Wednesday, May 13, 2020

His Only Vice

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Spending time in a locked and guarded room with books that have apparently never been opened is doing nothing to prevent Joe Biden from making fresh gaffes. In this case, according to alleged newspaper The NY Times, Biden "has likened running-mate evaluation to deciding among calendar models." Which seems like a total objectification of women unless he's actually considering putting Sports Illustrated calendar model Kate Upton on the ticket, in which case he may actually get our vote.

But we think Gropin' Joe was actually being metaphorical, meaning that he's selecting a VP candidate based entirely on superficial appearance and appeal. Which is not surprising, considering Joe rode into office with an arrogant, inexperienced nobody who was, in Biden's words, "the first sort-of-mainstream African-American who is articulate and bright and clean. I mean, that's a storybook, man!" Or a superficial calendar model, right Joe?

Meanwhile, Biden is doing his best to socially-distance himself from the growing Obamagate scandal, going so far as to say that when he was Vice President, he knew "nothing about those moves to investigate Michael Flynn." When it was pointed out that he was in attendance at the infamous Oval Office meeting of January 5, 2017 when Obama and his intelligence officers discussed the plot against Trump's incoming team, Biden corrected himself: "I was aware that there was...that they asked for an investigation, but that's all I know about it and I don't think anything else..."

Which we would find hard to believe if it weren't for the fact that it's so easy to picture Biden staring happily into space during high-level meetings, devoting his every thought to what he might have for lunch.

But other scoundrels were definitely paying attention that dark day. And with the benefit of new information to give us fresh eyes, let's take a look back in time to what we wrote only days after that meeting...

(January 9, 2017)

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There are two related stories to discuss today, both on the subject of Intelligence. A word which, needless to say when referring to Washington, refers to "spying" instead of anything remotely like "smartness" or "proper brain function."

Specifically, President-elect Donald Trump has made it clear that he doesn't consider US intelligence agencies to be 100% reliable, especially when it comes to their consensus accusation that Vladimir Putin interfered with our election by disguising himself with a pair of Groucho glasses, then driving a schoolbus filled with Cossacks to various polling places in key electoral states.

But before Hope n' Change dives into the details of the "Russian hacking" story, let's look at Barack Obama's recent claim of advising Trump - strictly as a professional courtesy - that as President he should always trust the US intelligence community.

"There are going to be times," the miserable stain on the Oval Office said, "where the only way you can make a good decision is if you have confidence that the process is working, and the people that you put in charge are giving you their very best assessments."

Really, Barry? Is that how you've conducted your presidency? Let's review a few fun facts. As president, B. Hussein skipped the majority of his intelligence briefings including the one immediately following the debacle in Benghazi. Barry also had nothing but foreign policy failures, and repeatedly placed the blame on his intelligence agencies.

So why should Trump - or the rest of us - invest our trust in the intelligence agencies who failed to see the rise of Isis? Who missed nuclear weapons development by Iran during our negotiations? Who were unable to connect the dots preceding Putin's many successful aggressions - as well as those of China and North Korea.

These are the intelligence agencies whose keen insights helped bring about nightmare scenarios in Syria, Libya, and pretty much every other country which has mosques. Intelligence agencies which failed to flag September 11th as a potentially meaningful day for terrorists to attack in Benghazi.

Intelligence agencies which, at least according to the administration, found it "no big deal" that Hillary (as freaking Secretary of State) put all of our national secrets on an unguarded personal server just so she could dodge future Freedom of Information Act demands to see documents rightfully belonging to the American people.

All of which brings us back to the "Election hacking" story. The intelligence agencies have now offered up their (ahem) official report on this alleged election-changing, super-sophisticated act of cyber terror, and have found that (cue the shower-stabbing music from "Psycho") Vladimir Putin personally ordered a monumental campaign to undermine our election and put his personal buddy, Donald Trump, into office!

But there's one little problem. While the declassified report is happy to draw this apocalyptic conclusion, it offers virtually no proof. We're asked to accept this poppycock on sheer trust, which would be a lot easier if the Obama administration and intelligence agencies had even an iota of credibility anymore.

But let's look at a couple of important things the report says that we can agree with: there was no hacking or interference with any voting or vote-tallying machines, and the intelligence agencies do not assert that the alleged Russian campaign had any influence on voters or the election. Wow.

It is also noteworthy that the intelligence agencies were able to draw such detailed conclusions considering the DNC failed to cooperate with the investigation, and wouldn't grant the FBI access to their computers. And interestingly, the report fails to note that the sensitive emails eventually released by Wikileaks (again, without direct evidence of Russian involvement) weren't even obtained by "hacking," but rather by a simple "phishing" email sent to John Podesta, in which he revealed that his password (and the key to all of the DNC's documents) was..."password."

The report also states that Putin's evil plan to overthrow our election involved schemes like having Russian newscasts criticize Hillary Clinton more than Donald Trump. Which apparently made a huge impact on the many voters whose primary source of information was Russian newscasts.

We could go on and on (and already have!) but our point is this: thanks to the Obama administration our intelligence agencies no longer have a whit of credibility, nor does their preposterously politicized "Russian hacking" report.

Considering 8 years of wall-to-wall failures, it's not surprising that Americans have decided to turn their backs on alleged "Intelligence" in favor of Donald Trump's promise of common sense.


Pat Cummings said...

Oh, Stilt... The whole DNC primary process has focused on superficial elements for years: skin color, gender, choice of bed partner, etc. All those "identity politics" considerations. Joe's blurted identity focus is just a little more, um, exposed than that of some of his erstwhile opponents.

Plus, I love the "Snirk" from the vault...

Regnad Kcin said...

For whom the bells toll, Gropey, for whom the bells toll...….

M. Mitchell Marmel said...

"What did he know and when did he know it?"

Gee, that sounds awfully familiar...

Brie Camembert said...

Sounds like Miss Ross has a chance at VP ;-)

Meanwhile pleeeeese let Barry get a stint at the Big House. (along with the usual suspects). He would look so good in orange.

Jay Dee said...

Only an idiot or a Democrat but, then I repeat myself, would believe the Russiagate narrative. Think about it. As Secretary of State, Hillary's involvement in the Uranium One deal demonstrated that she would sell out U.S. interests so long as the Clinton crime family got its cut. The Clinton's Kompromat files are probably measured in truckloads. If Putin wanted anyone in the White House it would have been Hillary. Russiagate was the Democratic party projecting their crimes on the Trump Administration.

rickn8or said...

What Jay Dee said.

Judi King said...

Oxymoron: Intelligence Agencies

TrickyRicky said...

Stilton, I absolutely love the blast from the past. You had it nailed from the get go, as per usual.

Jay Dee, I have been saying this to anyone who would listen for the last 3 years. Why in the world would Putin want Trump in the White House? Ma Barker was bought and paid for and as such would have been a willing accomplice in anything he wished to pursue, as well as a prime blackmail candidate. It makes as much sense as saying the Chicoms were pulling for Trump, after his three decades of excoriating them. Yeah, makes sense.

As for the Bite Me veep pick, maybe we could sneak a photo of Busty Ross into his Binders of Calendar Girls. Were he to win the election (God forbid) we would have a true patriot with the reins of power when his brain finally shorts out for good. Plus something tells me she would have no problem keeping -ahem- abreast of all situations.

Alej said...

"... "the first sort-of-mainstream African-American who is articulate and bright and clean. I mean, that's a story-book, man!" Or a superficial calendar model, right. American voter ?


Fritzchen said...

Let's see now:

1. We have an MSM that spins more than a Whirling Dervish on crystal meth.
2. A Hollywood claque that is more delusional than any average psychotic
3. A Democrat candidate for President who makes Mortimer Snerd look like a genius
4. A pandemic that is keeping us locked in our homes, unless you're a government sock puppet stooge of George Soros

In the immortal words of Mad Magazine's Walter Kozlowsky: WHAT, ME WORRY?

Geoff King said...

I'll just throw this out there:
Isn't the wearing of masks highly discriminatory against deaf people who require the reading of lips in order to communicate?

Pat Cummings said...

@Geoff King: Yes. And likely to be regarded by our bi-polar, polarized society just as critically/hypocritically as Biden's #MeToo...

Sandra Gray said...

I may be wrong (I am a lot of times) but didn't DEMOCRATS vote in the DEMOCRAT primaries? I sure didn't vote democrat in the primaries. SO - why are democrats boo-hooing that there is no woman, or person of "Color", or an abc-xyz-m-o-u-s-e person as their Presidential candidate? Aren't THEY the ones that voted (or didn't vote) for anyone other than biden?

REM1875 said...

So now the media is laying out cash for bigger and much faster spin cycle machines ......looks like they are all in for slow joe.....Gonna be a lot of work spinning and ignoring ... good thing they have adam schitt on their side ......... they will be needing a lot of urianalyst ... why not use illegal aliens ??? .......... might be a good time to invest in aluminum for tin foil hats .... I see a lot of use for them for the left .... wonder if pre-manufactured
tin foil hats will be a good investment ???

John the Econ said...

Biden really said that? ROFL! It's going to be fun watching Democrats squirm to defend this insanity against the supposedly mentally unstable Trump. Romney was roasted for his "binder", but Biden has got his calendar girl collection. But to we really want to see Stacey Abrams on the beach in a two-sizes-too-small bikini?

Great post today.

Considering his exponentially growing degree of incoherency, it's pretty clear that "social distancing" will be the most imperative strategy of the Biden campaign until, and probably after the election. But at least such incoherence offers him plausible deniability for the whole Flynn/Crowdstrike/Crossfire Hurricane affair.

As for our "intelligence" agencies: I'm old enough to remember when the left despised the "intelligence" community. It's become clear that it's time for a wholesale housecleaning. We have the most lavishly funded and supposedly technically capable intelligence apparatus in the history of mandkind, and yet they continually seem to have missed out on most of the biggest events of the last quarter century. Yeah, we can fault Obama for blowing off his daily briefings. But what was he really missing, other than the opportunity for plausible deniability for all the mischief that it seems these agencies were up on on his behalf?

REM1875 said...

@ Gpa J said...
Probably like the St Patrick's Day beer girl.

I don't give a damned what you are referring to..... she has my votes !!! Of course I mean vote not votes (HAHAHAHAHA Sure i do ) .......
Oh damn did I just say that out loud ???
And besides my votes ....damn it ... vote ... St Patrick's Day beer girl can have my phone number ..... my address ..... I am also willing to share a portion of my retirement and SS with her too ..... with the right agreement ......

And leave her alone Gpa J ....... I saw her first !!!

Stilton did I just happen to mention that she wasn't too bad and maybe seeing a little bit more of her (no no I don't mean that way ...snicker ..snicker....Like hell I don't) would be OK with me ???

REM1875 said...

@John the Econ said...
"....... But do we really want to see Stacey Abrams on the beach in a two-sizes-too-small bikini?"

John Not sure they could fit all that on just a few pages .....unless they just use 'Google Earth" satellite images ???

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Pat Cummings- You're right that the Dems focus only on the superficial when it comes to getting elected, keeping their true intent hidden until they get power. And it's fairly rare for me to republish an entire post from the past, but when I looked at this in proximity to that Jan 5 meeting, I just couldn't resist the "I told you so!" moment.

@Regnad Kcin- Biden: "Did someone say belles...?"

@M. Mitchell Marmel- For Biden, it should be "What did he know, when did he know it, when did he forget it, and who's turn is it to change his Depends?"

@Brie Camembert- Damn, that WOULD swing my vote in November! And while I yearn to see Barry in prison garb ("Orange is the new half-black"), I don't think it will ever happen. Some mountebanks are too big to fail.

@Fish Out of Water- Damn, I may actually have to steal the idea of putting Lefty Lucy on the ticket...! And although Barry says he'll be campaigning for Biden, we all know he's really just campaigning to oust Trump before the bloodhounds come to Obama's door. I don't think Barry even likes Biden.

@Jay Dee- I agree entirely. Russia didn't want Trump - he's too much of a loose cannon. They wanted dealmaking, thoroughly compromised Hillary. Any "interference" in our election wasn't to select a was just to screw around with our heads. Mission accomplished!

@rickn8or- Yeah, what you said.

@Judi King- I was going to come back with "honest lawyer" being an oxymoron, but then I remembered that my grandfather was one.

@Gpa J- Erin go braless?

@TrickyRicky- Not to toot my own horn (which would probably throw my back out), but the old Hope n' Change stuff has held up remarkably well over time. I'm pretty proud of that archived material (still at

And yep (again) to the notion that Russia would have preferred Hillary as president.

@Alej- Regarding those voters, fool them once - shame on you. Fool them twice - they can all go straight to Hell.

@Fritzchen- Not only a fine analysis, but you get bonus points for referring to Mortimer Snerd (Candice Bergen's half-brother).

@Geoff King- Quick! Get the patent on masks with transparent plastic lip-windows!

@Pat Cummings- I realize Geoff was kidding, but it does sound plausible, doesn't it?

@Sandra Gray- Great point. Kamala Harris, currently considered the leading contender for VP despite calling Biden a racist, whined when discontinuing her presidential bid that voters weren't ready for "a female president of color." But as you point out, the only voters she was referring to were Democrats. Racist, sexist Democrats - right?

@REM1875- Pre-manufactured tinfoil hats is a great idea! Some people would think that their production would be a conspiracy - but then they'd have to buy a tinfoil hat! Easy money!

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@John the Econ- Biden really said it (well, according to the NY Times) but the rest of his remark referred to the models as being male, like "Mr. October" or "Mr. December." So in context, his remarks weren't so much sexist as offensively and stupidly honest.

And I have zero respect for our intelligence agencies these days. We've seen their screw-ups and corruption, but have never seen that desperately needed housecleaning you refer to. I damn well would like to see Michael Flynn made head of the FBI just to see what kind of Hell he'd raise.

@REM1875- I'll drink green beer to that!

@REM1875- I was going to make a joke about Stacey Abrams buying her toothbrush at The Gap, but then decided that I'm above that sort of thing.

Fish Out of Water said...

Seriously though, given what a potential disaster Biden may turn out to be, are the democrats truly going to make him their anointed? (In all fairness, the same question might have been asked by democrats in 2016)

Something just doesn't add up- smell right, etc.

Dan said...

Darn. From the e-mail alert, I had expected to find some Vargas-style pin-up calendar girls. And what pictures did we get?

Geoff King said...

@ Stilton: I actually thought about the viability of "lip window masks", if for no other reason than to be able to tell if someone was sticking their tongue out at you. I then realized that your breath would likely render it translucent from moisture.
Speaking as a person with asthma, I also would not appreciate the even lesser amount of oxygen I could access when I needed to gasp for air.

Geoff King said...

Re: Asian Murder Hornets. Although some are now saying that name is racist, even though they are yellow, have strange eyes, want to kill us, and are from Asia. I look past all that and am just thankful we finally have an insect that makes for great target practice.

Fish Out of Water said...

The unmasking of the unmasked, calls for a special edition of Stilton's Place.

John the Econ said...

Not holding my breath.

Rand Paul calls for investigations into handling of Michael Flynn case

JustaJeepGuy said...

I have to agree with @Jay Dee, @Tricky Ricky, @Stilt, and anyone and everyone else who says that "the Russians" wanted Hitlary to win in 2016, if for no other reason than that she could be blackmailed over the 33,000 emails.

Anyone who thinks "the Russians" didn't already have the emails--before Donald Trump said anything about them--is likely a Demo_Rat, fooling him/herself. Even Hitlary herself knew "the Russians" had the emails as soon as the emails got to her unsecured email server. It was probably her intention!

Rod said...

Viewed as a whole: With Biden's ridiculousness; the desire for ongoing school & economic shutdown, liberal bail-out money of more trillions under the cover of pandemic; the walls starting to fall-in on them legally; polls shifting; population becoming upset: It seems Democrats still are not taking this November elections seriously. They have nothing to offer. The current path is highly suspect. But it's as if they regard it as just another nuisance to be overcome; and THINK they have the plan to do just that.

I sure hope they again don't have a solution to their problem.

But it's still very surprising how many people I know still do not intend to vote for Trump. I don't LIKE him either; but how can anyone vote for the D. alternative? I no longer think its about intelligence; I think it's about cultural conditioning, lack of preparedness, and a frightening amount of ignorance.

Colby Muenster said...

Maybe it's just me, but I thought Tulsi Gabbard almost sounded reasonable during the debates, she's considered a minority, AND she qualifies for the main requirement (has a vagina). Would the DNC allow "Walter" Biden pick her. Not in a million years... She can't pull in the "green" vote, and ol' Walter needs that to win. The DNC has a problem here. They need that moonbat vote, but moonbats are notoriously fickle when it comes to actually voting.

I think Trump has this knocked, but am still holding my breath until November. The dirty deeds will escalate beyond our wildest imaginations over the summer.

John the Econ said...

@Colby Muenster, you are right. The Democrats are boxed in. On one hand they can't win without the far-far-left vote energized. But that same far-far-left agenda offends the more moderate Democrats and actually pushes many to Trump. It's a finicky calculus that would be hard enough to pull off without their lead candidate being incoherent.

On the other hand, perhaps incoherence is all Biden really has going for him at this point. It's certainly not his agenda (or lack of one beyond Make America 2008 Again!)

As I've said before, Trump is almost lucky the Wuhan flu happened. Odds were even that after a solid 3 years of growth, we would have seen a slowdown if not a recession by November, that certainly would have been pinned on Trump. (Never mind that growth under Obama never warranted an actual recession) Try as some might, there's no way to pin the collateral damage of the Wuhan flu on Trump. The Democrats are doing all they can to see to it that nobody has any reason to go back to work this year to keep things sinking in hopes that they might reacquire voters lost in the last 3 years. Expect outright vote buying by summer.

Speaking of Biden:

Biden’s Rapid Response Director Attacks Catherine Herridge, Then Deletes His Tweet

"...the attack was “beneath [the] integrity” of the Biden campaign. If so, this must have been really low. The “integrity” of Biden’s campaign in the past few weeks has mostly consisted of #BelieveWomen-feminists suddenly deciding they don’t believe Tara Reade."

That made me laugh.

rickn8or said...

John the Econ, "integrity" and "Biden" do not belong in the same sentence.

Drew458 said...

@M. Mitchell Marmel - The cover of today's (3/14) New York Post:

"what did Biden know and when did he forget it?"

Suzy said...

Crazier days we have never seen. The news is LITERALLY making heads spin on a daily basis.

Hey, Stilt, do you have a Twitter account?