With immigration (and a possible invading army of Hondurans) much in the news, we think it's time for some sober contemplation of the larger issues and implications associated with weaving different nationalities and traditions into our great national tapestry.
Is assimilation an impossible dream? Or is America made better through the contributions of people from other parts of the world? We firmly believe in the latter proposition, if only in recognition of the great gift Polish immigrants brought to their new homeland: Dyngus Day!
Dyngus Day occurs on Easter Monday, and seems like an especially good idea to those whose Cadbury Easter eggs turned out to be full of liquor. Likely based on ancient fertility rituals, on Dyngus Day boys splash water on girls whom they find attractive and the girls, if similarly interested, tap their suitors with a pussy willow. Presumably, great merriment and a slew of new Polish kids ensue in the fullness of time.
In some sad backwaters of our nation, Dyngus Day still isn't celebrated with the same enthusiasm as other ethnic drinking holidays like St. Patrick's Day or Cinco de Mayo. Perhaps because restaurants and bars aren't sure if they can advertise a "Big Dyngus Party" without getting into trouble with the law or, perhaps, attracting an entirely different clientele than they were aiming for.
But in Buffalo, New York they do the day up right, complete with parades, polka bands, a competition for the much-coveted title of "Miss Dyngus," and festive Dyngus Day costumes like these...
For those of you with dirty minds, we should point out that the men in the picture above are actually dressed as pierogies - the traditional Dyngus Day pastry. Said pierogies may be stuffed with macaroni and cheese, sour cherry filling, or buttered sauerkraut...making each reach for an hors d'oeuvre a culinary game of Russian roulette.
Here at Stilton's Place, we think it's high time to give Dyngus Day the attention and respect it deserves. And if you don't want to take our word for it, just listen to what respected journalist (and Stormy Daniels Fan Club president) Anderson Cooper has to say...