Friday, January 22, 2021

The Cheerful Monkey Wrench

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Readers- to give my hand (and psyche) a much-needed rest, I'm delighted to present a great guest column today from our own M. Mitchell Marmel! Take it away, Mitch...


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Okay, we've had a day or two of mourning. Now it's time to get down to business.

The naysayers aside, all hope is not lost. To quote the old cliché, “Where there is life, there is hope”. You can step outside today and notice that the world has not actually ended. The sun is still rising and setting, the air is breathable (for the most part), the food producers are still delivering milk, bread and eggs, and Clan MacGregor may still be purchased by the pint, quart, gallon and barrel.

So you've had a setback? Not your first, won't be your last. “Man is born to toil and sorrow,” or words to that effect.

So what can you do?

1) Turn their words against them. “Think globally, act locally.” You can fulminate about the swamp dwellers in seats of power all you like, but the hard, cold facts are that you, as an individual, have little to no effect on what actions they take (unless you LIKE dressing up in buffalo horns and swiping lecterns, which isn't ending well for that chap). So, make a difference in your neighborhood. Even something as small as picking up a piece of litter improves your immediate environment. It might not make much difference to the world at large, but it'll make YOU feel better.

2) Comfort the afflicted. Nothing gives you a lift more than giving a helping hand to those worse off than you are. I do volunteer work at a railroad museum, as that happens to be one of my interests, and watching the folks' eyes light up when they see the electric trains rolling... well, that's why I spend my time and treasure doing it.

3) Afflict the comfortable. It's fun annoying libs, which is one reason my home page on Faecesbook features “Stilton's Place” and similar material. Wanna know the fun part? The angry comments. I get, “Mitch, why do you keep POSTING this shit?” They just don't seem to realize that they've answered their own question.

4) Do not respond to anger with anger, as that's what they want. Back in the pre-Internet days, some of the dialup bulletin boards I frequented had something called “P.I.S.S.”, which stood for “Passively Ignoring Silent Strike”. Even before the Net, we knew feeding the trolls only encouraged them, and if PISS was declared on a user, that user was effectively sent to Coventry, which tended to shut them up quite nicely.

5) If they're going to be childish, be an adult. One thing I've found is that many liberals are essentially insecure, craving attention and affirmation. Deny that to them and they shrivel up and vanish.

6) Be prepared to throw a monkey wrench into the works. This DOES NOT mean go around looking for trouble, but, if an opportunity presents itself to stick it to the opposition, grab it with both hands. If Antifa leaves a pallet of bricks around for throwing, steal it and build that garden wall you've been wanting. Use your imagination.

7) Never pass up a chance to help another if you can. A few weeks back, I was exiting a pawn shop (looking for a used web cam, but that's another story) and noted a middle-aged couple trying to stuff a large dorm refrigerator into a small Asian car and not having much success. Well, this sort of thing is why I drive a Ford station wagon. Within minutes, we had the fridge in the back of my car and on route to the couple's house. To this day, I have no idea of their name, race, creed or political beliefs. All I know is that they have their refrigerator home, and that's the important part.

The most important part?

8) Be of good cheer.

Remember how sweet liberal tears taste? Well, they find your tears equally tasty. 

Make the bastards die of thirst. 


M. Mitchell Marmel said...

Boy, that writer sure can write! And he's good looking and charming too! Wish I could be just like him!

Oh, wait. ;^.^

Anonymous said...

I have taken great pleasure in bringing a simple piece of chalk with me when I go out, and chalking things like "#RESIST!" and "Hail to the Thief" and "BADA" (Biden's Acting Demented Again) in parking lots, sidewalks, public walls, and over murals by leftist painters. Don't get caught!

George said...

Good work Triple M!
All the best to you.

Anonymous said...

Two good things to irritate lefties online: if you're called a TROLL, agree and respond with


BADA bing, BADA bam, BADA boom!

Unknown said...

Mitch, I would like to repost #4 at several other sites, along with a live link back to the full article. May I?

The more people who read your article the better.

M. Mitchell Marmel said...

@Unknown: By all means, be my guest!

This goes for everyone else, too! Feel free to spread this around far and wide. :D

Mike aka Proof said...

Good thoughts! I may steal your quote on stealing bricks!

mamafrog said...

Good thoughts MMM! Exactly what I've been trying to remind myself to do. I can only have faith that God will eventually right things in our world. Thanks for letting him sub in Stilt!

Maoz said...

Great post, MMM!

Stilt, hope you'll soon see light at the end of the carpal tunnel. Refuah shleimah.

Rather OT, but it popped into my head and needs to come out (wouldn't want to censor myself!) ---

"That book, 'To Serve Man' ... it's a Facebook!!!"

Anonymous said...

Having woken up grumpy, you turned it around and I'm smiling and chuckling over this advice. Funny and wise. Kids have a saying- "you get what you get (git) and don't throw a fit".

donpaul53 said...

I always thought that pouring a bag of Portland cement on a pallet of bricks, and watering it in would slow them down

Edam Wensleydale said...

@donpaul: A few gallons of Krazy Glue would have the same effect and work almost instantaneously.

Bobo the Hobo said...

Who was that Masked Man? 😆

I love the chalk and #RESIST! Gonna start doing that. My way of irritating the lefties (especially the young ones): when they begin their verbal antics, I tell them I’m going to pray for them. Seems to affect ‘em like holy water thrown on the Devil.

Jerryskids said...

I like turning their own words on them - any time you see a lefty spouting the usual nonsense I just find some little snippet of something they've said to accuse them of racism, misogyny, transphobia, or some other aspect of white supremacy colonialist Nazism. And you can always find something, it's easy to twist their words to mean something other than what they actually meant. "You say you like pancakes? You know pancakes were invented by the Yoruba tribe in Africa? That's cultural appropriation and this sort of insensitivity to other cultures is exactly what we're struggling against and why we need to educate your kind."

Snark said...

Thank you, Stilt and 3M! All good practices, even before the debacle of the last election. I'm fortunate to live in the boonies of a conservative county. The libs know that not only they are out numbered, most of the conservatives carry. As Robert Heinlein said: "An armed society is a polite society." The real thing to remember is that the dhimmicrats have a very slim majority in the House and tied in the Senate. Even at the Federal level we can still jam up the works.

In two years we have another election for the House and the Senate. Start working NOW to push the local and state GOP to remember who they work for and to grow a backbone and set of cojones. Primary the RINOs and work for the conservatives. We may be a bit down, but NEVER out!

Fred Ciampi said...

Excellent essay MMM. Lots of good advice as well. I was hoping to ask a liberal how they like their new prez but there are none that I can find here in Hillbillyland. I am glad though, that we have about 5 years of survivor food and are close to the river. Oh, and lots of ammo. WooHoo and Semper fi.

Gary said...

When I post a comment libbers don't like, instead of a debate I get nasty comments back, such as GFY, or worse. I respond with Thank you for your kind and considerate thoughts.

TrickyRicky said...

Strong post MMM. Thanks!

Stilton, I hope your carpal tunnel gets better soon. I always wondered what carp need a tunnel for, but that's another story.

Alfonso Bedoya said...

BRAVO, MMM. Loud and Clear. Will Forward. Out.

Pat Cummings said...

Great work, @M. Mitchell Marmel! May I add one?
Teach the Children Well. Those of us "of a certain age" tend to loose contact with (or dismiss) our younger citizens. I recommend reaching out with well-honed tales of horror and merriment, designed to illuminate the down-side of socialism and progressivism. They aren't learning it in school at any level! So be the teacher; give them the ammo to fight off the indoctrination. Hint: a punchline works better than a grumble, and a snarky tagline works better than either!

M. Mitchell Marmel said...

@Pat: Excellent advice! I'm actually mulling over another guest column, with Stilton's permission, and will incorporate that.

In the meantime, everyone, here's your very own PISS graphic with which to shut down trolls!


John the Econ said...

Amen, @M. Mitchell Marmel.

1: In other words, Alinsky #4 is a bitch.

There is a reason that "nice" neighborhoods look nicer than crappy ones, and it's not about money. It's because people in the nice neighborhoods care and make personal effort to keep them that way.

IMHO, people pay too much attention to what happens in Washington while totally neglecting what is happening in their own communities. Your local community is where the things that really matter in the quality of your daily life really happens. I have always been directly or indirectly involved in my local body politic for that reason.

2: Absolutely. You aren't just helping someone else.

3: Nothing annoys Progressives more than the people who disagree with them living happy, fulfilling lives. My happiness is not and will not be defined or determined by who occupies the White House.

4: Hate and anger by itself just makes people stupid. 5 years of watching the TDS afflicted should be a solid lesson in how that looks to others. Rise above it.

5: Similar to the above. Conservatives always have been the adults in the world, and we need to rise to the role.

6: Similar to 3. If capitalism is good at anything, it excels at being a foil for Progressive overreach. The left will spend the next 2-to-4 years throwing monkey wrenches into the economy. Capitalism always finds a work-around.

7: Absolutely. Similar to 2. It costs so little, and yet you can never know or appreciate how much simple acts can mean to someone else, especially someone you don't even know.

8: Absolutely, and probably the most important. (Similar to 3) "Happiness" is largely a choice. I am not going to let the behavior of other people I don't even know determine my happiness. Those who wait for politicians to make them happy will always be disappointed and miserable. Don't be those people.

This list is excellent, but let me add one more courtesy of Andrew Breitbart:

“If you can’t sell freedom, you suck!”

The real "civil war" isn't going to be won with violence. It's going to be won with ideas. And the best way to sell that is with happy, fulfilling lives regardless of what the Progressives throw at us. We will never win over all of them, or even most of them. But we will win enough of them.

Colby Muenster said...

Here's hoping your poor wrists are healing up, and great choice having MMM fill in to give you a much deserved break.

Well done, fine sir! Great advice and very uplifting. You mentioned doing volunteer work at a railroad museum. There is one of those nearby me in Spenser, NC. Could we be neighbors?

Concerning #4, here's something that was written a couple thousand years ago by a guy named Paul:

"But if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him a drink; for by doing this you will heap burning coals on his head.”

A liberals absolutely can't fathom why we think the logical way we do, and it apparently frustrates the crap out of them to the point where they rant and rave, sometimes violently. Responding to that with kindness is the very best thing you can do to shut it down. That being said:

#1... Put a "Resist" sticker on your car, but put a "Socialism" sticker just under it. An "Impeach Biden/Harris" sticker is good too. They actually have these for sale on line already. I still see idiots driving around with Obammy and Shrillary stickers, so why not?

@Pat Cummings,
More great advice! My libtard son managed to have four sons of his own. Due to his inability to be a real father, all four ended up living with me. Now, two are in college, and two in HS, and all four are solid conservatives with a disdain for their ignorant snowflakey peers. Mrs. Muenster and I didn't drive this into their heads, we taught by example, and let them see both sides. It was actually the oldest who took me to a 2016 Trump rally the day after President Trump got the Republican nomination.

Anonymous said...

Well said!

bill wald said...

The good news is that the Democrats control congress and the presidency.

Our response should be to demand that the Democrats fulfill all their promises. If the economy crashes fast enough, the voters should catch on in less than 2 years. If they don't catch on in 4 years, then we have earned and deserve the destruction of the US Empire.

Old Cannonballs said...

Every night I wake up in the wee hours with a knot in my stomach, and I can't get back to sleep unless I get up (quietly, so as not to disturb my wife) and pray deeply for at least an hour. I pray the Rosary, because I find it so effective, and because when the Blessed Virgin Mary appeared to the children at Fatima and performed the "Miracle of the Sun" in front of 70,000 astonished observers in 1917, she asked us to pray it.
She also said that human behavior was becoming increasingly sinful and depraved, and that unless men repented God would chastise us severely, but that in the end good would prevail. She said that the war would shortly end (WWI), which it did, and that if men didn't turn back to God, which they didn't, another worse war would break out (WWII), which it did, and in the exact time frame that she foretold.

If that didn't do the trick, worse horrors would be in store. Also, she said that the "errors of Russia" would spread throughout the world. That is where we are today, I am convinced.

After praying for at least an hour, I become inwardly filled with peace. For an hour I beg God to deliver us from evil, and at the end of that hour I realize in a profound way that that is exactly what God is doing by allowing unbridled evil to scourge us. I'm not a prophet, but I'll bet anyone on this forum a gallon of Clan Macgregor that things will get worse and worse until there is no way humanly possible out of it. That way, when God steps in and finally cleans up the mess (AFTER men turn back to God with tears of repentance and penance and sacrificing and fasting and almsgiving), it will be obvious to all that it was the doing of God and not man.

2021 will be way worse than 2020, I think. I don't even want to think about 2022 or beyond. It's going to be a rough ride, so hang on tight, prepare for the worse (just in case, at the very least), and remember that God is in control. If you do your best to know, love and serve God, you're golden even if they make lampshades out of your body in a FEMA camp somewhere.

Rod said...

"Bricks" reminds me of when we were getting over-run with feral cats at the rural place. I didn't want to shoot one and opted for some fun instead. Put an old red brick out with a safe backstop, with an unwashed empty can of tuna next to it. And it didn't take long.

Cat came to the brick & can; I mean right there. I shot the brick with a 30-30 from about 20 yards, shooting out through the window of the cabin. Big bang; Brick turn to powder & pieces and I think the cat leapt directly up into the trusses of the pole barn. That was impressive; and I didn't see that cat again for a long time.

Fred Ciampi said...

When I was in boot camp in 1960 our Drill Instructor, Sgt. Jim Leverton, would be marching us around the grinder for hours on end and when we weren't doing our COD (Close Order Drill) to perfection he would yell out in his Texas drawl "Woah, herd". (Shit's about to hit the fan). "You finally done it. You finally pissed me off." That would be followed by hours of what can only be described as torture. (I want to thank Sgt. Leverton because that's what made me what I am today).

I told you that to tell you this; The democrats, liberals, BLM, antifa, and all the assorted left wing ass holes are about 0.000387 inches from pissing off approximately 75,000,014 patriots, most of whom are veterans and well trained in causing pain. 'Nuff said. Try to have a nice day, I know I will.

American Cowboy said...

I have to say that while I have no intention of going looking for trouble, I am 100% with the sentiments of Fred on this one.

American C.W.I did not restore the Union by ideas alone. It took blood, limbs lost, death and violence. WW's I&II were not won by the Allies merely with ideas. They were won with blood, limbs lost, death, and violence. There comes a time when all good ideas not only should be, but must be backed up with an appropriate use of and level of violence. That is the case for all of recorded history, and will continue to be for eternity.

Just like the school yard bully who never learns until someone finally has enough and puts the bully on the ground...hard.

Old Cannonballs said...

Great idea, guys! Just what we need -- a civil war of .223 ARs and 30-30 deer rifles against satellite surveillance-targeted death from the sky. And mortars and tactical nukes. You know, the whole over-rated "Peace through Superior Firepower" thing. Unless of course you plan to coordinate your mass piss-off with a mutiny of the entire armed forces. (None of the brass are stooges of the globalists, you know. They're all patriots. Everyone will go along with it. Piece of cake.)

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Readers- Just wanted to assure everyone that I'm right here, hand wrapped in spandex and velcro, but otherwise doing just fine. Fascinating reading here!

Alan said...

Does that station wagon have wood on the sides, I hope?

M. Mitchell Marmel said...

@Alan: No, alas. A 20 year old Taurus. Still runs fairly well, and will run better once I get the catalytic converters unclogged.

Edam Wensleydale said...

@Old Cannonballs: The drone and bomber and ground pilots have families of their own, you know. Even if they DID follow orders to attack their fellow citizens, they have to leave their guarded compounds SOMETIME.

Just sayin'. Someone who's in a fortress is in a prison as well...

Pete (Detroit) said...

3M - Well Said!!
Miss my PTCruiser for just that reason, built on time lord technology, it was approximately 50% bigger on the inside than the outside. The sheer size and quantity of stuff I loaded into that thing still amazes me..

Old Cannonballs - "When in the course of human events"
Imma think some folks are gonna learn about 'consent of the governed' and what it looks like when it's revoked... said...

BINGO - One of your best and you post a lot of good stuff. I'm still believing that God has this under control and the Republic survives n prospers.

Od Cannonballs said...

@ Edam Wensleydale -- good point. Hope the Democrats don't think of inviting in Chinese troops wearing baby blue helmets.

Edam Wensleydale said...

(to a possibly familiar tune)

We look forward
To the day
When they send in
The Blue Berets

'Cause there's one thing
They do not say
Bright blue can be
Seen miles away

Blue beret
Upon their heads
Pull the trig-ger
Now they're dead

You don't need
To spray and pray
You just aim
For the blue beret!


Dan said...

That's nice. And guess what. NONE of those recommendations has EVER resulted in anyone gaining their freedom. Want to be free? Want to enjoy your in HUMAN...rights?

Guess what. You only have the freedom and the rights you will FIGHT for, DIE for and
most importantly KILL FOR!!!!!!

Rod said...

We will all learn how Democrats really feel about pipelines & other peoples' property rights whenever California and their pals in DC identify which fresh water to steal next.

Fish Out of Water said...

@ Stilton: If only things would appear to be so easy. The Obama sock puppet President has apparently decided among other things, he'll channel the other 'Uncle Joe'- Stalin and start a purge of our military ranks. Little does he understand that that would serve to create a core of trained ex-military in the even of a real insurrection.

He also intends apparently to demolish the protections for the unborn and renew the badgering/harassment/persecution of the Little Sisters of the Poor, despite the SCOTUS rulings.

And the beat goes on.

There is rumor Trump may form what he calls the Patriot Party. Dumb idea as doing so will only make the neo fascist democrats even stronger. Perhaps the neo fascist democrats had this in mind and for this reason are determined to nip it at the bud through impeachment?

Oh and to annoy a "progressive-neo fascist, use the word "covfefe' instead of coffee in their presence.

Jack said...

I have always wondered if you were pushing yourself too hard. I am glad that you are getting help. Thanks for all that you do!

SpectreRider said...

None of that would do much to combat an asymmetrical war of attrition with each and every tech lord and politician-D as a target of opportunity and no organization on the part of those looking to capitalize on the opportunities.
Would make being a tech lord or politician much less fun if you were paranoid about exposure to every waiter, entertainer, contractor, or bodyguard, etc. The only necessary condition to be met is for that pissed off 75 million to quietly recognize that those who act against the tyranny are patriots, not nutjobs.

Anonymous said...

Some how refusing to aid and abet the uncivil and immoral in their plan of total world domination mysteriously missing from this list. It is imperative that the civil and moral cease and desist in aid and abetting the democratic banana republic.

M. Mitchell Marmel said...

Er...that, my friend, should be obvious. :)