Friday, February 9, 2018
Senate Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi just set an official record by flapping her yap for over 8 hours (and 2 adult diapers) on the subject of why legal citizens should get nothing in the budget if illegal aliens aren't allowed - indeed, encouraged - to remain in our country.
In fairness, the majority of those illegals work hard during their annual, back-breaking harvest of taxpayer-funded entitlements. And let's not forget that you can't be a Dreamer without taking time for siestas.
It is thought by some that Ms. Pelosi chose to speak so long in order to quell growing rumors that she is suffering from senile dementia. It is thought by others that her remarks ran so long because she kept forgetting her place in what should have been a 20 minute speech and kept starting over again.
All we know is that Nancy has, once again, set a record which will always be enshrined in the hallowed annals of the STFU.
BONUS: LAST TANGO IN PRYOR
To be clear on the subject, Stilton's Place is still Gay friendly and relatively non-judgmental about relationships between consenting adults in which no one gets hurt. Unless, of course, that's what turns them on.
Still, the news that groundbreaking comedian Richard Pryor and mumbling blob Marlon Brando were lovers is just a little more than we can take without reaching for a stiff drink and then immediately regretting our use of the word "stiff." Also, remembering Brando's "Last Tango in Paris," we don't expect to be using butter again for a long, long time.
What bothers us isn't so much their proclivities, which are none of our business, but rather that hearing Pryor and Brando's names jammed together in this context puts specific images in our head that we don't want to have. In much the same way that we don't really want to imagine the bedroom bliss of entirely heterosexual luminaries like Danny DeVito and Rhea Perlman.
Then again, maybe we're just upset because the damn stock market is still plunging, so we're more than a little sensitive about any subject related to taking it up the poop chute.
Posted by Stilton Jarlsberg at 12:01 AM