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Monday, April 24, 2023

2:30 (Think About It)

johnny optimism, medical, humor, sick, jokes, boy, wheelchair, doctors, hospital, stilton jarlsberg, dentist, toothache, pain

No, I haven't forgotten which blog I'm working on, but there's considerable overlap at the moment. On Friday night (because of course it was a Friday night) I had a tooth suddenly go supernova on me. Since then I've been popping pain pills and antibiotics to try to make it to Monday, when I can hopefully see someone rather than just making a future appointment.

Ironically, the tooth in question should theoretically be incapable of causing pain owing to a root canal and a crown from an emergency dentist about 18 months ago when I was on hospital duty with Kathy. This person (I hesitate to use the word "dentist") apparently failed to do a complete root canal, put on the worst-looking crown I've ever seen, and then made it fit by drilling the top until she (oops!) made it down into the original tooth, making the crown useless. And did I mention the $4k emergency fee? But I was preoccupied at the time so let it go.

But that lack-of-quality workmanship has caught up with me and I'm enduring "Marathon Man" levels of pain about as enthusiastically as Dustin Hoffman did. And money be damned, I'm NOT going back to the emergency place to demand a do-over because I'd rather pay pretty much anything to pretty much anyone else to have the job done right. Although during moments of intense suffering, I have considered taking a more "hands-on" approach...

stilton’s place, stilton, political, humor, conservative, cartoons, jokes, hope n’ change, dentist, toothache, pain, white trash, trailer, pliers, beer

It's indicative of my situation that I've actually been looking up "do it yourself" videos on Youtube, and that even the one above seems appealing. I genuinely envy that lucky SOB with the beer.

And now, I've got to get back to the serious work of holding an ice bag on my face. I'll try to update this post later after I've either been to the dentist or a Home Depot.

MONDAY UPDATE:

My good dentist worked me in first thing this morning and confirmed that I've got infection due to the botched root canal the emergency person did. So I've got a referral to a specialist I've seen before (also good) at 4:15 to finish the root canal that the emergency practice only started. So now I've got a few hours to kill and will spend them packing that tooth area in mint chocolate chip ice cream.

SECOND UPDATE:

Aw, nuts. The specialist let me come in early, but not much good came out of it.  The x-ray shows that the emergency dentist left what might be a small amount of drill bit in the root of my tooth. So I was given the choice of getting a new root canal using a laser which might or might not clear the obstruction, or just pulling the tooth after which I’d need an implant. I said I’d rather do the root canal, but it turns out that if they attempted it and it didn’t work, I’d be in WAY more pain than I’ve been in so far and would have to schedule an emergency tooth extraction with some other practitioner. 

SOoo the strategy is to just give my antibiotics another 24-48 hours to bring the pain down, THEN try the root canal (for $2500 - and I’ll surely need a new crown on top of that). If the tooth was further back in my mouth I’d just have them pull it and be done with it. But since the tooth is visible when I smile, I don't think I should just leave a gaping hole there. Of course, it won't be a problem if I give up smiling, which seems like an easy enough option.  

At the moment, at least, I don't hurt. Because for my $300 specialist visit today, I got three numbing injections  (directly into my brain stem I believe) which should mask the pain until all the dentists close their offices for the day.

AND BY THE WAY...

How accurate was this prediction from last Friday?


In case you haven't heard, Tucker has been fired from FOX News and we now know (which he didn't) that Friday was his last show for the network. Sometimes I'm so good I scare myself.

33 comments:

JustaJeepGuy said...


Oil of cloves, @Stilt. Oil of cloves!

Julian said...

OMG OMG OMG OMG..... the words and images resonate within the caverns of my mind!!! I am so sorry you are going through that and pray that tomorrow ( Monday) will bring you relief. I actually ha a bad tooth one which had been aching until a Sunday afternoon when it gave way to throbbing and the soonest I could see the dentist was Friday. So I went in having used most of a bottle of aspirin held against the tooth, my face swollen and eyes bleary from no sleep. He shot me full of novocain, tugged and twisted until I heard the SNAP of the tooth breaking free of the roots, which he then excised piece by piece. Only that night. at home, did I realize he had pulled to=he tooth NEXT to the bad one... I was in such pain that I took everything I could think of, drank a pint of vodka and honestly tried knocking myself out by slamming my head into the door facing. My only salvation came from my dear old Dad who, by some connection of his brought me three tablets of Demerol. They kept me relatively pain free and allowed me to even sleep until I could see a DIFFERENT dentist Monday. I hope things go well for you, but just in case, maybe you want to use a Sharpie and mark the tooth ;o) Best wishes my friend.

Hyzenthlay said...

I'm close to that myself, so I'm glad to know they have DIY dentistry vids on YouTube. Did they say how many beers it would take?

Dan said...

I had a bad abscess a back in the '70s. Went to the local ER. Doc had me rinse it with a topical antibiotic we used at home for wound cleansing (can't think of the name right now, of course). Maybe rinsing it with mouthwash or vodka or similar?
Good luck. Ain't no fun.

Jerryskids said...

I agree with Dan - you don't necessarily have to swallow the vodka, just swish it around in your mouth as long as you can stand the burning. In my early 20's my wisdom teeth started coming in at a 45 degree angle and cracked the teeth in front of them. Had the teeth extracted late on a Friday afternoon and went home with a bottle of codeine. It wasn't until the novocaine wore off and I popped a couple of pills that I found out I have an adverse reaction to codeine. Had to gargle vodka and eat aspirin by the fistful until Monday.

Bobo the Hobo said...

I had not seen a dentist in 30 years when tooth pain drove me to make an appointment. During the examination he told me I needed a crown to which I replied, “I know, right!”

Hope the dental gods are kind to you and your tooth pain is resolved quickly.

Johno said...

Stilton, forget the oil of cloves. Go to your chemist and buy an over-the-counter retail bottle of NYAL Tooth-Ache Drops. A mix of benzocaine and an alcohol carrier. It’ll nail that sucker until your appointment, keep me rest of the small vial in your tackle box in case you need to remove an errant fish hook. It also helps when you’re removing a really stubborn deep splinter.

Maoz said...

So sorry to hear about your tooth-hurty, Stilt. (I thought about it.) Refuah shleimah umeherah! I wish you a speedy and complete healing!

Anonymous said...

Good luck. Tooth pain is something which cannot be ignored.

Gorgon Zola said...

What time does the Chinaman go to the dentist? Tooth hurty.

Baker52 said...

Hey good luck with that. Man you are right about the teeth somehow knowing to go bad at the worst times. Broke my first tooth (71 years old) last year, naturally it was on Wednesday night of Thanksgiving weekend. Had the same fun over the four day weekend that you just experienced. All the best today, and I hope your dentist has done it before!!

Anonymous said...

I also found out that root canals don’t always last forever… but mine lasted about 25 years before heading south. I was in the hygienist’s chair when she said “hmmm” and sent me to an endodontist; Caught it early and I avoided the whole pain thing. Good luck getting some relief today.

Colby Muenster said...

Beer? I say Everclear!

I hope you get it fixed, and soon. If there is a place to give an online review of the butcher who did your root canal and crown, you should do so. Dentists like that need to be led towards some other line of work.

I too, had a bad experience with a root canal and crown. In my case, the tooth went rotten, but gave no indication until it started moving around and putting out a horrible taste in my mouth (I'm sure my breath was delightful too). I ended up getting a bridge.

Keep us posted if you aren't in too much pain or too stoned on pain meds.

Anonymous said...

I’ve been going to a local, fancy-equipment dentist for regular exams and cleaning. They kept telling me that they could replace an ancient silver filling with a crown for “only” $1400. I finally had to tell a pushy little SOB that the filling in question was older than he was and, unlike him, was not a source of irritation.

Colby Muenster said...

@Gorgon Zola,

Boo! Hiss!

Fred Ciampi said...

My cousin went to her dentist for a bad tooth. ("Bad tooth, bad tooth"). The assistant sat her in the chair and the dentist walked in. As he bent over her with his bright light and assortment of tools she reached over and grabbed him by the scrotum. He gasped, straightened up and said "what are you doing?" My cousin answered "We're not going to hurt one another today, are we?" And they both went on to a happy, pain free day. The end.

TrickyRicky said...

Good luck today Stilton. Tooth pain is the worst and of course, like everything else, it seems to rear its ugly head as we get older.

I made the Marathon Man reference at Johnny's blog before I read your commentary here. Great minds reference great films I suppose.

Mesquite Country said...

A dentist or Home Depot!! What a choice! But apparently the "emergency" dentist was an idiot who couldn't be bothered to do something right. SO sorry for you. Hardly anything more painful than a bad tooth, but getting it out should certainly help. Let's hope you get a good dentist this time.

Brie Camembert said...

Hi Doc. Great sympathy on your tooth problem, and I hope it gets fixed PDQ. As to your original dentist, you have to realise that merit and skill are no longer important in today's USA.
As for me I'd tell every secret I know (and some I could invent) to be rid of a toothache.
BTW if the tooth is extracted, don't forget to put it under your pillow for the tooth fairy!

CenTexTim said...

What do dentists call the x-rays they take of patients' teeth?

Tooth pics.

mamafrog said...

You are making me cry in sympathy! And guess where I'm going Friday afternoon, and it ain't the ice cream store. One of my back molars decided to lose most of the filling and it also decided it needed to hurt like hell at the same time.

I finally decided I needed dental insurance worse yet because I thought I didn't have any, turns out I actually do and could have gone earlier to get it taken care of. Aaaaaaagh!! Better late than never to find how much it's going to cost I guess. I really, really don't like dentists. I'm going to one my daughter recommended, she's as bad as me about them so I trust her choice.

John the Econ said...

Ugh. Sorry you're going through this.

After I had my wisdom teeth pulled when I was 18, my sinuses got infected and I felt like my head was going to explode. Was the worst pain I've ever experienced in my life. I literally told my parents that if they didn't take me somewhere immediately, I was going to jump off the roof.

Hope this is resolved by the time you read this.

DougM said...

Long story just to be able to use the
"until you get the right tooth" punchline.

JustaJeepGuy said...


@Stilt, your update made my 2:30 for two reasons: I can't stand mint ice cream--chocolate chip or no, and my teeth are so sensitive to cold that they still hurt just from reading your update.

Shelly said...

Oh my! Where to begin? First of all, I had no idea crowns and root canals are so damn expensive now. Dental insurance is pitiful if available at all. I had stories like yours on several teeth. I spent a fortune on keeping my sorry teeth and lost all of them anyway, one by one. I tried an upper denture first and hated it. I've heard bottom dentures are worse because there's no suction involved. So the choice was made to get full mouth implants. It was a dreadful procedure. I was in the chair for over 7 hours with only mild sedatives. I was aware of everything done. The cost is prohibitive (I paid twice as much as my first house cost) but probably not worse than fixing teeth these days. All that being said, they are magnificent. At last I can smile and no more pain. Cleaning is easy with a water pik and toothpaste. I only go to the dentist once a year for X-rays (to see if they are still seated properly) and cleaning. They will stain if you're not careful. Whitening toothpaste and mouthwash leave a coat which deters coffee and tea stains. I can truly empathize with what you're going through. Teeth and mouth pain are the worst!

Le Petite Fromage said...

I read the 2:30 joke in Boys' Life magazine as a boy.

JRMD said...

"OUCH"... I feel for you buddy. So sorry.
I've experienced tooth pain and the pain
of dry sockets from 2 of 4 wisdom teeth
extractions, courtesy of the US Military.

DougM said...

Stilt,
I think Geo Washington still has you beat

Colby Muenster said...

It's your mouth, Stilton, but if'n it was me, extraction is the way. It's the only sure fire way to get that broken drill out, and you can get an implant to fill in the void. I'd almost bet this would be the cheapest method as well. Bottom line = hope you get it fixed soon!

Fox News just fired the only reason I watched Fox News. I hope this works as well for them as the Dylan Mulvaney thing worked for Budweiser.

Speaking of dysfunctional people, Slo Joe is running for certain, along with Princess Laughing Donkey. I'll bet Soros, Xi, Putin, Kim Jong Un, Ayatollah, and Baskin & Robbins are all celebrating today.

Rod said...

The 2:30 quick-start is hilarious. You have a unique mind.

And that earlier dentistry is absurd; they should be OUT of that business.

Anonymous said...

Best of luck with your tooth. Hope everything comes out alright.

mamafrog said...

And now I feel totally stupid, or my brain is numb from pain. I just now, at 10:06 pm Tuesday night, got the 2:30 joke. It's been a long week already and I'm not sure it's going to get any better, lol.

Freedom Monger said...

Well one thing I can tell you from first hand experience... don't double up on the pain meds. you'll end up on the laundry room floor looking like a 65 year old fish out of water and your kin taking pics for future reference