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As you've already noticed, we're skipping the news today because we didn't feel like spending Easter trying to find a rib-tickling angle to Donald Trump and Kim Jung Un's ongoing game of nuclear chicken. Oh, there's probably a joke to be had about the Easter Bunny and a "hare raising" arms race, but we've got far too much pride to go down that road.
But hey, at least there's an Earwigs cartoon tucked into your basket of goodies between the Cadbury eggs and marshmallow Peeps, as well as this blast from the past...
FROM THE VAULT: Originally Published April 12, 2009
Now Mildred, you make sure to bury your husbands ear deep this time! We don't want that coming back again!
ReplyDeleteJust thought I would rattle the cage a bit. Let's have a contest and try to guess where the next MOAB will fall. Could it be Pyongyang, Tehran, Damascus, Chicago, or even Iraq? So many choices, so little time. I'm feeling so devilish today........
ReplyDelete@ Fred Ciampi
ReplyDeletehow about DNC HQ? or Maxine Waters house?
YES, YES, YES!!! And I could add a couple of dozen names to it..............
ReplyDeleteFred I vote for chicongo
ReplyDeleteNow take it twice a day Miss Smith and if your erection last more then 4 hours........
I am sorry but the extra large ones only come in black............
ReplyDeleteC'mon, guys, would not need a MOAB for those two, OKC style trucker would would do nicely..
ReplyDeleteFor Urban Renewal in Chi, however...
Collateral damage would be a nightmare, though - possible to have a 'free lunch' bbq / meeting b/n gangstas and city leadership, from Rahm on down? An 'enriched' environment, as it were?
Spent a good portion of last evening link surfing the billwhittlechannel on you tube. Not EVERYthing he's done is brilliant, especially the live shows (hey, they're live, or course they're less polished) but overall, the guy's brilliant and deserves more exposure and support. Especially as he's for Thorium based nuke power (less nasty waste, can't melt down...)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fL9j_s_eLvU
@porkyspen- Ooh, eerie. (See what I did there?)
ReplyDelete@Fred Ciampi- Let's focus on foreign targets to keep this blog on the good side of the NSA (nervous grin).
@jlw- As I said, I appreciate the tongue-in-cheek suggestion, but I must officially state that the policy of Stilton's Place is not to shoot, bomb, incinerate, or in any other way cause or condone bodily harm to domestic politicians just because they're anti-American assholes.
@Fred Ciampi- Stop it. (grin)
@REM 1875- "If your erection lasts more than 4 hours, maybe the wristwatch you put on it is too tight."
@Pete (Detroit)- Okay, even in JEST let's not go down the OKC road. Especially as my beloved daughter is on the road to OKC at this very moment, and I don't want to invite bad karma.
And yes, I'm a real fan of Bill Whittle. He's smart, eloquent, and usually right.
OK, I'll leave the domestic terr.... oops, I mean politicians off the list. And no domestic cities either. I don't want the black SUVs coming up my driveway either. Actually, in both cases karma should rear its head and allow nature to take its own course.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the correct link. At least the first link got me to the facebook page and that was enjoyable. All's well that ends well !
ReplyDeleteThe morning was going just fine until I saw the image you posted of OSambo! Please try to refrain from posting anything that remotely resembles that clown and community agitator!
ReplyDeleteOK,Stilt, dropping like a bad falaffel...
ReplyDeleteNo offense intended, and wishing only the best karma on Daughter J (Sorry she's too busy to play, she had some insightful comments a while back..)
But yes, even in jest, no threats, as some people can not afford to not take them seriously...
On the lighter side, freeway north of here is closed because of a rolled / spilled tanker truck - of milk!
Apparently, it's as big a mess as if it were gasoline! Go figure!
Less dangerous, and less environmental impact, I'd think, but enough of a puddle to close the road...
Now, for something completely random, George Carlin, grammar nazi... and no, it's not worksafe, kid safe, or any other "safe"
ReplyDeleteGeorge effin' CARLIN, man!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bn9elWR13Z4
Latecomer here...
ReplyDelete"Trust me, Mrs. Reid, slip one of these into his Ovaltine every night, and you'll be playing 'hide the sausage' before you know it!"
Apologies... You really can beat the first caption!
ReplyDelete"Mrs. Reid"????
ReplyDeleteDo you suppose she's ALSO known as "Hairy"?
OR Let's be nice: "How old ARE these cookies dear lady? I seem to remember my mother ordering them when you were a Girl Scout."
ReplyDelete• I'm sorry, madam, that's the largest model we stock. I can special-order, though.
ReplyDelete• No, madam, you can't try it for size in the fitting room.
• That, madam, is why you shouldn't let your husband shop here unaccompanied.
• Yes, your daughter will enjoy that at band camp, I'm sure.
• I assure madam that it is, indeed, a snake coffin. Of course, you may have to fold the dear departed once or twice.
• I suggest madam select the 16" barrel, instead, in order to avoid running afoul of the ATF.
• I'm sorry, madam, that's the only heavy-metal player-piano roll we have at the moment.
• Trust me, madam, you put that upside 'is 'ead, and you'll get his attention.
• Would madam also like to see a nice inner-thigh-strap knife sheath?
• I assure madam that this bull's penis has never been frozen.
• Would madam like this wrapped in a plain brown wrapper?
etc.
@Readers- I enjoyed your additional cartoon captions!
ReplyDelete@DougM- Wow, you've really gotten into the spirit of the thing!