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Friday, May 21, 2021

Black Jive Matters

stilton’s place, stilton, political, humor, conservative, cartoons, jokes, hope n’ change, lori lightfoot, racist, interviews, ugly

Remember when racism was considered shameful and its practitioners had to do so from the shadows? Apparently, that's not the case for Lori Lightfoot, the mayor of Chicago ("Home of the Weekend Body Count"), who has now declared that she'll grant no one-on-one interviews to journalists who are (and we apologize for printing an obscenity) "white."

Lightfoot is openly offended by the number of white journalists covering City Hall in Chicago, and believes that a good dose of old-time racial segregation is just the ticket to establish healthy non-diverse diversity in the press corps.

Mind you, Ms. Lightfoot (preferred pronouns: "it, that, yikes") isn't interested in assuring diversity of opinion in the local news...just diversity of pigmentation.  Because as long as anyone in Chicago is still judging people based on the content of their character rather than the color of their skin, Mayor Lightfoot's racially divisive work is not finished.

MEDICAL UPDATE

We're pleased to report that Stilton's brother is recovering nicely from his recent surgical procedure. A procedure which involved blasting away the inside of his prostate using a flamethrower (well, a cauterizing green laser) which was inserted catheter-style into Mr. Happy's peephole. Then twisted.

We shudder to think about it, but hopefully the worst is over. Thank you for the many good wishes, thoughts, and prayers. And our apologies to every male reader who won't be able to uncross their legs all day after reading the description of that surgery.

stilton’s place, stilton, political, humor, conservative, cartoons, jokes, hope n’ change, prostate, green laser, ouch

Wednesday, May 19, 2021

Daze of Our Lives

stilton’s place, stilton, political, humor, conservative, cartoons, jokes, hope n’ change, vacation, time off, day off, surgery

We're treating ourselves to a day off today (and quite possibly Friday) to take a little restorative break.  And by "restorative break," we mean freeing up extra time to argue with Medicare and Social Security about their bookkeeping, battling the bureaucracy of the Texas Department of Motor Vehicles, fretting about a twin brother (yes, he exists!) having hopefully minor surgery (think good thoughts about prostates today if you're not already in the habit of doing that), and catching up on various neglected chores.

There's nothing wrong - we're not intimidated by Google's recent "red page" stunt, our health is fine, and if no one cares that the government is now admitting that UFOs are real, unexplainable, and completely impossible for us to control or defend against, well, then we won't worry about it either. Much.

As always, the comments section is wide open to enjoy the remarks of the smartest and funniest community on the Internet!

BONUS: THE TRUTH IS UP THERE

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On a recent talk show, Barack Obama happily and casually announced that, oh yeah, UFOs are absolutely real and we have no idea what they are, how they work, or how to register them as Democrat voters.

But the great thing about making such an announcement on a comedy show is that it's then okay for everyone to treat it as comedy, right? Hey, if Barry, the host, and the laugh track are all happy about visitors whose technology makes us look like banana slugs, how could this possibly be anything worth worrying about?

Monday, May 17, 2021

Green and Bury It

stilton’s place, stilton, political, humor, conservative, cartoons, jokes, hope n’ change, lefty lucy, uighurs, china, kerry, slavery, solar panels

During a recent hearing, US Special Envoy for Climate (we don't know if there's also a Just Regular Envoy for Climate) John Kerry conceded that there's a tiny little problem with our nation's "Green New Deal" push to import millions of solar panels. And that tiny little problem is that some of those solar panels are manufactured by slaves (Uighurs, though saying that word aloud in the workplace can probably get you fired) in China. The country which, according to recent data, produces more planet-contaminating pollution than every other country on Earth combined

So sending them our money to create more pollution seems counterproductive at the very least. But more troubling is that whole "slave labor" thing, which you'd think would bother those on the Left at least a little. But apparently they're only interested in slavery which happened in the distant past and can be used for current political leverage.

To be fair, the enslaved Uighurs who are making those solar panels at gunpoint shouldn't complain; the non-enslaved Uighurs are being systematically murdered in a sweeping genocide effort by China. Although if their bodies are properly composted, it's likely considered a successful "green initiative" and net win for the Earth by the AOC-Biden administration.

Here's an idea for the Democrats who are currently running the show in Washington: how about immediately implementing policy which prohibits billions of our tax dollars going to support slavery, pollution, and genocide?

Failing that, perhaps John Kerry can escort James Taylor to China to sing "You've Got A Friend" at a Uighur prison camp.

WARNING PAGE UPDATE: NONE SHALL PASS...

stilton’s place, stilton, political, humor, conservative, cartoons, jokes, hope n’ change, deceptive site, warning, fascism

For any who may have missed it (lucky you!) we had some excitement here on Friday. Readers coming to visit Stilton's Place were greeted with a heart-stopping red screen covered with exclamation points and human skulls and the warning that this is a dangerous, deceptive site, run by cyber-savvy terrorists intent on stealing your personal information, your life savings, and better scotch than we usually drink.

The warning came straight from Google and was, not surprisingly, complete and utter BS. Which we tried to make clear in a hastily-written email to everyone on our mailing list (which generated more email replies than we can even respond to, but all of which were read and greatly appreciated).

Further research showed that a lot of conservative blogs were getting the same roadblock, which made it look to be a pretty obvious "big brother" move targeting the Right. But it seems the warning also went up on liberal blogs, cooking blogs, dog grooming blogs, and every other kind of blog hosted on Google's "Blogspot" platform (as this blog is).

So it would appear that someone at Google Central simply flipped the wrong switch...and gave us all an important reminder that a flip of the switch is now all it takes to instantaneously cut off politically incorrect speech. 

For now, the problem seems to have been corrected, but that Sword of Damocles will continue hanging over our head here at Stilton's Place as long as the blog is hosted on Google's blogspot platform (we'll note that if you go to the archival Hope n' Change Cartoons site and/or try to do a content search, you'll get a similar warning that you can safely ignore). We'll be looking into alternatives.

But taking a glass-half-full approach (and trust us, ours usually is) this was probably a valuable reminder that all of the Hope n' Change and Stilton's Place posts (up through January of this year) can be downloaded in handy and totally free PDF ebook form using the links on this page. Get 'em while you can!