Monday, April 8, 2019

The Black New Deal

stilton’s place, stilton, political, humor, conservative, cartoons, jokes, hope n’ change, AOC, negro dialect, black, al jolson, hillary, dolezal, obama
So, New York 14th District voters - how does it feel to pick a ninny?
Although we hate giving dimwits more time in the spotlight than they deserve, AOC has once again offered us too tempting a target to resist.

Specifically, she has entered the ranks of those political figures who suddenly lapse into a broad Amos & Andy dialect when talking to African-American audiences in order to seem more "black." Interestingly, this overtly racist affliction only seems to strike liberals, with notable victims including Hillary "Ain't No Ways Tarred" Clinton, Rachel "Of Course I'm Black, I Committed Welfare Fraud" Dolezal, and Barack "I Was Raised in a White Community by White Communists Who Fed Me Fluffernutter Sandwiches" Obama.

In this case, Ms. Occasionally-Colored was addressing a predominantly black audience when she was suddenly overcome by the urge to speak in a southern drawl seasoned with just a soupcon of Ebonics. Reacting to President Trump's dismissal of her as a "bartender," she defended her former (and future) profession by declaring "Ain't nothin' wrong wid dat!" while waving jazz hands.

She then further demonstrated her deep understanding of black culture by assuring them - still in Stepin Fetchit mode -  that there was nothing wrong with their holding jobs like "folding clothes for other people to buy," or "preparing the food that your neighbors will eat," or "driving busses." In fact, it seems like there "ain't nothin' wrong wid dat" about any kind of manual labor for black Americans, as long as they leave all the fancy thinkin' jobs to the progressive massahs in charge of the new plantation state.

Of course, part of that fancy thinkin' by the Leftists is to flood our country with so many illegal aliens that the humble, but thoroughly respectable, jobs she listed will be out of reach to those in black communities who were hoping to enter the job market and start climbing the economic ladder.

Still, if they vote the right way, there will always be a trickle of cash heading their way from Washington.

But there ain't nothin' right about it.


Bruce Bleu said...

If dey wonna keep huh fum makin uh ass uh huhsef, dey need tuh put huh away and put a "Massa" lock own de doh!

j said...

Sadly, the TV version was edited. They carefully omitted the portion in which she tap danced across the stage, wearing a watermelon shell hat, juggling chicken wings and packets of hot sauce, while singing Hey Lawdy Lawdy, de Massah's Gone Away!

Anonymous said...

You mean dat wrong to say, massah? I dun thought it was okay to talk that way. That Ebonics is cool damn talkin', ain't it? Besides, I gets my point cross betta when I talks that way to dis crowd.

If this was a Shirley Temple movie when she was dancing up the stairs with a black dancer, it would be cute. America Often Cries (AOC) will never get it right enough. Sheeze, who's training her to say this stuff? You know they aren't launching her to the American people without some kind of training in, well, anything that requires common sense and a grasp of the correct way to speak English that will make you maybe sound intelligent. Of course, anything to due with economics, government, laws, debating, oh, hell, she doesn't know much about anything except maybe mixing a Margarita. Her handlers must be cringing.

sergio said...

Just ignore AOC and she will vanish POOF!, not unlike Antifa has done gone away

Jim Irre said...

@sergio, not sure it will be that easy to get rid of this fly in the ointment. She has Hillary, Jr. written all over her. The Progs are enamored enough with her that they'll make sure the Podesta's of politics start steering that ship of fools.

Fish Out of Water said...

My money is still on her being a one and done MOC. Constituent service is what keeps a MOC in Congress and starting with her self proclaimed role in throwing a poo-filled balloon on Amazon, I'm guessing she's self-deluded enough she believes her progressive aura will still get her re elected.

Personally I'm still chuckling over the public scalding she deservedly got recently in being called out as economically illiterate. A comment by Lucy on that would make this Monday near perfect.

Speaking of perfect, and worthy of another Hope n Change reprise, the worst electoral mistake since the peanut farmer from Plains Ga and pop Marxist, in a talk in Germany, said something to the effect Europe has reached the pinnacle of perfection. Hmmmm.

Geoff King said...

A recent study done by the psychology departments of both Yale and Princeton found that white progressives in all walks of life do commonly "dumb down" their use of the English language when speaking to blacks, whereas white conservatives do not:

Fred Ciampi said...

What surprises me are the folks who take no offence at being mocked by such politicians. I see it as a sign of being talked down to.

WDS said...

Pick a ninny

I see what you did there....

Rod said...

Re the video: I've not actually LISTENED to AOC; maybe less than a minute or two all total. My goodness she is irritating. She also strikes me a bit more than when many other politicians often say something with which we can all agree and think they are leading & being profound. I suppose it's because there's also an air of being uneducated & ignorant there; but maybe not stupid because she got herself elected. NY Dist 14 is stupid. It's just sad.

Murphy(AZ) said...

When I saw the video of AOC doing her wannabeblack routine, I immediately flashed back to HILLARY! (reg tm) when she tried it.

It took me half a bottle of Bushmill's to get past it.

I think today I'll watch the re-runs and finish the bottle.

M. Mitchell Marmel said...

"Occasionally Colored". Hee! You're welcome. ;D

TrickyRicky said...

MAGA - Make Alexandria Go Away

Can't take credit, but I do like it.

kcmoonshiner said...

Reminds me of Barbara Billingsley in Airplane! "Excuse me, I speak jive!"

james daily said...

This Occasionally Colored gal is driving nitwit Pelosi insane. She can't disparage President Trump because AOC is already up staged her. Actually, kinda fun to watch.
As far as AOC's ignorance that knows no bounds, it boggles the mind that a lot of the unwashed believe in her and think she is the first coming of the Messiah. So far not one idea from this ignoramus is possible.

Tots said...

She and her followers online are insane. I mean the literal definition as well.

I have some "Friends" who enjoy making fun of her constant gaffs online and the response from "People" who follow her is usually fast and furious. The word "People" is in quotes because they are accounts that are filled with retweet after retweet from AOC's account. In their eyes she can do no wrong and anyone who dares point out her statements are not thought out or stupid must be destroyed.

I don't see a way out of things. It seems very few discuss issues and solutions and longer, it's all, "My side is good and perfect while your side is nothing but evil."

What happened to having different ideas on how best to guide our country? I honestly can't see the "Ideas" from the Democrat leadership doing much, if anything, to improve America. On the flip side the Republican leadership refuses to cut our out of control spending and is the (slightly) lesser of two evils.

rickn8or said...

sergio, AntiFa hasn't gone away; they're doing workups for deployment in the Summer of 2020.

Shelly said...

@James Dailey, Pelosi has found herself painted into a corner with AOC and the other radical freshmen. She knows they were most likely responsible for the Dims retaking the House and her getting to be Speaker again. While she may abhor the antics, she knows her political future depends on them. Sucks to be her!

Fritzchen said...

As Tots pointed out, "She and her followers online are insane." Unfortunately, in the land of the insane, the sane are the ones placed in asylums ...... or worse.

Jim Irre said...

She learned that from her beaver! 🤣

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Bruce Bleu- Okay, you claim to be Bruce Bleu, but we know it's you, Hillary.

@j- I'm sure the content was only edited because of time constraints.

@Anonymous- I'd hope her handlers are cringing, but are they? After all, this sort of minstrel show usually works pretty well for the Dems.

@sergio- I TRY to ignore AOC, but I may have to enter a 12-step program.

@Jim Irre- I'm not sure how soon we'll be rid of her either. Sheer idiocy is no longer an impediment to elected office (assuming it ever was).

@Fish Out of Water- I hope you're right. AOC got to Washington and clearly thought of herself as a national figure rather than a representative of a single district in New York. A district which could have used the megabucks Amazon would have brought in.

@Geoff King- It's not surprising, considering that progressives look at black Americans as being a "special developmental needs" group that needs to be treated like children. Black conservatives like Candace Owens have pointed this out again and again, and it's genuinely appalling and (yes, I'll say it!) racist.

@Fred Ciampi- Absolutely! It's the dirty little not-so-secret of progressives that they think black citizens can't actually compete intellectually without help. Where we see fellow Americans, they see the Special Olympics.

@WDS- I deny everything. (grin)

@Rod- AOC's voice is really horrible. And there's a forced "little girl" quality and register to her voice that I worry about; it can sometimes be linked to early childhood sexual abuse (and no, I'm not kidding). I hope that's not the case here.

@Murphy (AZ)- Wait, you think she'll say it again?!

@M. Mitchell Marmel- The check's in the mail!

@TrickyRicky- I like it, too!

@kcmoonshiner- She was great in that movie!

@Liberty Card- Holy crap, I've got goosebumps (and I'm not kidding). I was already a fan of Smokey Robinson, but this takes it to a new level.

@Angus ranch- We all have different gifts...

@james daily- Well put!

@Tots- I agree with you right down the line. Logic and meaningful discourse have been supplanted by empty, ugly rhetoric and enmity. And you're right that the Dems have no ideas, while the GOP is happily spending us into oblivion. Clan McGregor, anyone?

@rickn8or- You're undoubtedly right. Plus, it takes a lot of time in the basement to get the cave-dwelling Antifa paleness.

@Shelly- Pelosi is in an uncomfortable spot. From which I can take at least a small bit of pleasure.

@Frenzchen- Good point...and frightening.

@Jim Irre- Well SOMEone had to say it!

Sam L. said...

I thought the word was "nuffin' ".

Mike aka Proof said...

Here's how to handle the "slave reparations" situation:
Create a box to be checked on every employment application, like the "veteran" or "minority" set asides, to give every one who "feels" that they deserve reparations extra points towards their next job.

Everyone who feels that they are owed something should have a box they can check for it, and I, as an employer, should be able to respond to your sense of entitlement!

Anonymous said...

Hey Stilton-
How about a cartoon like--
The makers of Mad Dog 20/20 are proud to announce "Peech Fouty Fi", a new Peach Brandy with 45% alcohol guaranteed to knock you on your a$$. Mad Maxine could be the spokesperson...

John the Econ said...

Another Progressive Democrat feels compelled to talk down to black Americans. Imagine that.

I have only a few points to add to @Stilton's salient observations about the Democrat's need to keep black America on the plantation while Progressive policy like welfare, open borders, and abortion continues to be socially, economically and politically decimating:

Nearly 20 years ago, the 2000 census revealed that Hispanics had outnumbered blacks as America's largest minority group. Next year the 2020 census will likely reveal in hard numbers that the proportion of black Americans to Hispanics has shrunk even more than most are aware of. And yet even with their diminishing numbers, the Democrats cannot win without a black unified voter turnout. This is why all of a sudden we've seen the sudden reemergence of the "reparations" agenda, with most of the leading Democratic Presidential hopefulls pandering enthusiastically for it.

IMHO, "reparations" will never happen for the simple reasons that it's not workable; there's no way to even remotely and equitably decide who should get how much. For example, Should Barack Obama be entitled to reparations? His mother was white and his father nor any of his black ancestors had ever been to this continent as a slave or otherwise. How about Liz Warren? Should black Americans like Ben Carson or Herman Cain who have been fabulously successful in America regardless of disadvantages real or imagined be eligible?

Or shall eligibility be based entirely upon skin color? How will that be determined? Will we use something like the embarrassing "colour bar" the South African regime used during apartheid?

So I think it's safe to assume that talk of reparations will never get down to details for the simple reason that it's totally unworkable. But the Progressive left will continue to push for this because there will be enough people who think it could happen, and that it will keep picking the scabs of America's painful past to keep America divided.

And thanks again, AOC: Just as the Green New Deal transparently exposed the real Progressive agenda behind Climate Change, her little pantomime act expressed how even the dumbest of Democrats honestly see one of their biggest and most necessary constituencies as even dumber than they are. Sad.

M. Mitchell Marmel said...

I will simply note that if reparations were taken to their absurd extreme, I'd own part of Mercedes-Benz, Krupp, IG Farben et cetera.

(for the record, the family name is Marmelstein; my father Anglicized it in the 1950s.)

(I missed a bullet, nearly was named Maurice Moishe Marmelstein, Jr.)

rickn8or said...

Anonymous-- And we could have Garrett Morris down in one corner of the screen translating Ebonix-to-English with American Sign Language thrown in.

John the Econ said...

Ocasio-Cortez Suddenly Shifts To Speaking Like Jar Jar Binks While Addressing Crowd Of Gungans

Joseph ET said...

David A. Clarke, Jr. AKA Sheriff Clarke twitted the other day;"White America has been paying out REPARATIONS for the last 50+ years in the form of affirmative action programs, hiring and promotion quotas and college admissions to the exclusion of whites."

The Harry Dan, I mean Bruce Bleu said...

OK Stilton, using electrical terminology, that really hertz, and if you persist at claims that I... SHE would do such a nefarious thing like pretend to be someone else, or use an insecure server, I... SHE will very likely offer her services as your personal physician, Dr. Jackie Kevorkian!

Colby Muenster said...

@John the Econ,
The Bee just successfully combined two characters that are like fingernails on a chalkboard to me. Muy, muy.... ick!

Dan said...

Over 100,000 Yankee combat deaths (doesn't include illness, etc.) should've covered it.
And then there's the stuff Sheriff Clarke is talking about in @Joseph ET's comment.

Don't forget the Pigford decision(s):
(From Wikipedia):
Pigford v. Glickman (1999) was a class action lawsuit against the United States Department of Agriculture (USDA), alleging racial discrimination against African-American farmers in its allocation of farm loans and assistance between 1981 and 1996. The lawsuit was settled on April 14, 1999, by Judge Paul L. Friedman of the U.S. District Court for the District of Columbia. To date, almost US$1 billion has been paid or credited to more than 13,300 farmers under the settlement's consent decree, under what is reportedly the largest civil rights settlement to date. As another 70,000 farmers had filed late and not had their claims heard, the 2008 Farm Bill provided for additional claims to be heard. In December 2010, Congress appropriated $1.2 billion for what is called Pigford II, settlement for the second part of the case.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Sam L.- That's entirely possible.

@Mike aka Proof- "Slavery Reparations" is the worst idea ever, and not just because we've already paid "reparations" in the form of food, housing, medicine, funding, and education for generations of black Americans who may, may, have had slaves in their family tree. There would be no just way to collect or distribute such a fund, and it would only cause grief.

@Anonymous- Wow, that's really tempting... And Maxine could even say "it comes with a brown paper bag, so even I can get a date."

@John the Econ- The whole "jive talk" or "preschool vocabulary" really pisses me off. If you treat people like mental invalids long enough, they may sadly come to believe it. True equality will only come about when black Americans are treated not only with equal respect and opportunity, but also equal responsibility and held to equal standards. And a LOT of that is going to have to come from within black culture and black families...somehow. The government can help a little by defunding anti-family programs and enabling school choice. But that's about all they can do. The whole situation saddens and sickens me, and seeing the race hustlers on the Left enrages me.

@M. Mitchell Marmel- I like the sound of "Marmelstein." I picture a monstrous jar of orange marmalade with bolts in its neck.

@rickn8or- Poor Garrett Morris. I don't know if he wasn't up to speed or if the SNL writers just didn't give him anything to work with, but he was the Juan Williams of Saturday Night Live.

@John the Econ- Damn, wish I'd thought of that!

@Joseph ET- My point exactly, but Sheriff Clarke puts it more eloquently.

@The Harry Dan, I mean Bruce Bleu- I stand cryptically warned...

@Colby Muenster- Yeah, it was a nice "twofer!"

@Dan- Yeah, when you start crunching numbers, it's clear that America has willingly made generous reparations already. We've also seen, thanks to the "Great Society" programs, that a sudden influx of cash is just as likely to hurt as help the recipients.

John the Econ said...

"The whole "jive talk" or "preschool vocabulary" really pisses me off. If you treat people like mental invalids long enough, they may sadly come to believe it. True equality will only come about when black Americans are treated not only with equal respect and opportunity, but also equal responsibility and held to equal standards."

Amen, brother.

But then there's the rank hypocrisy of the left. While granting themselves license to speak and act as nanny to people they regard as infantile, can you imagine the uproar were a conservative speak to any minority community in such a way?

Fred Ciampi said...

I seem to remember reading a while back that if a marble were as dense as the matter in a black hole its weight would match that of our planet. Hmmmmm, that's heavy.