Monday, April 22, 2024

A Biden In Every Pot

stilton’s place, stilton, political, humor, conservative, cartoons, jokes, hope n’ change, biden, uncle bosie, cannibals, dementia, liar

To paraphrase a very old joke, a young cannibal boy once sat at the dinner table and said "I don't like Biden." To which his mother said "Then just eat the noodles."

In this case, according to a heartfelt speech recently given by Joe Biden, the main course might have been the president's beloved "Uncle Bosie" who was a heroic World War II pilot whose plane was shot down (or perhaps speared) causing him to crash into cannibal territory in New Guinea. The savages ate every bit of him after first forcing him to watch erotic native dancers so there would be "more meat."

None of this happened the way Biden said, of course. His uncle, who was in the service, was a passenger on a military plane that had engine failure and subsequently ditched in the ocean. And that was the end of Uncle Bosie. You'd think that giving his life in the service of his country would be story enough for little Joey (he was 2 years old when it happened) to be proud of, but Joe just had to embellish the story to the point of utter ridiculousness. 

White House press secretary Karine Jean-Pierre, who is in no way related to any flesh-eating tribespeople, found subsequent questions about the cannibal story to be tasteless. Presumably, unlike Uncle Bosie.

But as long as Uncle Joe has put the subject of cannibals on the table, so to speak, it seems an appropriate time to revisit a fond memory from my politically incorrect youth. I loved watching "The Little Rascals" and no episode made me laugh harder than the mistaken-identity romp, "The Kid From Borneo." I assume that there are many here who will remember that episode, which is why I've used AI to create this (suddenly topical) song about the chaos that occurred when "Uncle George" came to town.

And as long as I'm trotting out my AI songbook (seriously, I just can't force myself to follow the news closely these days), here's another little toe-tapping tune that only took me about 30 years to create. Back then, I got the chance to meet a famous cowboy vocal group and pitched them an original song that I thought would fit nicely in their catalog. They politely declined which is hardly surprising, considering that I can't play any instruments and so just had to sing a cappella on a cassette that I may or may not have recorded in my sound-enhancing bathroom shower.

But thanks to the miracle of AI, which is willing to play with us a bit longer before taking over, I finally brought the 30-year-old song to life this week (along with AI generated visuals - though I still had to do a bunch of video editing). It's not politically relevant (assuming that Biden didn't also lose a beloved uncle in a cattle stampede), but I think it's a good idea to kick off a Monday with a toe-tapping cowboy tune anyway!


Mike aka Proof said...

Biscuits and Beans... sounds a lot like Toby Keith's posthumous album!

Anonymous said...

so, are you working on a Broke-Back verse for the Biscuits and Beans song? All those beans could add a whole new dimension

DarkwingDave said...

I know it was all intended in fun. You might want though to look up Kent Rollins who still is a cattle drive 'Cookie' and has a lot of videos on cooking on the trail. Love the videos and the Biden commentary as always

JustaJeepGuy said...

Regarding Gropey Joe, I had a scary thought: the Demo_Rats' desperation play for the election. What if, after they get Gropey Joe to a debate (we know they'll try not to let it happen) and he loses so badly even Kamalatoe can see it, the Demo_Rats suddenly find that there's evidence that mistakes were made in counting votes or something in 2020 and they declare that President Trump did actually win the 2020 election. Since he really did win, he is prohibited by the 22nd Amendment from running again so he has to quit the race.

I know it's highly unlikely the Demo_Rats would admit Gropey Joe lost in 2020, but if there's a possibility of keeping Trump from winning again, they'll try anything at all.

Julian said...

Good lookin' biscuits!!!!! Yum yum, eatemup!

Dan said...

White House press secretary Karine Jean-Pierre, who is in no way related to any flesh-eating tribespeople

I wouldn't jump to conclusions. Isn't she from Haiti? Isn't Haiti's current revolutionary leader of their country called "Barbecue?"

Richard DeVito said...

81 years old and the moronic dementia ridden cadaver has absolutely ZERO accomplishments that he can fall back on to enhance his current life stories, aka, bullshirt.
Corn Pop was a mean dude.
His father said Joey this and Joey that.
After attending daily morning mass at Mary Mother of Misery, he ran around the corner to the local black church.
Of course, the reason he got left back in third grade was because he was late for school every day because after attending the black church, he joined all of the Puerto Rican kids at the local synagogue.

Fish Out of Water said...

Is there a descriptive term in the English language which goes beyond the meaning of 'bald-faced liar'? Perhaps a new term to describe such liars will work its way into our lexicon, like 'He's/she's an unabashed Biden'.

Xoph said...

Outstanding graphics for Biscuits and Beans. I especially like the dessert.

Brie Camembert said...

Loved the Biscuits n Beans video. Reminds me of the farting scene in "Blazing Saddles"
BTW is Joey now just an AI construct? Just askin'

Oldarmourer said...

In a fit of unimaginable coincidence, I dug the bean pot out before sitting down to read some comics to try and lift my spirits a little before going out to get the taxes do you DO that ?

Neighbor Dave said...

Well ding dang it, them beans look awful laripin', specilly with that there hardtack! Makes a feller want to get up and do a jig!

VideomanSS said...

Yee Haa Biscuits and Beans. Great way to start the day. Thanks Stilton.

TrickyRicky said...

I kept imagining chunks of the uncle floating in the beans, along with the bacon....maybe it will be BBQ for lunch today.

M. Mitchell Marmel said...

Uncle Bosie, biscuits and beans-it's what's for supper!

Bosie-the other OTHER white meat! ;D

Feraldog said...

I read that Jell-O Brains Uncle crashed as a passenger into the ocean. I guess that cannibals have Seafood Fridays too.

Joe Drypowda said...

Still laffin'! Please, PLEASE don't ever lose your creativity or humor. We'll be talking about ol' Joe long after he's committed, maybe to the Senate again.

John the Econ said...

Biden & his delusions: Can you imagine the feast the media would have with this clown if there wasn't a (D) anywhere near his name? I wonder how many people in the MSM media silently hate themselves because deep inside they have to admit to themselves that another Trump term is the only think that is going to keep many of them employed for another 4 years? I can't wait for the spectacle of the "fact checkers" who have been in hibernation for the last 4 years re-awakening.

taminator013 said...

The first thing that came to mind when I heard Biden's ridiculous story was my favorite Little Rascals episode. Colorized clips from it were used in the song.

Mad celt said...

Thank you! My favorite Our Gang short. Haven't seen this in ages.

Lee The Voice said...

Love Biscuits and Beans. If I were still doing country music radio, I get in trouble with my program director, and play it on the air.

Anonymous said...

I can imagine hearing ‘Asleep at the Wheel’ performing that little ditty!! Loved it!! You outta pitch it to them…. SERIOUSLY.


Oldarmourer said...

I'd kind of like to see Rascal Flatts take a crack at it ;)

Pissing off the PD is one of the perks of the job :)

Gee M said...

Well, I remember the LRs/Our Gang shorts when I was little and they were old; loved them! Just 'cause'a you I went out and got that one and 4 others... not colorized though.

DougM said...

Yum yum, eat 'em up!
That episode was my favorite:

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Mike aka Proof- High praise.

@Anonymous- So you think the song should be more in tents? (pun intended)

@DarkwingDave- The song was done with love in my heart for the cowboy mythos and the great cowboy singing groups.

@JustaJeepGuy- I don't think the Dems could suddenly declare that Trump actually won last time and get away with it. After all, even if Trump "won" he was never sworn in, so he definitely hasn't served a second term. Yet.

@Julian- They ARE good looking, aren't they?

@Dan- I'll admit that I'm giving her the benefit of the doubt.

@Richard DeVito- I like the way you've pulled these various versions of Biden's youth together. He was a member of every group and ethnicity all the time. He is (I pause to dab a tear) America.

@Fish Out of Water- How about making the new word "Truthraper?"

@Xoph- The funny thing is, that dessert looked pretty good to me!

@Brie Camembert- I think if Joe was an AI construct at this point, it would look more believable than the mess we're seeing.

@Oldarmourer- It's the miracle of synchronicity.

@Neighbor Dave- Ain't nothin' sissified about doin' a jig!

@VideomanSS- A little trail dust is good for the soul.

@TrickyRicky- I'm now imagining a bunch of cannibals holding their noses while accusing one of their buddies of "cutting a Biden."

@M. Mitchell Marmel- "White Privilege" would be a good name for the cannibal equivalent of "Hamburger Helper."

@Feraldog- It was a surf n' turf special.

@Joe Drypowda- Thanks for the kind words. Creativity and humor are what keeps me (mostly) afloat these days.

@John the Econ- If Biden was a Republican, you'd see pussy-hatted Democrats storming the capitol to drag him off to the looney bin. And when it comes to fact-checkers these days, I trust them less than I do Anthony Fauci.

@taminator013- For those of us in a lofty age group, I'm sure that "Yum, Yum - Eat 'em up!" sprang to mind immediately when Joe shared his tale of woe.

@Mad celt- It's still great, isn't it?

@Lee The Voice- You flatter me, sir!

@Bobo- I'd love to have a real band pick up the song. I wonder how a person goes about marketing such a thing? Mind you, I'm already a member of BMI and I just registered the song, so I guess it could be a doable thing.

@Oldarmourer- Back in my radio days, it was always fun to slip an unapproved song into the rotation and see if you could get away with it.

@GeeM- I have so many favorite episodes. I'll have to track some of them down!

@DougM- That episode may have been EVERYONE'S favorite. It was a simpler time.

JustaJeepGuy said...

@Stilt, the 22nd Amendment just says "No person shall be elected to the office of the President more than twice..." Actually holding the office is not a condition of the amendment. I think the Demo_Rats ARE evil enough to try it if their lawfare against President Trump fails.

Colby Muenster said...

I'm at work, so can't play the videos... bummer. I shall watch them later at home.

I really like Jon Lovitz, and he's one of very few Hollywoodish types that isn't a moonbat, but I always think of his SNL "liar" character when Gropey Joe spews out one of his demented whoppers. "Yeah... that's the ticket!"

Oldarmourer said...

@Oldarmourer- It's the miracle of synchronicity.

I preferred 'Synchronicity 2' but hardly anyone listens to the lyrics ;)

Pissing off the PD was a team sport in most stations I was at, we had prizes :)

I got more than one song that wasn't on the 'official' playlist into the top ten before most other stations picked up on it :)

Oldarmourer said...

At one station the hourly rotation called for one 'country' song along with the usual top-ten, oldies and 'free choice'.
I announced "it says here I have to play a country song, I choose...Sweden !!" then put on an Abba cut ;)

Oldarmourer said...


I'm not American, but I've always wondered about that.
As I understand it, the VP can be appointed not elected and move into the Presidency as required...there doesn't seem to be anything stopping each subsequent 'elected' Dem VP from stepping aside then have 'bama appointed as the new VP then the President stepping aside to make him President...over and over and over again...I'm thinking the only reason they haven't done it is because they haven't had solid enough House/Senate majorities to ensure there's no legislation passed to override it and like here they always build in loopholes only they can use.

JustaJeepGuy said...


It's a Constitutional issue and legislation doesn't trump the Constitution. Of course, the Demo_Rats don't consider themselves constrained by that, but I doubt they could get away with running Barack Hussein as VP. The Presidency is the big prize and anyone elected to that position would be highly unlikely to willingly give it up, even if he had a "deal" with Barack Hussein beforehand. I wouldn't put it past the Demo_Rats to try, though.

I say that legislation doesn't trump the Constitution, but the weasels in Congress did put one over on the citizenry in regards to the 27th Amendment. That one was proposed in 1789 or so along with the first 10 Amendments which became the Bill Of Rights, but it wasn't ratified until 1992. The 27th says that if Congress passes a law changing their compensation, they can't collect that new compensation until after the next election (the idea being that the voters would not re-elect people they thought did a bad job and didn't deserve a raise). So the crooks passed a law that makes their pay raises automatic and they have to vote against any new pay raise. I understand that there are a few (VERY FEW) who have voted against those automatic raises. Someone should have sued to get that law thrown out, but nobody has.

Anonymous said...

Interesting, we've had instances of people being appointed Leader of their party and technically becoming PM, but they can't sit in the House unless elected so generally someone in a 'safe' Riding gives up their seat, for an undisclosed 'consideration' since that would be illegal ;) and an immediate By-Election is called which the Opposition traditionally doesn't contest much if at all during the campaign but liebrals have been known to ignore tradition unless it favours them...

Oldarmourer said...

Our leader of the ndp party, our even more socialist than the socialist liebral party, who really runs the gov't since the liebrals are in a minorty gov't and need his votes to stay in power just tweeted that nobody should be allowed to access any sort of private health care because "that ideology is dangerous to Canadians health"

Love the answers he's getting, this one in particular. Others have reminded him that his predecessor went to the US for surgery and WE paid for it at the same time he was pushing for a law to forbid any sort of private clinics from opening that the public could access.
So painfully full of it. Right now in BC the NDP is sending cancer patients to private clinics in Washington State. Numerous NDP cabinet ministers have used the private Cambie Street Surgery Centre, which was established at the urging of the NDP in order to allow union workers to avoid the public system wait lists.
As an MP you join federal prisoners, military and RCMP in using private clinics - as did former CAW (Canadian Auto Workers) head Buzz Hargrove to get knee surgery in a week in a private clinic while the average Cdn waits over a year in the public system.
17,032 patients died waiting for diagnostic scans and surgery in 2022-23 - but not one connected politician. They don't wait b/c they use private clinics.
Your ideology is dangerous to Cdns health.

JustaJeepGuy said...

Oh c'mon, Oldarmourer, just ask the Demo_Rats here and they'll tell you that the Canadian health care system is SOOOOOOOOOO much better than what we have here! Britain's national health service is even better than that; Hitlary Clinton will vouch for it!

All Demo_Rat politicians here will look down their noses at you and say in a tone of sneering condescension, "You need to do what I say, because I know what's good for you!"

M. Mitchell Marmel said...

New StiltonSong™!

Funny and touching. :D

JustaJeepGuy said...

Stilton has been making a lot of new songs! "Nobody's Perfect", "Something's Alive", "Ten In One", "Demon's Lullaby" are all songs I hadn't seen before. It would be pretty cool if Paul Simon were to see some (or all!) of these. "Work With What You Got" is particularly Simon-ish, IMO.

Alfonso Bedoya said...

Stilt: Not to worry about the physical/mental limitations. I hope they are only temporary. I suffer from the same types of annoyances, but brush them off due to so-called "advancing" age (almost 87). My main gripe is short-term memory problems and lower back pain due to too much yard work involving picking up twigs blown off our oak trees.

I have given up on previous medications supposedly guaranteed to provide cures for such nonsense, but in fact haven't seemed to provide any relief. What has worked, however, is a complete boycott of any of Biden's national speeches on TV. It's been almost as effective in the "peace of mind" department as a couple of Margaritas poured over ice.

Anyway, I send my prayers and best wishes to you, and don't fret if you have to cut back on your posts.
Anything you send is appreciated.