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Friday, October 18, 2019

Stand Up Guy

stilton’s place, stilton, political, humor, conservative, cartoons, jokes, hope n’ change, pelosi, third rate, illegals, sanders, hunter biden, comedian, stand up, comic

For those of you keeping score, here's the story about Nancy Pelosi staging a highly choreographed walkout on the President, here's the story about there being twice as many illegal aliens in our country than were previously reported (and the number is still erroneously low), and here's the story in which scientists say that less neural activity translates to a longer life...which raises the terrifying possibility that Democrat freshman Alexandria Foccacia-Croutons may actually be immortal.

Frankly, we occasionally think about buying a loud shirt and a stylish hat and popping in front of a camera to do a stand-up comedy act about current news events (eons ago, we actually did stand-up comedy, albeit nothing political).

But video seems to be a young person's medium and, additionally, one that looks suspiciously like work. Moreover, Youtube seems pretty consistent about trying to bury anyone with a conservative viewpoint - let alone a politically incorrect sense of humor.

Still...someday...maybe...?

In the meanwhile, you may be seeing more of our brassy friend above from time to time...assuming that I can stuff him back in my Id afterwards.

23 comments:

Pat Cummings said...

Stilt, those quoted "scientific results" seem outstandingly odd, especially when you reflect on the notoriously short shelf life of vegetables.

Not sayin' anything about Twinkies, however, as that might be considered homophobic...

Section147 said...

In the meanwhile, I’d like to see more of Busty’s dressing room myownself!

Jim Irre said...

Standard political trick. Be the first to make the accusation and your opponent is put on defense. Frankly, I hope Trump ignores it. But he won't.

M. Mitchell Marmel said...

Hm. Shecky Greenecheese?

Fish Out of Water said...

A real life illustration of what the posters/readers of this blog think is 'The Swamp'

Wife unit and I will mark our 38th anniversary this weekend and thought it'd be nice to go to a Japanese restaurant in town (DC) to celebrate. There is one restaurant, called Nobu (which I learn is a chain) that was a candidate.

Looked up its offerings and prices on the web (should I thank Al Bore?) and first on the screen were the drink offerings. Scrolling down the pricey selections spotted a 60 oz bottle of sake for which 3k, yep, $3,000 was the price of.

Now to be fair, I haven't gone back to check out the maker, and I don't consider myself stingy, but I'll stand outside the WH clad only in a thong and sing the Steelers fight song before I spend 3k on a bottle of sake.

But now to the point. What sort of place is Washington DC now when a restaurant can charge that sort of money for something the drinker will eventually pee out anyway, and a lobbying/consulting firm, business, etc. can blithely put something like this on their tab/expense report and not have an eyebrow raised?

Fred Ciampi said...

I agree that calling the governor of California's aunt (that would be Nancy the great) a third rate politician is a promotion. And that goes for approximately 82.56% of all politicians. So there!!!

james daily said...

I added my mental rim shots to the stand up. The Nancy walkout was all staged so that she could disparage President Trump. It must have killed them that he got a cease fire from Turkey. All those that wanted our soldiers in harm's way now have egg on their faces which is an improvement, including former RINO G. Bush.
On the bright side, the Dallas Rally was outstanding and that must have galled the local Dallas politicians which is no bad thing. I did not see a head count but it must have been around 40,000 or so. Great Rally.

Anonymous said...

Funny guy this.

But ...

The underlying points out how much work the Right has to do. When its SO OBVIOUS the Left has not only contempt for 'The Rich', the contempt for anyone that disagrees with ANYTHING they have in mind what everyone will live with. Going Green Mandatory - check. Gender Studies - Science is Settled. Free Money for Those in Need (bet that amount will go up yearly, vs. Social Security adjustments being corrected. And on and on ...

Someday soon, its going to go full bore Rwanda. No fixed battle lines, the combatants are all around you (if you live in the urbans, not many Progressives live out in the Boonies). People are far too committed to doing battle rather than working toward a common sense solution.

IT ISN'T GOING TO BE ALL FIXED IN A WEEK OR YEAR - THIS WILL TAKE DECADES.

But the 'Gotta Have It All Now' crowd won't like that answer.

Jon said...

If you ever put up a channel I'd hit the like button, subscribe and even maybe tap the notification bell. Depending on if anyone was around of course.

TrickyRicky said...

Sometimes it's better to laugh than cry, or rend garments, or gnash teeth, or commit homicide, or.....you get the point. Too bad the left has all but killed comedy.

Alfonso Bedoya said...

As I finished reading each balloon, the only things I missed were the follow-up snare drum/cymbal splashes. Of course, as a jazz drummer, my brain has been attuned to anticipating such vagaries. Unfortunately, a similar affliction occurs whenever Nancy Pelosi opens her mouth.

rickn8or said...

I'm just thinking what Carlin, Kinnison and Hicks could turn out these days. They never had raw material like this to work with.

Colby Muenster said...

Stilton,
I don't thank you often enough for your wonderful distractions for the ongoing, "years in the making" Trump assault. Imagine what constructive things could happen if Shiff, Nadler et al would just do their effing jobs, and forget about punishing Trump for beating their precious Shrillary!

So, thank you!

@Fish out of Water,
I think I know what sort of clientele of that DC restaurant are buying those $3000 bottles of wine. It's the same people that are spending our money to destroy our President. And it's probably our damn money paying for the wine! And here we are stuck drinking Old Milwaukee or Clan MacGregor.

@Alfonso Bedoya,
I was a drummer too, years ago, and like your, "snare drum/cymbal splashes" phrase. We both know a rim shot is when you simultaneously strike the drum head and rim with the stick, and it just goes "pop," not "ba-da-bump.... ching." But now I'm being anal....

Regnad Kcin said...

Clan MacGregor, uh, nope. Make mine Ballantine. Let's you cop that elusive buzz while delousing your scalp at the same time. BTW, tried the veal... meh ! Maybe the Carp Almondine on my next visit...........

Emmentaler Limburger said...

Democrat freshman Alexandria Foccacia-Croutons may actually be immortal.
Scary thought, but your comment still wins the internet today...

Youtube seems pretty consistent about trying to bury anyone with a conservative viewpoint
I there a Clinton on their board? THey're pretty good at burying those, too...

Left has not only contempt for 'The Rich'
You left off other than themselves. It is notabe how Bernie now pick on only the billionaires since he's joined the ranks of millionaires.

Alfonso Bedoya said...

Stilton, I'm glad to hear you were a drummer. Takes an enormous amount of practice, and if playing with a group, sometimes a lot of rehearsals. I hated having to spend time at some of the repetitious practices (twice a week was more than enough). But....that's the price of playing with a group, whether it be small, large or with a concert band.

I'm now retired, and would love to play with a big jazz band, but only as a "ringer," where I could just drag the drums to a stage, set up the kit and play. Maybe it will happen, but I and my wife and sold our house in Santa Rosa, CA and left our friends and grown children to move to Prescott, AZ. Big move at our ages (82 and 72), but so what....we go around only once in this lifetime, and if there is life-after-death, I hope to meet some great jazz artists, such as Miles Davis, Cal Tjader, Shorty Rogers, and my all-time favorite drummer: Buddy Rich.

We have been here in Prescott only six months, but the 2-acre former-horse property we bought has been keeping us busy, what with cutting down weeds, removing dead wood from the trees and generally getting the house in shape. Not much time for anything else, but your great website and incomparable wit have been such a great help to keep us going. I thank you for that....a million times.


















George said...

@Alfonso....Colby was the drummer, not Stilton. :)

Craig said...

You left Santa Rosa before the PG$E pissing contest power shutdown, good call.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Pat Cummings- I find a lot of "scientific results" highly questionable these days. Although these scientists were clever: they say if you think about their results too much, it will kill you.

@Section147- I've heard good things about the undressing room, too.

@Jim Irre- Trump doesn't really ignore anything, real or imagined. That's what makes him, um, "special."

@M. Mitchell Marmel- I like that!

@Fish Out of Water- A very telling anecdote! Who the heck DOES have that sort of money to blow without caring? Hint: pretty much no one honest. By the way, I did the math and I could get 200 jugs of Clan MacGregor for the price of that bottle of sake. Granted, the waiter would probably be pissed having to carry them all to my table...

@Fred Ciampi- I'm with you. A pox on the lot of them.

@james daily- The ceasefire did come at an uncomfortable time for those who were already bitching about Trump. And it sounds like the Trump rally in Dallas was great, which surely did honk off the local politicians. I live in a suburb of Dallas, and it gives me joy to think of the angst felt by the whackjobs at city hall.

@Anonymous- I pray that no Rwanda scenario will ever arise. That being said, you're right that there's no quick fix: the Left is currently empowered by the unrealistic expectations (ie, free stuff and ideological purity) of their voters. Those expectations need to be changed, but it's going to be a hard road considering the Left controls the media and universities. But somehow it needs to happen if this nation is going to survive in recognizable form.

@Jon- Thanks! If I ever DO create a channel, you'll see it here first!

@TrickyRicky- I completely agree (although you already know that from this blog and Johnny Optimism).

@Alfonso Bedoya- Yes, rimshots would be welcome - but I couldn't even hint at them for lack of space. And now you've made me want to take a Pelosi video and add rimshots every time she says something ridiculous. Hmm...

@rickn8or- We need those voices now. I feel like there's a little Sam Kinnison screaming in my head a lot of the time.

@Colby Muenster- You pose a great "what if" scenario; what if the Democrats accepted the great progress made in the country over the last several years, and then tried to make things even better rather than fighting that progress? Sadly, it will never happen.

@Rednad Kcin- Or try the chicken ala king! It's almost as good as when it was fresh yesterday!

@Emmentaler Limburger- Yeah, Bernie has gotten a little more selective about who is in the "evil rich" now that he's a millionaire with multiple homes. Although we also know that he plans (without admitting it) to gut the "evil middle class."

@Alfonso Bedoya- Actually I didn't mention being a drummer...although I was for about six months. You know that "enormous amount of practice" you mentioned? I really couldn't/didn't keep up with it. But wow, big points to you for actually making the commitment. I love to hear great drumming. And I'm impressed by the description that you and your wife are doing - I'm about 15 years your junior, but just reading about your chores left me exhausted!

@George- For a short while, I played electric kazoo in a band. It got no love.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Craig- I saw online today that those blackouts may be ongoing for a decade or so. No thanks!

Fred Ciampi said...

And speaking of the blackouts; my take on the situation is the generalissimos (gubbioner, etc.) are making a trial run. First, see how far the people can be pushed without pushing back. Then you push a little more, and more until the rulers, emperors, members of the royalty and their ilk have complete power. At that point our republic is done for. At least in California right now. With the red flag laws there it won't be long before all of the law abiding citizens are disarmed. And from what I have seen there (I grew up in CA) the police are as power hungry and abusive as in any third world country. Other states such as Maryland and Connecticut are watching California to see how far they will get. Then they will do the same thing. At that point the only thing that will save our republic will be the 60 million or so armed patriots who will have had enough.

Pat Cummings said...

@Alfonso Bedoya: My spouse and I also moved from Santa Rosa, CA, to get away from crazy Cal to a saner place... in our case, rural Utah. And it had nothing to do with the house two doors away from ours that burned to the ground in 2017!

And @Craig: my fear is that the PG&E stance—a reasonable reaction to being blamed (and sued) for wildfires like many that happened long before the powerlines went in, and which today have more to do with "environmental" policies than power company mistakes—will drive lots of blue folks to neighboring Western states like Arizona and Utah. They'll bring their misguided attitudes and politics with them. And Alfonso and I will have to move again...

@Fred Ciampi: I'm afraid your scenario doesn't take into account the many, many sane people who pack up their guns and ammo and move elsewhere, where the nanny in the state doesn't carry a whip and a warrant! The sheep stay.

Rod said...

The topics above are only a small part of the reason we plan to keep sizable wood-lot acreage in the family. Others reasons are: It's increasing nicely in value; & it provides outdoor space & R&R. All of them: trees, crops, deer & wild turkey (and hopefully for long-term) the deep high-quality aquifer water resource... are "renewable". This is a state where land ownership above carries the right to it. We're not All country; but enough.