Drawing a Blank

Amy Coney Barrett's confirmation hearings are going fine so far, assuming you consider it "fine" for a brilliant legal mind and outstanding human being to have to sit silently while a panel of politically motivated morons yap endlessly about why they think she's of low character.

In terms of actual legal knowledge, the Dems haven't been able to lay a glove on her. Nor have they been able to get her to respond to their baited questions about how she would decide imaginary cases in the future. So instead, the Democratic senators simply use their time making speeches about the millions who will die (from losing Obamacare) if Judge Barrett is sworn in, and the millions who won't die (from abortion) if she rules on Roe vs. Wade. Making us wonder why they can't make up their freaking minds about whether they're pro-death or anti-death.

The Dems are also using visual aids like poster-sized pictures of children with serious illnesses so that the great unwashed can see that the mother of seven (including two adoptees and a special needs child) has no empathy, despises children, and is quite likely hiding her investments in a company which sells child-sized coffins.

And no, we're not going to make a joke about RBG also having a child-sized coffin because it would be an appalling lapse of taste.

But not as bad as that of Democrat senator Mazie Hirono from Hawaii, who asked Barrett (in front of her children), "Since you became a legal adult, have you ever made unwanted requests for sexual favors, or committed any physical or verbal harassment or assault of a sexual nature" and "have you ever faced discipline or entered in a settlement related to this kind of conduct?" 

Barrett answered "no."

The answer to Hirono's final question, "have you ever blown Willie Brown?" was drowned out by an explosive spit take and coughing fit by committee member Kamala Harris.

A Fool and Your Money Are Soon Parted

Owing to our grueling schedule (it takes a surprisingly long time to make enough gruel to last all week), we're unable to post any 100% new content today but can assure you that there's also no 100% new news.

Which makes it a great time to swing wide the door of the Hope n' Change archival vault to remind everyone what an annoying, socialist tool Joe Biden is.

FROM THE VAULT: SHEKEL SHACKLES (Feb 27, 2015)

Joe Biden hosted a Black History Month event at his residence on Monday ("Try the hors d'oeuvres," he insisted, "They're all made with George Washington Carver's peanut butter!") and as usual ended up with controversial comments sticking to the roof of his mouth.

After years of hearing that taxpayers want him to keep his hands off their "cotton-picking money," Joe apparently came to believe that the money really is picking cotton, singing spirituals, and being held in slavery by the evil rich.

"This cannot stand!" Biden shouted at the invitees, nearly causing his stovepipe hat to topple. "It's not fair!"

"Business experts are saying that the concentration of wealth is stunting growth," Biden continued in a clear reference to former child star Gary Coleman, "So let's do something that's worthy of emancipation!"

Presumably, Biden's idea of emancipation consists of "freeing" money from the capitalist bastards who actually worked for it and using that liberated wealth for something much more important: the funding of the Left's vast, and nearly inescapable, vote-producing entitlement plantations.

Hope n' Change finds it sadly ironic, especially during Black History month, that when our nation got its first black president, he looked at all the possible contenders for vice president...and chose to pick a ninny.

Meanwhile at the NAACP...

The Flies Have It

For a disturbingly large number of people, the most fascinating thing about the recent Vice Presidential Debate occurred  when a large fly landed on Mike Pence's head and sat there for two hypnotic minutes. 

Pence seemed entirely unaware of the fly's presence despite the fact that it was putting on little skis and preparing for a downhill run across his snowy head of hair. Kamala Harris was definitely aware of the fly, and showed frustration at her inability to snap it up with her lizard-like projectile tongue owing to the stage's plexiglass barriers.

Okay, that part wasn't true. Probably. In reality, when Harris was asked following the debate if she'd ever had trouble with flies, she said "Well, I chipped a tooth once trying to open Willie Brown's."

But despite the amusing nature of this story, there is a growing undercurrent of suspicion that the incident wasn't as innocent as it seemed. Unnamed sources have spoken off the record to Stilton's Place and revealed that this was a deliberate and pre-planned attempt to embarrass Vice President Pence and that the man responsible had way, way too much time on his hands...