny Optimism for years. Praying for you and your family.

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  20. Prayer for you and family

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  21. Is this where the statement "the luck of the Irish" came from........ Continuing prayers for all of you.

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  22. Is this where the term “baby-cyster” came from? Hang in there, Stilt…we’re all here for you 🥃

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  23. God's blessings on you and the clan. The Jarlsberg household will definitely remain in our prayers for the duration.

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  24. Wondering if locusts will be visiting your home is on the agenda? Keep the faith, best wishes and prayers.

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  25. As my wife of 48 years was told about chemo when she was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer: the body is poisoned in a game of chicken to see if we can kill the cancer before it or we kill you. She, too, was given just two weeks after the initial diagnoses (she made 10 months with the chemo).

    I liken the time to be like the original white elephants: a gift of incalculable worth, but at a great price. The patient (and family) is given opportunity (but not the energy) to give closure to things, but even that is tempered by the patient's chemo brain.

    I know your pain.

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  26. I'm so sorry you are all going through such hard times.

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  27. Definitely more prayers for you, your wife, and your daughter. Keep the faith and your sense of humor.

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  28. May happiness return to make today's troubles a faded memory.

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  29. Good Lord. Certainly glad for your unassailable sense of humor today. Very thankful your daughter's tumor is most likely benign. Prayers and good thoughts to the Missus that by the time the wheelchair arrives she won't need it...although we're definitely on the same page...I'd have done the same, attempting to keep things moving forward for my better half should this have been her.

    Sorry to hear about the teeth. I was the other way 'round...excellent teeth...genetic "second adult" bone recession...necessitating removal of um...all the teeth. It's been almost two years and wearing dentures is still uncomfortable. Fortunately, I'm a decent cook and can create dishes that are not "too chewy" for gumming.

    Carry on, and thanks for the updates. Again, all we can send are best wishes, positive thoughts and prayers for your wife but be sure we are doing THAT.

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  30. I'm praying for you luck to turn.

    Thank God that your daughter s/b fine.

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  31. Whew! When they say misfortune comes in bunches. Sounds as if you've had a stampede.

    Hope your friend's cancer was detected early, that's key in prostate treatment from what I understand and have experienced myself.

    Heartened though to see you've still kept your fine sense of humor with you as you write about all of this. And keep in mind the current WH occupant, President Le Petomane, can't say ' I did that!'

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  32. It sounds like the only break you can catch is in a bone. When I was growing up our family's daily soap opera was referred to "As The Stomach Turns." This "lifestyle" circus you're having isn't supposed to be a competition for "How Can Things Get Worse."

    Maybe your daughter can find a surgeon who wants to do a variation on "Dr. Pimple Popper" and we can all enjoy the procedure!

    Maybe a change of scotch might help your teeth.

    As hard as it might seem, our gubbermint is in even worse shape than your luck these days. But you have enough distractions in your life to worry about that. All of your supporters can wail and gnash our teeth for you!

    We're all "Hopin' & Prayin'" for you.

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  33. This doesn't happen often, but I'm speechless. I hesitate to ponder what happens next.

    Perhaps an anti-terror probe on you all from the DOJ & FBI is in order.

    Naturally, we're adding Daughter J to the prayer list. I finally got around to donating blood yesterday, so the odds have just doubled that it will go to a Jarlesberg. Yes, I did have two slices of Costco pizza for lunch before going.

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  34. Wish I had a way to express my kind thoughts toward you and yours. I just don't have the words.

    In the meantime, Power Chairs go for somewhere above six-thousand dollars but, you may be able to score one for free by asking a senior home or an extended-care center. I have repaired and given away sixteen of them but I live in Montana and shipment would be prohibitive.

    Best of luck. There really is a God and He'll take care of you.

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  35. I had the same condition as your beloved daughter. They whipped that puppy out and I was back on track in just a few weeks. Really, just a speed bump in the course of life.

    Bless your family, you're in my prayers.

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  36. @Readers- So good hearing from all of you and all of the positive thoughts (and jokes) are appreciated. I just want to share a few points of clarification: while I have purchased a wheelchair, the hope is that it will be rarely if ever used. Extreme fatigue is a symptom of AML, but if treatment is going successfully a wheelchair shouldn't be needed except during the especially low spots immediately following chemo. But I'm a big "just in case" guy so it seemed like a good idea to get one, not just for Kathy but for Daughter J if she needs some assistance post-surgery, or even for me if a hip goes out or something.

    My dental situation is stupid: after decades of no cavities, everything went into the crapper during the pandemic and the tartar built up at my gumline (despite brushing - honest!) when 6-month cleanings seemed like a bad idea. Decay started under that tartar and now I need 6 crowns and 3 fillings. I'd probably need even more if Clan MacGregor wasn't regularly disinfecting my gums.

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  37. Well, it certainly looks like the Jarlsbergs are the poster family for When Bad Things Happen To Good People. If y'all were a country, you'd be America suffering under the Biden-Harris administration.

    But just like America, you're going to weather the storm and emerge unbowed, beginning a long, steady period of improvement. Helped along, of course, by a continuing stream of positive thoughts and prayers.

    Stay Strong!

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  38. Prayers for each of your troubles. And, yes. It's Ok to laugh. Many years ago my old Irish neighbor always said, "If you don't laugh, you'll cry." Mrs. Griffin was right.

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  39. Oh! A tumor the size of a watermelon might be good to sell off to the highest bidder among the research hospitals! Maybe Ms. J should start an auction?

    Tell Kathy that she is loved. May you both have the strength to endure. Obviously you already have the sense of humor to make us want to grin, but not laugh since the situation is so darned serious! Blessings for your family.

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  40. Stilton: have you noticed that people are starting to keep their distance from you, just in case that errant thunderbolt comes flashing out of the sky, aimed straight for your luckless head? It's beginning to sound like four simultaneous flat tires and a blown fuel pump would be a step up for you.

    You and your family remain in our prayers. I would say thing's couldn't get much worse, but you're getting right up there with Job when it comes to tribulations.

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  41. Stilton, Kathy and Daughter,

    Continued prayers from the Muenster household! "They" say bad things come in threes, so our prayers say now you are headed out of the woods into the clear air and relief.

    My dentist of 35 years recently retired, and the replacement young whippersnapper dentist wanted to replace all of my crowns and bridges. I took immediate action... found a new dentist who wasn't trying to make payments on his new Porsche 911 Turbo.

    @June,
    Yours was a puppy!? And I thought a watermelon was bizarre.

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  42. I well now what you are going through. My beautiful and loving wife lost the battle with the Big C a year ago. As bad as it was for her, I was just as bad on us. No useless advice from me, brother. But I am sending prayers for all of you.

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  43. Hang in there Mr.Stilton, hoping and praying for y’all to catch a break!

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  44. OMG. Prayers continue. Thanksgiving is only around a week away.

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  45. Prayers. Just PRAYERS !!

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  46. Damn, Stilt. This IS Texas, so when it rains, it pours. All of us who follow you need to get together and get you a couple cases of Clan McGregor for Christmas. Prayers, dude, prayers for all, including you. Gotta keep your strength up too as those most close need you healthy.

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  47. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  48. It's hard to read this without reliving Kim's last few months - including the abdominal bit. As we were battling Kim's pancreatic cancer, my youngest daughter got appendicitis. On election day. When the entire country got dementia, thanks to Dominion's vote...

    Cousin Stilt, I wish you all the best. You and Kathy and Ms. J. I continue to pray for all of you. I hope for better outcomes for you and yours.

    -Pat aka Emmentaler Limburger

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  49. @Patrick- Much appreciated. You and Kim have been on my mind a lot in recent weeks, and I've returned to your blog more than once for the wisdom and humanity there.

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  50. Thank you for the update, Stilton. It’s like hearing from a family member. Your hilarious sense of humor is a bonus. Daily prayers for all of you.

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  51. Well, Maoz, hasn't left me much choice!

    [Desi Arnaz warming up in the bullpen to the beat of one-two-three-four-five-SIX!]

    Conga-line for Kath-EE!
    Prayers for her will work, SEE!
    Add on daughter J's CYST!
    One more thing on the LIST!

    She needs Clan McMor-PHINE!
    Worst damn luck that I've SEEN!
    Piling on to 'Ol STILT!
    Lord help him not to WILT!

    Now his teeth feel so SAD!
    Dental bills are so BAD!
    Dentist wants a new CAR!
    You should kick him so FAR!

    Do you know any-ONE
    Who is having less FUN
    Than the one called Stilt-ON
    Who must think his luck's DONE?

    But we're all behind YOU
    Jarlsberg fans are some CREW,
    Pray to break the Hoo-DOO,
    We all know you'll come THROUGH!

    [Rinse, repeat!]

    TVAG

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  52. I was going to suggest that upon its "birth" filing for a Social Security for Daughter J's "baby". But alas, thanks to "Build Back Better", even that won't be necessary in order to collect benefits:

    ‘Build Back Better’ Would Remove SSN Requirement For Child Tax Credit

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  53. Still here for you, and still praying for you, my friend.

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  54. Stilt, on a very serious note, just know that God does not give you more than you can handle - apparently you are made of some extremely STRONG stuff!
    Our prayers are with you, may He hold you and your family in the Hollow of His Hand, supporting you as only He can!
    Hang in there, fellow mortal traveler.

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  55. May the watermelon prove to be benign.

    Now there's a sentence I hadn't planned to write today.

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  56. Cheese and rice...when it rains, it pours.

    Praying that these trials will come to a (happy) end very soon.

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  57. Just saw your latest, so wanted to say that you and yours are still in my prayers. What else could possibly go wrong now, hope that is not tempting fate. Stay strong, now more than ever.

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  58. There has to be a country song or two in this series of events. Absolutely has to be.

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  59. I was just worrying about you guys last night, you know, midnight thoughts when you're trying to sleep, lol. Will work on the prayers for you guys some more. And glad to hear daughter J has your sense of humor too.

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  60. Dude, you have fans and supporters. Set up a gofunny.me account or JarlsbergPessimism account and we will be there for you.

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  61. Prayers continue, and now for the younger J as well as for you.
    .
    NSF

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  62. As a very young girl I excepted God & Jesus into my heart & soul. I had a moment in my life as a child of 7 years old that has been with me ever since... it was a spiritual moment. I was given a message of how my life was going to be. At 7 years old I didn't think much of the message, but once I hit 16 the message scared the shit out of me from then on. I have had pure evil hit upon me numerous times, but someone has always protected me from the out comes, making sure I survived, at least physically. Mentally, I am not sure of. At 30 they found a breast lump. At 34 they found another one. At 35 I had the beginning stages of cervical cancer. 3 surgeries later all was good. At 36 I was diagnosed with a rare lung disease that has been trying to kill me for a few decades, but I'm fighting that sucker every day. At 46 they found 3 Tarlov cysts on my lower spine, one which has eaten through the bone, one pressing on the sciatica nerve, & the other pressing on other nerves. At 56 I was diagnosed with esophageal necrosis (look that sucker up.)I stopped the lung disease medication, a form of chemo in a bunch of pills because I wanted to commit suicide 24/7 due to the pain from head to toe that they caused. So now I just deal with the pain in my lungs and try to breathe life, which is hard. I told the doctors no when they wanted to remove my left lung. I try to swallow slowly because I have no living cells in my esophagus and pop lots of Tylenol from the swelling that makes even spit hard to swallow. I told the doctors no to removing most of my esophagus. I sleep in a recliner and sometimes live in it due to the pain in my back. The scoliosis I was born with and the Tarlov cysts are trying their best to do me in. But that's just what daily life is like for me. I've made it thru evilness of other natures... strangers raping me... a husband who beat me and tried to kill me with his gun.. they tried to do me in, but someone was always protecting me... someone I can't see or hear or feel. Why I was told that my life was going to be filled with so much pain & suffering as a child I don't know why. It sure as hell didn't make me strong, but what it did do was make me say I was in charge of my body. When the searing pain in my lungs makes me scream out loud, I put my hands on my chest and say, "your not going to do this to me... I am in control of my body and I want the pain to go away." And for some miraculous reason, the pain goes away, at least for that moment.
    I want your family to know that if they believe in themselves, they might be able to take the pain away, that they can be their own healers. I want your family to know that they don't need to go to church, or communion, or confession, but if they talk to our Creator & our Savior, God & Jesus, they will feel an invisible presence. Writing this to you has been hard. Your only the 3rd person in my life that has heard my story. I just recently spoke to my doctor of 35 years, about the message I received as a child, & expected him to send me to a padded room, but when I told him the voice that spoke to me came from my bedroom ceiling and that I was either totally nuts or maybe it was an E.T. who spoke to me, & He replied that it could be that I was 'special.' I don't feel special, but I do know that someone from some place has been keeping me alive. Keeping me alive thru 30 years of physical pain and 45 years of mental pain. Your family can heal themselves from a lot of the pain, and so can you. And some where in this Universe, someone else may heal all of you too. Like Mikey says, "just try it." Blessings to you, your wife, & daughter. Your in my prayers. Mary In Minnesota... go get a cute fluffy puppy that your wife will love to have cuddle in her lap. Bring that special bond a dog brings into ones life to all of your hearts. Bring some more love home.

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  63. Politically, I’ve accepted that you’re an idiot. But as a fellow human, my best to you and your family; you all deserve better luck than this. May (good) karma shine on you for sustaining so much. –a leftist lib

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  64. I envy your sense of humor, sometimes thats all you have to get you trough tough times.
    I say a prayer all turns out well

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  65. I envy your sense of humor, sometimes thats all you have to get you trough tough times.
    I say a prayer all turns out well

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  66. Jeez; I hope that's a little designer watermelon and not a state fair champion. Ya'll deserve some breaks.

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  67. @TashTish- I appreciate the positive sentiment and would love to have a civil discussion about politics someday.

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  68. Mom always said "Cheer up, things could be worse!"
    So I cheered up....and sure enough...things got worse!! ;o]

    One day the sun will shine again...warmer and brighter than ever before.

    t

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  69. I'd say you and your family are about due for some good luck. Very best wishes.

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  70. As far as those cysts go - I had one, in 1996. The doctor, like your daughter's, wanted to give me some meds that would shrink it. This would have been a 3-month action (or more).
    My husband put his foot down, said that I was experiencing urination difficulties (I had to go ALL the time), and that he should schedule surgery ASAP.
    When they operated, they expected to find an cyst small enough to be removed vaginally. Nope, it was the size of a large grapefruit, and needed an abdominal removal, along with a hysterectomy. I'd only OK'd removal of the uterus, not the ovaries, so that's what they did.
    It all worked out.
    But, the medical treatment to shrink it might be in her best interests. It would make any eventual surgery less complicated.

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  71. What LenSatic said. We're all family here. Let us help. By the way, we don't call each other names. Love, Glen and Sioux.

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  72. @Readers- Once again I'm overwhelmed by all the support, good wishes, and good humor. I'm writing this on Monday Nov 22 and my little family is doing pretty well today, all considered. We'll be going for a fill-up of blood products this afternoon, which is tiring and boring but not overly dramatic. No word yet on Daughter J's surgical schedule, but the day (and week) are still young.

    For those of you who have suggested that I create a fundraising page, I can assure you that you're already doing enough by making this a fun-raising page (see what I did there?) Fiscally speaking, we're doing fine and haven't faced burdensome bills yet. That might change if we eventually get involved with a clinical trial that isn't covered by Medicare, but so far everything has seemingly been covered - and Medicare will even pay for an eventual stem cell transplant. So we've got no money worries.

    The personal stories and experiences you've been sharing here are moving and instructive, and remind me that my family isn't facing burdens that are unique to us. It's a rough road for all of us, albeit easier to travel thanks to friendship and a sense of community.

    This morning's project will be assembling the wheelchair that Walmart just delivered to our front door. Hopefully we'll never need to use it, but it seems like a good addition to our "just in case" supplies. At the very least, we can keep it in the guest room in case Johnny Optimism drops in for a visit.

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  73. @Stilton,

    Thanks for the update. I feel that most of us here have mother hen tendencies, so it's nice to have the updates.

    Good luck with the wheelchair!

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  74. By the way Stilt: I can't get it out of my mind. That Johnny Optimism 'toon about Halloween, and no Trick or Treating but he... well, you know. That's one of the darkest but hilarious funnies I've seen. Genius, but very worrisome genius.

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  75. @Rod- Yeah, Johnny Optimism has gone even darker, and cancer and chemo are no longer off-limits. It's how I cope.

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  76. Stilton Jarlsberg, words don't fail me, but none I might put together could possibly express the depth of (em)pathetic feelings I have when I read your updates and comments.

    I have a on-going saga with wife of 30 years (marriage, not age). She has -- with fully informed consent -- undergone three major operations within the past year, including a major portion of her colon removed due to an invasive polyp, she a regular, conscientious subject to colonoscopy, which indeed revealed over time a major problem in her intestinal tract. +1 for the good doctor in that "colonoscopy clinic"; and lung cancer diagnosis leading to removal of her upper right lobe. In the very wake for her last operation, she took two rounds of the MODERNA "vaccines"!

    Then she took on most of the driving as we moved the remaining, precious items of our household -- a moving company took tons of stuff before we departed Kalifornication -- to Mexico. She drove the entirety of our trip with three dogs and a loaded pickup through Mexican states to our destination, about 2500 miles if I recall that number rightly.

    My wife has proved remarkably resilient, considering all that has befallen her, heath-wise. Not knowing whcih "batch" of Moderna injections she received, I can only wait with bated breath, fear held at bay, if her health declines precipitous as reported for others who got double-jabbed, some now even with "boosters".

    You are not alone in your suffering! GOD bless and His Grace bring healing to all the Jarlsbergs!

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  78. Stilt: Thanks for the updates. If anything, they have helped me stop whining about small annoyances. I thank God every day that I am relatively healthy at 84, and hope to keep that ball rolling for at least a few more years.

    My prayers go out to you and your family, and don't worry about the reduced schedule of your newsletter.

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  79. You have certainly been hit with a triple whammy and I do hope everything goes well for your wife's stem cell treatment. Prayers going up, fingers crossed. Don't lose your sense of humor. It's what gets us through the darkest days!

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  80. Newsflash: Bank of America is advising its employees to avoid being a “target” for crime and to dress down and leave the jewelry in a bank safe as cities are plagued with
    horrific brigandage. So, wear a cheap dime store wedding band and go to Goodwill to “dress down” in this new “Gangsta Paradise”.

    Old America: “Look at these gorgeous pearls he bought me.”
    New America: “Wear that! Are you trying to get me killed you SOB?”

    Verse to the tune Gangsta Paradise

    Smash and grab and get released.
    As high end stores get their ass fleeced.
    Joe and the WOKES they feel so low,
    My robbing crew homies always let go.

    To the tune The Red Red Robin

    When we go a robbing
    we'll be all smiles
    we'll sing,
    and shout.

    The jails are bursting
    no room for bastards
    that were
    pumped out.

    Grab me
    some Nikes
    size thirteen
    a Tommy
    H sweater
    my dream
    and get a slap on the wrist
    as I keep
    the Rolex
    that I did lift.


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  81. Merry Christmas. Me God help you with Medical Problems. You are great.

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