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Monday, December 10, 2018

The Sound of Muzak

stilton’s place, stilton, political, humor, conservative, cartoons, jokes, hope n’ change, sound of music, nazis, lisa mars, political correctness, New York, assholes

One would be hard pressed to come up with a way to actually improve the classic "The Sound of Music" (other than by adding singing zombies, of course). Yet Lisa Mars, the principal of a famous New York City performing arts high school, came up with a real doozy of an idea: she ordered the removal of all Nazi emblems and props from the school's presentation about a family running for their very lives from actual Nazis.

This overly sanitized version of the story would be puzzling at best. Rather than have Captain Von Trapp rip a Nazi flag in half, he might simply clutch a handful of Edelweiss to his chest and let loose with a primal scream. The oldest daughter's male love interest couldn't turn up wearing a Nazi uniform, but might terrify audiences showing up in a MAGA hat. And the crucial scene in which the singing Von Trapps are forced to perform on a stage adorned with swastikas would certainly have to be changed - perhaps having the fearful family held at gunpoint while appearing on the Mike Huckabee Show.

According to one student who is marginally more sane than the school's principal, "This is a very liberal school, we're all against Nazis. But to take out the symbol is to try to erase history."

We'll forgive the student for assuming that it's only "very liberal" folks who are against Nazis, and blame it on the bilge she's being exposed to in her "very liberal" school.

Ironically, a portion of the proceeds from the show are supposed to be donated to Holocaust remembrance groups...although it's pretty damn hard to show appropriate "remembrance" for history that's being actively erased.

Fortunately, the principal has been partially overruled by the New York City Department of Education, and a few bits of Nazi regalia will be included in the presentation after suitable trigger warnings have been issued, and smelling salts and fainting couches have been made available to audience members.

The beloved musical asks the question "How do you solve a problem like Maria?" but we think a much more important question is "How do you solve a problem like Principal Mars?"

45 comments:

She’s A Beauty said...

It writes itself, don’t it Stilt?

Mike aka Proof said...

The day that the Sound of Music would be rewritten for 21st century political correctness? I did Nazi that coming!

M. Mitchell Marmel said...

I think it's time for the Lisa Mars bar: Solid nougat, loaded with nuts.

REM1875 said...

Real Nazi's vs the media's narrative of what a Nazi is ??? I mean people might start asking uncomfortable questions (like what a land locked Austria needs a navy Capt for ???)
In a world where nazis need to be vague nameless shapeless figures who can fill in the blanks for today's evil... A real flesh and blood, well defined socialist monster becomes a little uncomfortable when we look too closely at it ...........

Eleazar Doulos said...

"How do you solve a problem like Principal Mars?" ....BY being a Nazi. Take her out into a field and shoot her.

Our society loves living in some mythical fantasy, where everyone who is bad is a 'Nazi' and all the 'good' people have no understanding of 'wrong' if it's not defined by the mob. The fickle mob defines 'good' and 'bad', without forethought and without consequences. Reality some day will come knocking on the door. Hopefully we'll be able to find the doorknob to open up the door.

Jim Irre said...

"Our society loves living in some mythical fantasy, where everyone who is bad is a 'Nazi' and all the 'good' people have no understanding of 'wrong' if it's not defined by the mob. The fickle mob defines 'good' and 'bad', without forethought and without consequences."

You've just described the basic premise of George Orwell's " Animal Farm."

Geoff King said...

As the left continues it's relentless assault on history and our language, reminiscent of Newspeak in that other Orwell classic "1984", one has to wonder where it will all lead. If certain words offend certain people, will all speech be monitored in the future and all communication be done through politically correct surrogate sources like Alexa?
How about multi-syllabic words? Could they not offend the "intellectually challenged"?
Perhaps our communication will be forced to devolve into simple stone age grunts and moans so as not to offend anyone.

Elbarto said...

“Every record has been destroyed or falsified, every book rewritten, every picture has been repainted, every statue and street building has been renamed, every date has been altered. And the process is continuing day by day and minute by minute. History has stopped. Nothing exists except an endless present in which the Party is always right.” - George Orwell, 1984

Gee M said...

Animal Farm 1954

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h1DcWw9geig

Judi King said...

Apparently George Orwell was on to something. He was just off about 30 years. Those who are not taught history will be amazed when it actually repeats itself. If they are aware enough to realize what the hell happened. We are at the mercy of stupidity and I don't know how to deal with it.








Kerry Soileau said...

Not to be a quibbler, but the Maria song was from West Side Story, wasn't it?

M. Mitchell Marmel said...

@Kerry: Two different Maria songs.

Sound of Music: What Do You Do About A Problem Called Maria?

West Side Story: I Just Met A Girl Called Maria

Although, the idea of a mashup, "The Story of West Side Music" does appeal, with songs like "Herr Offizier Krupke" and the Jets and Sharks facing off against the Nazis... ;-)

Gee M said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Gee M said...

Hogan's Heroes, the Musical.

Fred Ciampi said...

I don't know if I like the idea of civilization being reduced to just grunts and nothing else. That would make the Flintstones look futuristic. And never make eye contact. Then when the Aliens return they will find nothing but nothing. Unless, of course, some organized militia does the right thing and very soon. I think I'll shut up now ...

Kerry Soileau said...

M. Mitchell Marmel Ah, I see. I stand corrected. Like the idea of a rumble in Austria :)

Fish Out of Water said...

Excellent points above. I suppose taken to the extreme, this sort of "thinking" would result in some EU or UN pronouncement that what remains of the nazi death camps must be obliterated as they trigger.

A point about the Nazis that bears repeating. First they were socialists, a fact lost on American Nazis and one of the youngest, newest members of the House.

Second, Nazism and Communism are but two sides of the same political ideological coin. An ironic fact when so-called leftists/social justice warriors try tar those with the temerity to disagree with them.

All may also be familiar with another recent news story about another principal, in New England I believe, who tried to ban candy canes as inverted, they resemble the letter J = Jesus (it could also stand for 'jolly'), thus OMG, trigger! In this case, the principal was told to unbraid her brains.

How have we come to this? Believe part of the answer is there are and always have been, people with way too much time on their hands and overly active imaginations. The difference now being internet social media gives such people a world wide platform for their views, and as in this case, ridducle and correct.

Fish Out of Water said...

@Gee M Looking back now, I can't imagine a show like that ever being aired. There was nothing funny about being an allied POW either in Germany or under the tender mercies of
Imperial Japan.

Fish Out of Water said...

Very much off topic, but noticed this in one of my daily inbox items. With now Justice Kavanaugh on the Supreme Court, safe to say Planned Parenthood is a bit worried?

https://www.daybook.com/jobs/hjLWsLNZHSuwvHrw7

Tots said...

They completely miss the point of the Jewish pledge "Never again."

John25mm said...

I know it has been said before but would people quit asking "How stupid can you be?" they are taking it as a challenge.

The other bumper sticker saying that comes to mind right now is "I am not saying we kill all the stupid people. I just think we should remove all the warning labels and let nature take its course."

AmyH said...

Grunts & moans might offend "metoo" wackos.

Gee M said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Gee M said...

@ Fish Out of Water
Actually, MAD Magazine did a feature satire on just that...made quite an impression on me.

(1966,Hokum's Heroes)

Sgt.Schultze wasn't so cute after that...


I liked the ending of Stalag 17 when Peter Graves got his...mo better.

December 10, 2018 at 9:22 AM Delete

John the Econ said...

No Nazis?: Well, that's a head-shaker on several levels. As @Stilton points out, there really isn't much of a point to the story without the Nazis. Kinda like taking the "empire" out of Star Wars.

But even more curious is that of all the purging the left sees fit to do today, the last thing you'd think they'd eliminate is another chance to take a shot at the only politically correct target left today, the white male fascist? You'd think that they'd be looking for ways to make them even more evil, like their contributing to climate change or something.

And talk about the irony impairment to donating to Holocaust remembrance groups! Just wow.

But if you really want to make a statement and shake up The Sound of Music, why not make it relative to today's current events? I'm thinking of a singing Christian family in the Middle East being forced to flee their homeland that is being taken over by 21st century fascism. Nah. Nobody would get that.

Speaking of screwing with classics:

Casablanca live-read will turn the classic film into a lesbian love story

Ellen Page will slip beneath the fedora of Humphrey Bogart as WWII-era tavern owner Rick in a new live-read of the 1942 classic that will feature an all-female cast with an emphasis on LGBTQ performers.

I wonder who they will be replacing the Nazis with.

Geoff King said...

Lest we forget, even Daffy Duck hated Nazis:

https://youtu.be/0LgUPJG9eOE

Gee M said...

@ John the Econ

Surely Republicans...I'll bet in the spirit of Leftie Overkill they'll have Trump's picture on a wall with a Hitler moustache. Orange...

Geoff King said...

Need to share this as well. The left and biased MSM are flooding social media with a picture of Trump at Bush's funeral and he has his hands to his sides when everyone else had theirs on their hearts. What they refuse to show is moments before, as the casket was carried past the Predident, his hand WAS on his heart. This was a showing of respect. After the casket had passed, there was no longer a need:

https://media.gettyimages.com/photos/the-flagdraped-casket-of-former-president-george-hw-bush-is-carried-picture-id1068729802

Rod said...

I've just returned from a trip during which the winter storm in Carolinas closed intended Charlotte airport and forced a change to & through Ft Lauderdale-Hollywood Airport in the well known now Broward County, Florida. I had to kill ~15 hours at the airport to find, arrange, & make an early flight on home in time for minor surgery; which was completed as scheduled this morning.

This is the first time in many decades I've had to overnight at an airport (I'm getting way too old for that); and this was also in THAT location, AND in a new generation or culture. It seemed like everyone but me was totally plugged in. And this seems to fully occupy their head, hands, ears, mouth, eyes, and attention. On the aircraft as well.. it was much like a science fiction set where everyone but me is acting like a zombie under the control of some central power.

I had no problems; FLL is a nice airport; their were good people with which to interact (whether able to assist or not) but it is somewhat frightening to observe what is happening with our culture. Some folks sleeping there are not travelers, THAT'S WHERE THEY SLEEP. I now feel like the hero who had to get through the gauntlet (OH THE HORROR!) without the use the use of smart phone, full-time ear-bud phone, tablet, laptop, etc. nor pretty much useless 24x7 personal entertainment which it seemed like EVERYONE but me had with them and used full time.

Old Cannonballs said...

Just when you thought the stupidity of the left couldn't get any more insane... .

This is the world we're living in, folks. The crazies have taken over the schools (and the media and the just about every other damn thing) and indoctrinated the kids, and as those kids grow up -- excuse me, grow older -- IT'S ONLY GOING TO GET WORSE. Sorry, I think we're totally screwed. I'm going to go down fighting, because I won't give in to the bastards, but only an act of God at this point can save us. Or am I wrong? Tell me why I'm fretting needlessly. Go on... if you can.

Anonymous said...

They just keep getting dumber and dumber. Just when you think it can't get any worse... BLAM

NSF

Anonymous said...

'How do you solve a problem like the Liberals?'

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Section147- This one absolutely wrote itself!

@Mike aka Proof- I see what you did there.

@M. Mitchell Marmel- Good idea. They should also take away her Payday.

@REM1875- Exactly right. The Left doesn't WANT kids (or anyone else) to really know who the Nazis were or what they did, because then it would be a helluva lot harder to explain why that term is now being applied to people who lower taxes and don't believe in treating people differently because of their race.

@Eleazar Doulos- That is how Nazis handled a broad range of "problem" people. And you're right that the mob is now throwing around words without connecting them to reality at all. Which, historically, doesn't end well.

@Jim Irre- There's a reason that some books are classics. Now if we could only convince younger generations to actually read again...

@Geoff King- Who needs language to devolve to grunts and moans when we already have nice, safe emojis taking the place of words and thoughts?

@jpb252- That's one helluva scary quote. All the more so because our current electronic communications make it so easy to rewrite or erase history with a keystroke.

@Gee M- Wow, I had no idea the film version of Animal Farm was on Youtube!

@Judi King- I don't think the nitwits will understand that history is repeating itself, or their roles in making it happen.

@Kerry Soileau- As is pointed out below, there are two Maria songs. But you scared me! (grin)

@M. Mitchell Marmel- And let us not forget "They Call The Wind Mariah."

@Gee M- You know, they could actually make a showstopper song out of "I See Nothing!"

@Fred Ciampi- I wish the aliens would hurry up and return. Assuming they can give up their penchant for giving prostate exams.

@Kerry Soileau- I've actually heard worse ideas...

@Fish Out of Water- I came close to making today's post about the bonehead declaring that candy canes, when inverted, become "J's for Jesus." Some days, it's hard to choose which idiotic story to go with...

And I agree that "Hogan's Heroes" was a weird idea (and weird success). Why not a comedy called "Ausch Half-wits!" or maybe "Hit the Showers"? (Side note: Bob Crane, star of Hogan's Heroes, was an early adapter of using video to tape his wild sexual exploits and was eventually beaten to death with his own camera. A decent movie was made about it, called "Auto Focus.")

Regarding Kavanaugh and the Planned Parenthood situation, it turns out that he ruled in FAVOR of Planned Parenthood's position. I don't know why, but I'm sure as hell disappointed.

@Tots- Exactly. You can't say "never again" if you forget (or erase) what happened the first time.

@John Fernau- Regarding how stupid people can be, there's no bottom to that hole. And I really like that bumper sticker you mentioned!

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@AmyH- That being the case, maybe we should start grunting and moaning more. Then again, at my age I do those things just trying to get out of my La-Z-Boy (grin).

@Gee M- I don't remember that Mad piece, but will try to look it up. And I think Stalag 17 was almost certainly the inspiration for Hogan's Heroes, albeit much more serious (well, most of the time).

@John the Econ- To be clear, I think there would still be Nazis in the high school production - just no emblems, regalia, or swastikas. Which begs the question, which was actually worse: the Nazis or their design aesthetic?

And WOW, I hadn't heard about the all-female, heavily LGBTQ casting of a version of "Casablanca." How in the living hell is that supposed to work?! Do men even exist in the world they're depicting? Will there be LGBTQ Nazis? And when I read the phrase "love triangle" in relation to lesbians, am I wrong to wonder if they mean pubic hair?

@Geoff King- I was raised on wartime cartoons, with Bugs Bunny, Daffy Duck, Donald Duck and others killing German and Japanese soldiers. When looked at in the context of when they were made, they were great. And politically incorrect as hell.

@Gee M- I can't see how they can resist slipping in some digs at Trump.

@Geoff King- This is why I don't believe anything from the MSM anymore. Lying bastards.

@Sortahwitte- Well said!

@Rod- Seeing everyone plugged into their phones and tablets these days scares the crud out of me. And there was just a study released saying (unsurprisingly) that when kids spend a lot of time on these devices, it literally changes the way their brains work, particularly in the areas which need to develop to better enable interacting with the real physical world (and presumably other people). This can not end well.

@Old Cannonballs- I can't really argue with the point you're making, though I'm hoping some unforeseen change in the way things are going will turn things around. Then again, maybe I'm just whistling past the graveyard.

@Anonymous- It's genuinely amazing to see how the idiocy continues to reach new depths. It's like a fractal design with no real end.

@Anonymous- The same way you hold a moonbeam in your hand.

Gee M said...

LOL!
Very astute, Mr Jarlsberg.

The hilarious piece fed the reader into Colonel Hokum and Commandant Klink in the last 2 panels where they agreed they had to get off the hit show before multitudes of copycat shows killed it... Hokum said there was, by tv Network standards, an even funnier show...and there were 2 large panels on Hockman's Heroes, yukking it up in stripped pjs at the hilarious Auschwitz concentration camp...!
Naturally I downloaded all the panels, the brilliance of the Mad writers and artists has never been equaled.

Gee M said...

error! error! (cue Robbie the Robot, mechanical arms flailing frantically)

The camp was, of course, not in Poland but in Germany...it was Buchenwald.
Silly me. Much funnier...

M. Mitchell Marmel said...

@Gee M:

I must confess that when I first read those final two panels, I was only about seven or eight and didn't get the joke... Once I was older and more learned, those two panels became amongst the ones I remember best. I agree, sheer brilliance and, dare I say it, chutzpah!

Boligat said...

@Stilty wrote: "...perhaps having the fearful family held at gunpoint while appearing on the Mike Huckabee Show."

No guns, Stilton, instead they could use candy canes held sideways like guns (BUT not upside down:-).

Gee M said...

M. Mitchell Marmel

I was around 15 then, and in the final year of my Temple's religious school... my teacher was a gentleman (Judge Lee Ducoff) who was among the first American troops in some of the camps. He took some snaps, b/w with those white borders,and scalloped edges. Every family had those snaps of Uncle Bob and the family dog and birthday parties...these were of body piles, higher than the soldier's heads, piles of shoes and clothing...I grew up with my best friend's family around me, Polish Jews who made it out through the Warsaw sewers...the Mom and Dad both had the crude blue tattoos on their forearms.
I really got Mad's humor, many of the writers had Holocaust family victims, most likely ...6 million out of 15 million total Jews, the odds were good.

I loved their twisted take on everything!

M. Mitchell Marmel said...

@ Gee M: (rather grim nod) I can, as they say, dig it. You see, the family name, before my father Anglicized it, was Marmelstein. I estimate about 75% of my father's relatives perished in the Shoah. My father's parents, however, beat feat out of the part of the Russian Empire that became Poland just before WW1 broke out; at that, they were most fortunate.

One can either be bitter, or one can laugh. Me, I choose to laugh, and that's why I loved MAD humor of that era so much.

M. Mitchell Marmel said...

*beat feet. Sorry. Though it was a pretty good feat; Abraham and Dora made it into the states shortly before the gates slammed shut for Jews in the 1920s...

B.C. said...

Taking the Nazis out of The Sound of Music is on the same level of Galactic Stoopid as taking the Romans out of the story of a certain Jewish carpenter. Just when you think Leftist assweasels can't push the bounds of the Singularity o' Stoopid any further, they go and squeeze in more steaming bovine excrement into what, in any other universe, would be an impossibly-packed point in the space-time continuum. Einstein and Hawking, working in concert, couldn't figure it out, even with a thousand chimps banging away on a thousand supercomputer keyboards.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Readers- I'm a huge fan of Mad Magazine (at least, the early days). Absolutely a significant factor in my own sense of humor. And all of this talk has reminded me that I've overdue to go back and re-read some of that stuff!

Gee M said...

addy for Hokum's Heroes

http://hofbrau.freeservers.com/mad.htm

M. Mitchell Marmel said...

@Gee M: Given the BDS movement on the left, we have plenty of anti-Semitism to go around as well... :P