Wednesday, March 14, 2018

Un-sacred Cow

stilton’s place, stilton, political, humor, conservative, cartoons, jokes, hope n’ change, hillary clinton, india, deplorables, stairs, bitch, racism, trump

Okay, this won't go down in the annals of Stilton's Place as our wittiest punchline - but it's the best we could do without actually invoking language which would make a Tourette's patient blush or get us a visit from the Secret Service.

Because we didn't make up the horrible, anti-American crap Hillary is spewing in the panels above. In India to promote her book "What Happened," Russia's favorite uranium saleswoman launched into this tirade to describe the millions of troglodytes who voted for Trump as hateful, misogynistic racists who would actually have to improve to be Deplorables.

If this horrible woman had won the presidency, it seems very likely that every person who visits Stilton's Place would now be in either an internment camp (the lucky ones) or a cemetery (those who committed Arkancide). Because to paraphrase Sally Field, she "really, really hates us."

And frankly, Hillary, the feeling is mutual.


Fortunately, the Secret Cervix was on the scene.
While in India, an allegedly sober Hillary Clinton took roughly her millionth spill while trying to stumble down a simple flight of steps.

Despite her painful, legs-akimbo, "the baby is coming NOW!" position, medical experts have confidence that her vagina will be completely recovered should it decide to run for office again in 2020.


Regnad Kcin said...

After sliding in under the catcher's tag, the ump calls her safe at home.......

Keith said...

It would be interesting to know how her message was received by the average folks in India. I would be quite surprised if she could deliver without sounding bitter and nasty.

She’s A Beauty said...

I say a little prayer nearly every night thanking the Good Lord that this
disease-riddled, drug-addled Antichrist isn't in the White House.

M. Mitchell Marmel said...

Hillary, your fifteen minutes were up long ago. Go take some stair lessons and leave the rest of us alone, OK?

Geoff King said...

Well, at least we will never get to see her falling down the stairs of Air Force One.

Mike aka Proof said...

It seems that Hillary's inspirational message to the world is: "Poor people were too stupid to vote for me"

I predict that when Hillary dies, a huge granite memorial will be erected above her grave...just to ensure there's no way she could come back again!

REM1875 said...

She obviously slipped on the ice ................had nothing to do with the ice in her glass of booze ..........

REM1875 said...

@Mike aka Proof ......may i recommend a stake through the heart, removing the head and turning it upside down, filling the mouth with garlic and then jamming a paving stone in between the teeth ...... then the monument ..... Just to make sure .....

james daily said...

Looks like she was practicing Rosemary's third base slide. Ya think she will ever admit that the reason she lost is her? Nawww. Actually I love her doing these I really got cheated tours. Each and every time it lets folks know just how deranged she is. I doubt there is a person in the world that believes a word she says. Oh, those folks in India didn't voter for her either. She will not be running in 2020 as she can barely walk now - on flat surfaces. Maybe we should start a drop dead pool for her.

Mike aka Proof said...

REM 1875: You're going to need lots of garlic. Wonder if we could persuade them to bury her in Gilroy, CA?? (Home of the Garlic Festival)

Fish Out of Water said...

`Our "problem" is we the grubby masses have yet to see and acknowledge her "greatness" and her self directed sense of mission. Until we do.....

But I also see a marketing opportunity for the makers of Angostura Aitters. See a window to market a new product line, called 'Clinton Bitters'

Jim Irre said...

You know, if the Secret Service would just fumble the catch one time . . .

Doc said...

All we need is a simple wooden stake through her...OH DAMNITALL
..she doesn't HAVE a heart!WERE DOOMED to listening to her drain-bamaged, pathetic & insipid oral diarrhea ad nauseam.

Cat Whisperer said...

Didn’t you previously post that picture of Hillary coming down the stairs in the Earwig of March 7, 2018?

RDB said...

What is the point of her going to India? I know she was promoting her book but how many books can she really sell there? And the book has been out long enough, if they wanted it, they already bought it. Or is this just her way to deduct her vacation on her taxes?

Velveeta Processed Cheese Food said...

It amazes me that she even thinks people in India give a flip about her, or even know who she is. Those people have enough of their own problems without thinking about her.

SFO La Crosse said...

Is that the Electoral College? Hold me back!

Fritzchen said...

Hillary and herpes: The gifts that keep on giving
Thank god she is not my president except during a terrible nightmare!

John the Econ said...

"She hates us. She really, really hates us."

GMTA, because that's exactly the first thing I thought yesterday when I read the latest example of how she talks about people who can't afford to attend her speeches. Just more proof for my argument that during the '90s, the Clintons effectively converted the Democratic Party from that of FDR's "everyman" into the party of Marie Antoinette; the insular rich elite who have absolute contempt for everyone who is not them.

They can say what they will about Donald Trump, but they'll never convince anybody that he hates non-coastal, non-Progressive elite Americans as much as Hillary does. That is why he won. Coal mining and the steel industry are not coming back and deep inside, many of those rust-belt people know that. But at least they know that Trump does not hate them, whereas the Democrats actually do.

It's also proof that she didn't learn a thing from 2016. I really hope that she's still around in 2020. She's already well at work at sinking the mid-terms for the Democrats.

She’s A Beauty said...

@dragfree Now THAT'S comedy!

Andrew said...

REM 1975, It's good that some people remember the Old ways... But just to be sure, expose the body to full sunlight and bury the head and the body separately, separated by fast, constant moving water. And don't forget the Holy Water and Holy Oil....

Seriously, she was really stupid. As a former Secretary of State she should have known what happened to the last corrupt bitchy female politician that was in high office in India... Hmmm, come to think of it, that politician also was playing on name recognition from a male, hmmmm.....

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Regnad Kcin- The only thing Hillary knows about baseball is that her husband enjoys a good spitball.

@Keith- The message probably went over fine; it's not like Hillary is the only "world leader" who bad mouths our country.

@Section147- It is an unending blessing that we were spared this horrible woman.

@M. Mitchell Marmel- I think she should spend more time on escalators. Not only will she still fall, but we can enjoy seeing her rolled around for awhile.

@Geoff King- Excellent point!

@Mike aka Proof- I love the idea of the granite memorial holding her back. I'm thinking the inscription could be "Hillary Clinton - At This Point, What Does It Matter?"

@REM1875- Or maybe her prism glasses were on upside-down.

@James Daily- There IS a part of me that enjoys hearing her make all of the excuses, while never (to my knowledge) bringing up what actual qualification or vision she had for the office, other than peeing sitting down. And following Obama, even THAT wouldn't have been a first.

@Mike aka Proof- That would be a great way to publicize the Garlic Festival!

@Fish Out of Water- Exactly; we failed to see her greatness - ergo we're hateful idiots. And wow, "Clinton Bitters" is a great idea!

@Jim Irre- Considering the vile names she calls them, I'm surprised it hasn't happened already.

@Dr. Roger Harris- Where is Dr. Van Helsing when you really need him?

@Cat Whisperer- Excellent catch! Earwigs tend to be non-political, but now I really wish I'd been clever enough to throw a Hillary punchline in there.

Unknown said...

After reading all these comments , Maybe it wasn't all that Italian wine the old sot drank..

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Judi King- You'd think losing the election would be enough of a reality check. But nooOOooo.

@RDB- My guess is that she went to India because she still considers herself a player on the international scene (and, God help us, she probably is). Everything she does is about gathering and consolidating power, and finding strings to pull - no matter where in the world.

@Velveeta Processed Cheese Food- Perhaps the audience was told there would be refreshments served.

@JJ- Funny!

@Fritz Brohn- I think the herpes comparison is singularly apt.

@dragfree- I appreciate your sensitivity to social justice, but I felt I had to go with a gender specific insult owing to the fact that Hillary's candidacy was never about anything other than her genitalia.

@John the Econ- I have a host of problems with Trump, but I don't doubt that he loves this country and loves working class people. Qualities which Obama and Hillary never had (to put it mildly).

@Section147- Hey, who doesn't enjoy a good pratfall? Except, maybe, someone named Prat.

@Andrew- I'm pretty sure we should also make a circle of salt around her resting place, and keep armed guards on duty to ensure it remains unbroken.

Shelly said...

I hope that lying, corrupt, scheming, psychopathic harridan got an extreme groin pull. The only thing better would have been a hard face plant, knocking out her front teeth, breaking her nose and a major concussion causing a massive stroke. Too harsh? Not for me. I loathe that woman.

Colby Muenster said...

I truly and honestly do not understand this woman's thought processes. She apparently believes in her heart that she is a wonderful, caring human being, therefore anyone who did not vote for her must be either stupid or evil.

I'll second what Section147 said, and Stilton emphasized. We all need to thank God every day that this nasty, hateful, psychotic bag is not our President!

John the Econ said...

"She apparently believes in her heart that she is a wonderful, caring human being, therefore anyone who did not vote for her must be either stupid or evil."

@Colby, most Progressives honestly believe that of themselves. They "feel" their own "goodness", and therefore anyone who questions them or their real motives must be evil. It's the most evil sort of delusion. This is the sort of delusion that made Hitler & Nazi Germany, Stalin, and the long list of other evil leaders possible.

Unrelated but highly timely: This morning, countless schoolchildren left their classrooms to protest "guns", if not just "gun violence". As I am sure happened in most other towns, our local school administrators proclaimed that they would accommodate this "protest" and that there would be no personal consequences to individual students for walking out or being truant.

What these kids do not realize is that without personal consequence or sacrifice, their "protest" is utterly meaningless. At best, it's just cheap, vapid virtue signalling. At worst, it's just an excuse to get out of class for an hour. Some of these kids honestly think they're being Rosa Parks. Quite frankly, I have far more respect for the kids who refused the peer pressure to participate and stayed in class to actually learn something instead of being used by outside forces as "useful idiots".

Whoopie said...

If Stephen Hawking can die, why. can't. she?

John the Econ said...

From the "How can we miss you if you won't go away?" file:

It turns out that the Democratic Party and even many of her friends and supporters are not too thrilled about Hillary's ongoing book tour of bad memories:

Dems are angry over Hillary Clinton’s latest comments

"Democrats are angry that Hillary Clinton continues to discuss what went wrong during the 2016 presidential election against President Trump. Even some of Clinton’s own former aides and surrogates say the former Democratic presidential nominee should back away from the discussion about her failed campaign because it’s harmful to the party."

"In interviews with The Hill on Tuesday, even the staunchest Clinton allies as well as longtime advisers say the comments were cringeworthy and ultimately detrimental to Democrats."

In other words, if they want more Trump, this is how you get more Trump.

If you want to smile more, read the article linked above. While we're laughing, they're cringing, bigly. Still not tired of the "winning".

Rod said...

If the bitch is in India, there must be some crooked money to be made there somewhere.

As just a first easy step toward justice at her age and in her condition, I'd be pleased if she had to endure and try to survive the geriatric healthcare system the rest of us have to use. With both of my parents in their 90's. I'm learning new ways every week in which it's not so good.

james daily said...

Would the crook go to India because someone was behind on their payments to the Foundation? Just a thought.

American Cowboy said...

@ Whoopie

Mr. Hawking was a human...and Hildebeast is-a-she-demon?

REM1875 said...

"Or maybe her prism glasses were on upside-down"

Pretty sure it was few glasses she upside downed way or the other .....

Gee M said...

It's a clear case of that old Jewish proverb...:"Against stupidity, God himself is helpless."

We all have free will, and the Left seems determined to choose stupidity in all it's various be it.

Judi King said...

@ Shelly: do you REALLY feel?

Colby Muenster said...

Hillary walked into a bar carrying a pig. The bartender said, "Hey! You can't bring that snake in here!" Hillary said, "This is a pig, not a snake." Bartender said, "You butt out, I'm talking to the pig."

OK.... old joke, but I'll be here all week!

Gee M said...

OK...another old joke.

Are you a Democrat, Republican or Southerner?

Here is a little test that will help you decide.
The answer can be found by posing the following question:

You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children.
Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you.

You are carrying a Glock cal 40, and you are an expert shot.
You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do?


Democrat's Answer:

Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!
Does the man look poor! Or oppressed?
Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?
Could we run away?
What does my wife think?
What about the kids?
What does the law say about this situation?
Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?
Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?
Should I call 9-1-1?
Why is this street so deserted?
We need to raise taxes, have paint and weed day and make this happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.


Republican's Answer:



Southerner's Answer:

Click..... (Sounds of reloading)

Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?
Son: Can I shoot the next one!
Wife: You Ain't Taking That To The Taxidermist!

Gumby-damn-it! said...

Just me thinking... but wouldn't it be interesting as an alternative to Earwigs to post a photo from time to time like the one above of Hillary and seek tag lines in a similar manner?

Michael Macray said...

Leadership is about taking Responsibility. For YOUR decisions, their consequences, AND the actions of your subordinates.

Allocating Blame is the lowest form of Management, and often a sign of Incompetence.

HRC has never to my knowledge exhibited any of the characteristics of Leadership, or any sign that she understands what it is.

She continues, as always, to Blame others for her own Incompetence.

PvtCharlieSlate said...

... a quotation from the play The Maid of Orleans by Friedrich Schiller: "Mit der Dummheit kämpfen Götter selbst vergebens.", "Against stupidity the gods themselves contend in vain".

Friedrich Schiller was born on 10 November 1759, in Marbach, Württemberg, as the only son of military doctor Johann Kaspar Schiller (1733–1796) and Elisabeth Dorothea Kodweiß (1732–1802). ... Schiller grew up in a very religious family and spent much of his youth studying the Bible, which would later influence his writing for the theatre.

mystere's moonbat slayer club said...

I'm glad Crooked Hildebeest isn't President. One of my blog sites is dedicated to posting anything about her and her family members: The official name of it is Hillary Clinton Watch. I started it in 2016 in hopes she would lose big time. I hope you don't mind that I'm posting a link to this post on my blog. My main blog is Mystere's Moonbat Slayer Club. On several of my blogs, I have a humor piece on Chelsea Clinton's obsession on something I won't mention here. My team had fun thinking up the captions for it.