It Burns, Burns, Burns

Or maybe she was just splashed with Holy Water.

Just to be clear, we're not mocking anything about Ash Wednesday or the Catholic faith. If Nancy Pelosi wants to get ash-faced, it's certainly her privilege...and her sacred promise to give up something she loves for the 40 days of Lent will be good environmentally for the Earth, considering how many D-cell batteries she won't go through in that period.

But still, we find her public display of faith to be pretty much the ultimate in hypocrisy. This is a woman who proudly promotes infanticide, is an active obstacle to national security, and is a serial liar. And we're guessing that when she goes to confession, she has so many sins to confess that she has to pay staffers to recite all of the "Hail Marys" that she's racked up each week.

Among those recent sins is Speaker Pelosi's refusal to take a hard line condemning the blatant anti-semitism of new congressmuslim Ilhan Omar, whose anti-Israel rhetoric is actually supported by other blithering idiots on the left like AOC. Pelosi has made efforts to pass a nonbinding House resolution that members should probably pull back on bigoted hate speech, or at least try to curtail the amount of spittle spewing from their mouths while screaming invectives. So far, the other Dems aren't buying it because, hey, hate is fun! And the only source of Democrat power.

Of course, Nancy is far from the only politician to callously wrap herself in a religious facade while leading a life of spectacular immorality and straight-up evil.

But because of Lent, for the next 40 days we're forsaking the comfort we normally take in forgiving others for being scurrilous assholes, so we're calling her out.

BONUS: SPEAKING OF MAKING AN ASH OF YOURSELF...

Father Jolson sometimes got carried away.

FROM THE VAULT: THE SANDERS OF TIME...

Just a reminder that Sunday is Daylight Saving Time day, meaning that at some point in the middle of the night you should set your clock forwards or backwards by an hour - we don't really know which way and don't particularly care, other than to hate it. All we know with certainty is that we're going to have nausea and jet lag for the next two weeks, and it's the government's fault.

Expiration Candidates

If Cory Booker had hair, it should be standing on end about now.

Hillary Clinton has officially declared that she is not running for President in 2020, but says will take an active role by working with the candidates in the crowded Democratic field. In much the same way, we believe, that John McClane took an active role working with the terrorists at Nakatomi Tower.

Mind you, we do believe that Hillary has no intention of "running." This is, after all, a woman who has to pay heavily-muscled men to carry her up and down stairs when not dragging her limp body into a waiting getaway van after a public appearance.

But not for a second do we believe she's given up her all-encompassing obsession with becoming President. Rather, we expect her to maintain an active public profile while all the other Dems batter each other on the stump, after which she'll step out on the blood-soaked battlefield and graciously accept the "draft Hillary" movement which someone with no traceable connection to the Clinton Foundation has thoughtfully and generously funded.

Brain Drained

Don't worry, you're not failing to get the "joke" above because there basically isn't one. We just needed to fill some space today, liked the picture, and added what amounts to a non sequitur of a word balloon.

Oh, we THOUGHT about trying to make it vaguely relevant by calling the critter "Alpaca Ocasio-Cortez" who wants everything to take a hard turn to the left, but once we've called the beast an Alpaca, it screws up the double-l Llama joke. Who knew that comedy was both art and science?

All of which is way too much explanation (and an implied apology) for not having anything more substantive today. The "news" is just stupid and unsubstantial, as is pretty much always the case these days, and leaves us frustrated.

Meanwhile, it sounds like the Dems are going to have a supersized subpoena party, dragging in for questioning everyone Donald Trump has ever interacted with in hopes of building a case for impeachment. To which we say "fie upon them!" And we're not talking about fresh fie, either - but rotten, maggot-infested fie, mixed with sharp bits of gravel and thrown with considerable force.

Meanwhile, President Trump remains unbowed and just gave a two-hour barn burner of a speech which we didn't technically listen to, but in principle we're glad that he's still hugging the American flag and giving the Leftists hell. Which is what they so richly deserve.

Another reason we're not being very productive today (unless you count the phlegm still spraying about the room from our ongoing bronchial cough) is that we just finished doing our taxes, which always leaves us brain dead for several days.

Thanks to Trump's tax reductions (especially the increased standard deduction this year), there was no need for us to itemize every infinitesimal little transaction we made all year. Which, of course, we didn't know for sure until we'd fed every freaking receipt into Turbotax, and gotten a cheery computer message saying "Wow! You could have skipped all of this!"

Interestingly, our total net business income for the year came out to about $1200, yet at the same time, our Medicare payments have tripled because the government believes us to be members of the Evil Rich (based on returns from a couple years ago).

We choose to find this mildly amusing, especially after about three shots of Clan MacGregor. Which, by the way, is not the top choice of Scotch among the Evil Rich.

And with that, we'll shut up and throw the comments section open for YOUR observations about the news, the world, the weekend, or anything else you want to talk about. Someone throw us a lifeline here...!