Poker Face

Senate Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi just set an official record by flapping her yap for over 8 hours (and 2 adult diapers) on the subject of why legal citizens should get nothing in the budget if illegal aliens aren't allowed - indeed, encouraged - to remain in our country.

In fairness, the majority of those illegals work hard during their annual, back-breaking harvest of taxpayer-funded entitlements. And let's not forget that you can't be a Dreamer without taking time for siestas.

It is thought by some that Ms. Pelosi chose to speak so long in order to quell growing rumors that she is suffering from senile dementia. It is thought by others that her remarks ran so long because she kept forgetting her place in what should have been a 20 minute speech and kept starting over again.

All we know is that Nancy has, once again, set a record which will always be enshrined in the hallowed annals of the STFU.

BONUS: LAST TANGO IN PRYOR

To be clear on the subject, Stilton's Place is still Gay friendly and relatively non-judgmental about relationships between consenting adults in which no one gets hurt. Unless, of course, that's what turns them on.

Still, the news that groundbreaking comedian Richard Pryor and mumbling blob Marlon Brando were lovers is just a little more than we can take without reaching for a stiff drink and then immediately regretting our use of the word "stiff." Also, remembering Brando's "Last Tango in Paris," we don't expect to be using butter again for a long, long time.

What bothers us isn't so much their proclivities, which are none of our business, but rather that hearing Pryor and Brando's names jammed together in this context puts specific images in our head that we don't want to have. In much the same way that we don't really want to imagine the bedroom bliss of entirely heterosexual luminaries like Danny DeVito and Rhea Perlman.

Then again, maybe we're just upset because the damn stock market is still plunging,  so we're more than a little sensitive about any subject related to taking it up the poop chute.

Stocks and Bondage

Is it just us, or does the timing of the wild, stomach-churning chaos in the stock market over the past few days seem awfully convenient for those anxious to distract Americans from the near-coups attempted by Democrats, intelligence agencies, and media outlets?

Following release of the Nunes memo, concerned citizens were just starting to dust off their pitchforks and fill up their tar-and-feather barrels, when suddenly the market dropped faster than Bill Clinton's pants.

Did some highly-placed, highly-funded person or persons know exactly what and when to sell to send automatic trading computers into a cyber-stampede "flash crash?" We don't know, and we have no proof - but then, the idiot who wrote the "Fire and Fury" book about Trump doesn't have proof of anything either, and he got a bestseller out of it! At least the stuff that we're making up is plausible!

According to the head of the financial department here at Stilton's Place, the company retirement fund  (and we quote) "took it in the nuts" on Monday. Fortunately, on Tuesday some of the painful swelling went down...although it may still be weeks before our portfolio can again ride a unicycle without agonizing pain.

Normally, we'd look at such a "rogue wave" financial event as being a fluke rather than a blatant manipulation. But now that we've gotten a look at the breadth and depth of the attempted manipulations during the last election, we're apt to be a little more suspicious than usual.

BONUS: COULDA BEEN A CONTENDER

We were hard pressed to decide which image of "Hillary the Spider" to use for Monday's post. Eventually we went with the one we liked best, but we think this more abstract version also has merit enough to deserve posting for the art lovers among you...

If she'd won, we'd currently be papering public walls with these in the dark of night.

What REALLY Happened

Click the picture for a larger size if you don't mind nightmares.

The release of the Nunes memo is big news (and the Democrats' "rebuttal memo" is no news whatsoever, no matter how the mainstream media tries to fluff it). There are many angles and perspectives which need to be pursued...but for today, we want to focus on the one illustrated above.

When we take a step backward to look at the big picture of our last Presidential election, an astonishing and terrifying truth is revealed. Queen Hillary, with all the money in the world at her disposal, literally bought the debt-ridden DNC in order to assure that she would become the nominee - disenfranchising the Democrat voters who overwhelmingly and enthusiastically supported Bernie Sanders.

She then doled out the dollars to fund the fake Russian dossier against her Republican challenger, setting in motion a Kafka-esque attack on a Presidential candidate - and every Republican voter - by an unscrupulous cabal of political flunkies, intelligence agencies, and "news" sources who expected to be rewarded for their evil deeds (and certainly never investigated or punished) following Hillary's coronation.

Think about this for a moment...and then drop to your knees and thank God that she didn't quite manage to pull it off; the first Presidential election in which virtually every voter would have been disenfranchised. Interference with an election doesn't get any bigger or more direct than that.

Hillary, dripping venom, was indeed at the center of this web...and it's a web which stretches far and wide, and is littered with the desiccated remains of those who stood between this angry arachnid and her obsessive ambition.

She did not need to give specific instructions to all the players (beyond tugging a few silken threads here and there, and occasionally baring her fangs). Like the insects they are, they already knew their jobs and roles. They understood the system down to their DNA, and the good of all depended on the good of the queen. Nothing else mattered, whether laws or professional oaths.

We came terrifyingly close to losing everything: our nation, our rights, and our freedoms. This is a crime of unimaginable scope and consequence...and to prevent it from ever happening again, we need to see vigorous investigations, prosecutions, and appropriate punishments for all who were involved.

And that web needs to be burned down.