Monday, October 26, 2020

Toe Biden

stilton’s place, stilton, political, humor, conservative, cartoons, jokes, hope n’ change, election, npr, foot job, hunter biden, joe biden

Despite finally coming up from the cellar, Joe Biden's campaign is again stuck in debasement. As if it wasn't bad enough that his son Hunter's laptop computer is packed with evidence of corruption (including payouts of foreign money to Joe "The Big Guy" Biden himself), a new video of Hunter has been released by a Chinese TV channel which is literally a kick in the nuts. Which is a perfectly good joke that you may not get unless you read further which, in good conscience, we don't necessarily recommend. Because there's no way to handle this story tactfully or tastefully, even if we wanted to. Which we don't. Read on at your own risk and please, avoid having a mouthful of liquid until you've safely reached the bottom of the page.

The video (which you can see here until it's "disappeared") shows a fully nude Hunter Biden reclining in a dark room, simultaneously smoking crack and holding up his cellphone to take closeup movies of someone (reputed to be an underage female) vigorously stroking "little Hunter" with her oiled feet. An act which is unbelievably dangerous owing to the risk of contracting "athlete's dick."

It's also not safe because this is the sort of thing the Chinese government loves to record to use as blackmail against people of influence. Like, oh, the potential president of the United States

Then again, blackmail only works if the intended victim is afraid of the news getting out - and that seems increasingly unlikely to happen in the United States as mainstream news outlets and social media platforms continue to actively erase any and all references to Biden-family malfeasance. Even dull as dishwater (and taxpayer-supported) NPR has announced that they won't tell their listeners anything about Hunter's laptop (his computer, not his foot warmer) nor Joe's role in selling influence to foreign adversaries. Their reason for burying the story is somewhat convoluted, but it more or less wraps up with "and the horse you rode in on."

Of course, that dam won't hold forever - but it doesn't have to. Once Biden is elected, the real powerbrokers on the Left will be only too happy to see him resign, get impeached, or go to jail. Old Joe's only use is to get their foot in the door. So to speak. 


Mike aka Proof said...

And we thought Joe was sleazy! He's got nothing on Hunter!

Pat Cummings said...

No mo video...

But a rack of comments from "Biden20" with a shaking finger GIF!

M. Mitchell Marmel said...

Guess you COULD call this story a "Toe Jam Football"...

igor said...

Joe is just the camel's nose under the tent flap...

He'll be tossed out like yesterdays diapers and the REAL Ghouls will be set free.

Regnad Kcin said...

The shoe is now on the other foot. Check out Dan Bongino's interview with Rudy Guiliani concerning the laptop lasciviousness and assorted Hunter vids. Be sure to have a barf bag handy.........

Colby Muenster said...

There's something wrong with that link. I can't open it. Big surprise, eh?

Gorgon Zola said...

Video link is still good even if content is appalling.

WM said...

Not sure how the Sultan of Slime made out but that poor girl must have awfully tired legs. But taking the optimistic view here: if you have soft feet and strong ankles you will have ample job opportunities under the Biden/Harris administration. In fact,this girl alone, may explain why Joe seldom comes out of the basement. After all, the acorn seldom falls far from the tree.

TrickyRicky said...

The Davos/Bilderberg globalist mafia, which is oh so close to achieving their goal of total submission of all of us serfs, is not only power-mad but depraved in all ways and forms. To lift a lyric from an old Morrissey tune, they would make Caligula blush.

Anonymous said...

Wondering... Is it called Athlete's Huang in China?

Sortahwitte said...

Hope you have got your things together,
Hope you are quite prepared to die.
Looks like we're in for nasty weather,
One eye is taken for an eye.

Pray for peace, but prepare for war.

TVAG said...

It was "up" (the video) at 10:50 AM CST this date. At first it has hardly possible to see the face of the principal actor of the piece (again, so to speak), but when he lit up his crack pipe, it was pretty convincingly Hunter.

Some 3.4 million views were claimed on the page, and I hope at least a few were able to copy it for posterity.

Yep! "... Make Caligula blush."


Valvenator said...

Either that site is being swamped or the Chi-Coms are trying to block it.
It took forever to load.

I don't remember ever hearing the term 'kleptocrats' but it suits them to a T

a ruler who uses political power to steal his or her country's resources

John the Econ said...

I consult in IT, and if there is any lesson to be taken from the tale of Hunter's laptop, it's never stiff your IT guy.

I think I'll pass on the video. I get the idea.

To be sure, historically evidence of such indiscretions have regularly been used as fodder for the blackmail of influential people. But in this age I have to wonder if it's worth the trouble because if your goal is to blackmail a Progressive, as @Stilton pointed out with NPR and the laptop it turns out that the Progressive establishment just doesn't care.

Now if you're a conservative, look out! Remember two years ago, the media had an army of investigators scouring Brett Kavanaugh's high school yearbooks for any imagined references to "rape gangs". (If I recall correctly, there was an absurd debate during the confirmation hearings about some outside-the-box interpretation of teenage expressions)

But they couldn't care less about Hunter's laptop. In fact, if the laptop was in fact the creation of Chinese or Russian actors, you'd think they'd be anxious to prove that. But no.

This phenomenon isn't new. Over a quarter century ago after watching the mainstream media whitewash all the Clinton scandals during the '92 election, I came to the conclusion that video could emerge of Bill & Hillary clubbing baby harp seals to death for the mere amusement of doing so, and the New York Times would write op-eds about the personal sacrifice the Clinton were undertaking to do so for the betterment of us all. There could be video of Hunter on Jeffery Epstein's orgy island under a pile of 13-year-old sex slaves, and they wouldn't care. Today, I honestly have to wonder just what the Clintons or Bidens would have to do to earn the scorn of their media enablers.

The other day, a friend of mine tried to post an article about Hunter's indiscretions, and Facebook blocked it because it violated "community standards" for "adult sexual exploitation". Ironic, eh?

In response, I created a "Marked Safe From News about Hunter Biden's Laptop" meme at Strangely enough, that as well has since disappeared from

If this media lack of curiosity and censorship is bad now, I am shuddering to think how bad it's going to be next year, regardless of who wins.

Colby Muenster said...

Poor girl probably got syphilis of the feet!

Edam Wensleydale said...

@John: I will simply note that members of the Fifth Column, er, Fourth Estate are immune to neither hemp nor "nails" and that "pour encourager les autres" can very well apply to them as well...

Buck O'Fama said...

More serious disease potential there:

FlyBoy said...

I unfortunately watched the vid...not all of it, but enough to make me reach for the eye bleach!

B.C. said...

The Hunt For Ped Oc-Toe-ber.

Dr. Very Strangelove.

One Foot All Over The Cuckoo's Nest.



Caught Flat-footed (Or Red Handjobbed)

Arch Enemas.

Pediatric Podophilia Parade.

*Slinks off to resume lurking*

Anonymous said...

This is unbelievable, but then again It's Hunter Biden for sure which one can see when he lights up his pipe. A sleaze ball, just like "THE BIG GUY".

JustaJeepGuy said...

@John the Econ said,

"Today, I honestly have to wonder just what the Clintons or Bidens would have to do to earn the scorn of their media enablers."

I am wondering the same thing myself. President Trump said something about shooting someone on Fifth Ave. What would it take for the left to condemn a Demo_Rat?

George said...

Well played!

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Mike aka Proof- The two Bidens are different kinds of sleazeballs. I don't know about Joe's sexual shenanigans (well, other than highly verifiable allegations) but DO know that I consider selling the influence of his Vice Presidency worries be more than someone using crack.

@Pat Cummings- It was still there when I looked a short while ago. Maybe local webhosts are blocking it?

@M. Mitchell Marmel- Does that mean we should call this Hunter "Bungalow Bill?"

@igor- You're right. Joe is the camel's make room for Camel Toe Harris.

@Regnad Kcin- Rudy can be a bit wacky himself these days, so I'm sure hoping all of this proves to be solid.

@Colby Muenster- I'm assuming you can find the video elsewhere, although God knows what Google will do to your algorithyms if you run a search...

@Gorgon Zola- I did NOT want to link to that video, but I figured I should so copies might continue to exist if the site was suddenly shut down.

WM- The female in the video should wear a pedometer. A washable one.

@TrickyRicky- Sounds accurate to me.

@Anonymous- I would certainly think so!

@Sortahwitte- I hear ya. The lyrics I've been thinking of lately are:

laugh about it, shout about it
When you've got to choose
Any way you look at it
You lose.

@TVAG- Yes, the light was good enough during the crack smoking that you could tell it's either Hunter or a debauched identical twin.

@Valvenator- I would guess the site is getting DOS attacks to slow it down or stall it out. From the Chi-Coms, the DNC, George Soros, and others.

@John the Econ- "If this media lack of curiosity and censorship is bad now, I am shuddering to think how bad it's going to be next year, regardless of who wins." This is my very real fear. We may be in the last days of free speech and the free flow of truthful (if politically inconvenient) information. I'm trying not to dwell on what that would mean for my family and our country, but I've got to admit the grim possibilities are weighing on me.

@Colby Muenster- I'm sure Hunter can get her a visit to the back alley clinic of Dr. Scholl...

@Edam Wensleydale- So they're afraid of French?!

@Buck O'Fama- And in this case, does a bunion become a funion?

@FlyBoy- I sort of skimmed it out of journalistic duty. I can't even imagine living in the kind of messed up (methed up?) mind that would make these behaviors seem like a good idea.

@B.C.- Hey, with snappy material like that, don't you dare go back to lurking! (grin)

@Anonymous- Owing to the blurred part of the video, I couldn't see if he has sleaze balls, but I'll be your right!

@JustaJeepGuy- I think if one of them actually endorsed Trump, then the Leftists would shoot the traitor on Fifth Avenue.

@George- I agree! There are clever people around here!

John the Econ said...

@JustaJeepGuy said, "President Trump said something about shooting someone on Fifth Ave. What would it take for the left to condemn a Demo_Rat?"

Last week, Biden quipped "...we had a good relationship with Hitler before he invaded the rest of Europe". Yeah, it was said in sarcasm. But could you imagine if Trump had said anything remotely like that?

@Stilton, most of the tech billionaires who control the better part of the Internet have left little question of where they stand, and quite frankly it differs little from what China practices as official policy. The problem is that it's not possible to "moderate" user content without using some sort of filter, and that filter is transparently and overwhelmingly Progressive. And they are far more scared of the Democrats than they are of Trump, the worst fascist dictator ever. They know Trump would not, or could not touch them in any meaningful way. The Democrats on the other hand would have no problem taking over their businesses "in the public interest".

Valvenator said...

If this really gets out in the open like it should
how long before we're told that
"Trump is colluding with China to fix the election"
pretty much in the same way they tried to connect
'The Epoch Times' to the Chinese Communist Govt.

JustaJeepGuy said...

It's funny, but Gropey Joe's Hitler quip actually DID apply to all of America's communists from 1939 (He had been bad before 1939 but was suddenly good after the Molotov-Ribbentrop Pact) until June 22, 1941 when Hitler launched Operation Barbarossa against the Soviet Union. The commies loved Hitler and were protesting aid for Britain in front of the White House....those "protests" suddenly evaporated overnight and suddenly Hitler was bad again. In those days, the Demo_Rats weren't quite the commie-lovers they are now.

John the Econ said...

@JustaJeepGuy, the only salient difference between communism and fascism is in the bookkeeping: The fascists will let you think you can own property or the means of production. But at the end of the day, you are still subject to the whims of the ruling class.

For example, Liz Warren is actually a fascist. Her "Accountable Capitalism" initiative will let you own a company, but she'll require that her cronies be on your corporate board calling the shots.

I don't know why we continue to call the Chinese "communists". You can now own property in China, and even become a billionaire. But the government still calls the shots, and if you fall into disfavor, you will be disappeared.

The Chinese today are actually "fascists".

A. Dumas said...

Athlete's Dick is nothing to sneeze at...

Colby Muenster said...

Off the subject here, but I'm betting Stilton covers this tomorrow.

Chuck You Schumer is beside himself today. Apparently the Senate put some half baked lunatic on the Supreme Court last night, prompting Chuckie to vow to get even when HE'S in power.

Geez, Chuckie, Presidents have been upsetting the opposition for centuries with Supreme Court picks, so cool your jets. We are stuck with two left wing SCOTUS dingbats thanks to you and O'Ass-munch, so in my mind, Trump is now taking HIS turn at getting even with you.

And, besides, Chuckie, it was your bosom buddy, Harry Reid that made this possible, so in that regard, thanks!