Friday, August 6, 2021

Have Your Cake and EAT IT Too (2021)

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Why, no - this picture ISN'T Photoshopped. But thanks for asking!

We were really saddened to learn that Barack Obama has had to cut back the size of his 60th alleged birthday party owing to an obscure little thing called "Covid" which he apparently hadn't heard about. The original birthday plan, to be set at Barry's fabulously expensive estate in Martha's Vineyard, was for 500 guests and 200 (count 'em!) servants, who were no doubt looking forward to a day working in the "big house" instead of picking crops in the fields while singing mournful gospel songs.

But too many people noticed that this was basically a giant, flashing sign saying "You're a Dope If You're Still Masking or Still Worrying About Covid." Which is a message Democrats really don't want to spread since Covid panic is currently the most important distraction from Andrew Cuomo's multiple sex crimes.

Barry's birthday party has now been scaled way, way back and will only be for "friends, family, and unindicted co-conspirators." And even though we never got written confirmation, we're pretty sure that we would have been among the 500 guests for the original event. Or at least been disguised as a servant carrying a single, aerodynamically-sound cream pie.

But we're still sending our regards to the aging former president with this Blast from the Past remembrance of a previous birthday...


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According to at least one of his many Social Security cards, Sunday marks the alleged birthday of Barack Barry Hussein Soetoro Obama. The president is turning 52 which, by almost unbelievable coincidence, is also the exact number of weeks each year he lies his butt off, creates dissent, and cripples the American economy! There's one for Ripley's Believe it or Not!

The president has already been presented with a cake by Nancy Pelosi, whom a spokesman described as being "known for her affinity for dark chocolate." We can only pray that this is in reference to the cake itself, and not some personal gift she's planning on sharing with Obama involving lingerie and WD-40.

The birthday boy was able to enjoy not only his own slice of cake, but also an extra slice that was left over because, for reasons still unexplained, Ambassador Chris Stevens failed to show up for the party.

In any event, Hope n' Change Cartoons wants to wish the president the very happiest of birthdays.

Specifically, we "want to" - but can't and won't. Because what we really wish is that his sorry keester would be dragged before several investigating committees which would put him under oath about Benghazi, Fast & Furious, and the IRS attack on conservatives (you know, the scandals that the president and Jay Carney dismiss as being "phony.")

We wish we could ask him why people really can't keep their health insurance policies if they liked them, and why Obamacare is raising costs by preposterous margins and pushing people out of the system instead of in?

We wish we could find out why he hates small businesses and American energy production. We wish we could force him to tell us why he identifies with Trayvon Martin but not the black kids in Chicago being killed by other black kids, why the Ft. Hood massacre was an incident of "workplace violence," and why the White House is closed to ordinary visitors but is still wide open to celebrity galas and five-star (well, maybe one star and one crescent moon) Ramadan dinners?

But none of these wishes is likely to come true. No, this miserable little sheepdip who made his political name by squeaking "present!" in the Illinois Senate will be opening presents from his various sycophants, toadies, and special interest lobbyists.

And of course, he'll be opening a very special present from Hope n' Change Cartoons, too.  And it will look a lot like dark chocolate. Bon appétit!

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Carney draws a line in the sand. Specifically, the sand at Martha's Vineyard.


Michael said...

I've always been a little confused. Is his birthday the day the buzzard laid the egg or the day the egg hatched?

Jim Irre said...

Big Mike will give Barry some dark chocolate for his birthday! SQUEEEEEEEAAAAL like a the pig you are Barry!

Fish Out of Water said...

You've still got it, Stilton! The mention of 200 servants brings imagines of stories read regarding pre-revolutionary France. Martha's Vineyard (never been, never plan to go), again from what I've read of the place is a symbol of coastal elitist hypocrisy.

You still can't figure out why the worst electoral mistake since the peanut farmer from Plains Ga? He's a statist, plain and simple. A distant heir of FDR and perhaps even Woodrow Wilson, who also believes our lives, our economy and our country are too important to be left to the hoi polloi.

Bobo the Hobo said...

Barry hadn’t heard of Covid? Wow, that’s odd; it was in all the papers.

Perhaps there is a super secret birthday bash 2.0 scheduled for those who were ruthlessly cut from the original list. It’s a shame he has to scale back on his guest list but I’m sure he will make sound decisions based on the melanin of his guests … like the certifiably black Yoko Markle and her token evil white-privileged husband.

Anonymous said...



So much for my own birthday wish coming true.

Roger Myers said...

Not to worry about the dis-invited, they will still be able to contribute via the internet with a credit card.

Every time I see one of your posts, my energy level goes up.

TrickyRicky said...

Wow, the Hope n' Change post from 2013 was certainly a blast from the past. Vintage Stilton and vintage Obummer. It really brings into sharp focus the fact that "Biden's administration" is truly Obummer's third term.

Fish Out of Water said...

I also can't help but believe we are looking at a generational difference here. A lack of self-restraint, of couth and above all an overweening element of Facebook level narcissism. Can't recall Bush II or even Slick Willie doing what the worst electoral mistake since the peanut farmer from Plains, Ga had in mind.

Bobo said...

I wouldn’t give 6 cents to help build his library. Maybe Iran will pay for a wing for prayer rug use.

Valvenator said...

Wait, they mummified James Brown and put him next to a fruit cake?

John the Econ said...

Once again, I refuse to be any more scared about the latest iteration of the Wuhan Flu than the "smart people" appear to be. 500 of America's Progressive elite were prepared to party it up with the Obama's an their not-yet-below-sea-level estate. True, I am sure that none of those people were flying in commercial, but still.

Cuomo: What color does one wear in New York State government if they want their breasts grabbed? Asking for a friend.

Colby Muenster said...

Thank you for posting, Stilton!

I wonder how much of Michelle "Let's feed the children" Obama's fruit mountain got thrown in the trash afterwards.

Murphy(AZ) said...

I'd be willing to bet that if one was to set up outside the gates of the O'Bummer McMansion, one could count the 500 guests as they wandered in to pay homage to the (currently) real power behind President *'s throne. Barely and Mooshelle don't want to dis anybody who has given them money (and might give more,) so the actual head count will suddenly freeze at 26 close personal friends.

And we all know that there will be more than one "guest" who doesn't really like the O'Bummers and will take numerous less-than flattering pics of them and the assembled multitudes looking uglier than normal or not wearing masks. Non-alphabet networks will have a treasure trove of things to talk about.

JustaJeepGuy said...

When I read that Barack Hussein was cutting his guest list to "only close friends and family", I knew that that meant all the 5-600 originally invited will still show up, they'll just try to make it appear as though the guest list was cut. There will be security all over the island trying to keep any photos of the hordes of sycophants (and those Barack Hussein is sycophantic toward) out of the press. Can't permit the news media's new messiah (I still won't capitalize those words in reference to the magic negro) to show his feet of clay, you know!

Also, this: "...200 (count 'em!) servants, who were no doubt looking forward to a day working in the "big house" instead of picking crops in the fields while singing mournful gospel songs." is one of @Stilton's very best lines ever!

Average Joe said...

This would be scary as hell if it wasn't true. Is anyone in the US awake or does no one care anymore?

American Cowboy said...

I cannot help believing there is nothing more appropriate than a huge bunch of bananas for those, "humans".

Yeah, I know, doesn't sound very inclusive of me does it?

Pete (Detroit) said...

Good to see you Again, Stilt!
Boy, Democrats, the more they just stay the same, eh?
Wonder of there's any truth to the rumor that Jen Psaki took a mRNA 'vaccination' from Jay Carney to get down teh double speak and flat out bullshitting that is her spiel...

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Michael- Not knowing the law in Kenya, I can't really say.

@Jim Irre- Well THERE'S a mental picture I didn't need today (grin).

@Fish Out of Water- I was frankly amazed to see them still using the politically incorrect term "servants," which paints a patronizingly ugly (but accurate) picture of the elites.

@Bobo the Hobo- Barry doesn't worry about Covid because it has human-to-human transmission, and he's a demi-god. And I'll bet you're right about being a Birthday Bash 2.0 that will be less publicized.

@Anonymous- I see what you did there (grin).

@Roger Myers- Glad you enjoy the posts!

@Shelly- Isn't it interesting how many detestable politicians end up filthy rich? I guess graft, insider trading, and "contributions" add up in a hurry.

@TrickyRicky- I hate to say it, but I think Biden's first (and hopefully last) term is worse then either of Barry's. Although I still dislike Barry more.

@Fish Out of Water- Yep. This kind of self-celebration, especially during a pandemic, is unseemly and tone deaf.

@Bobo- I'd rather Iran donated a wing still attached to a speeding aircraft. (Wait, I didn't say that out loud, did I?!)

@Valvenator- Hey, it was his last wish!

@John the Econ- I'm with you. The (ahem) "elites" have put the lie to this crisis once too often with their behavior.

@Colby Muenster- I'm betting not much of that giant compost heap actually ended up getting eaten.

@Murphy(AZ)- I suspect you're right. Why change the guest list when you can more easily change the PR?

@JustaJeepGuy- Glad you liked the "servants" line. I've got to admit that it was fun to write!

@Average Joe- I think there's quite a few of us who are awake and care, but not enough who hold positions of power. Yet.

@American Cowboy- I find that picture of Michelle and the "fruits & veggies" cake hilarious. And it's 100% real, although the cake was actually for Michelle's birthday some years ago.

@Pete (Detroit)- It's both depressing and a great time-saver that my posts from nearly a decade ago are still relevant today.

Rod said...

Regarding O-Buma's big party: Now THERE was a time when I would have liked having access and knowing how to fly a good crop-spraying aircraft.

JustaJeepGuy said...

Has everyone seen the photo of the gigantic tents set up for Barack Hussein's big party? The biggest one is bigger than the $12 million mansion. Anyone who claims the guest list was "pared down" is a lying sack of s#!t. I am willing to bet that the entire 500 showed up, as I predicted earlier. And we know John "JFK Lite" Kerry flew there in his private jet, too. And we also know that the "news" media will NOT report how many elitist pigs attended. The sanctimonious, self-righteous, oh-so-much-better-than-thou Demo_Rats make me wish for an asteroid to hit that little gathering...

Mad celt said...

There were clowns and pony rides and a pinata shaped like Donald Trump!

Valvenator said...

Mad celt, I have no doubt there were clowns, all 500 plus.

John the Econ said...

We're now living "Animal Farm" in realtime. We are disease-ridden deplorables that need to mask up and be locked down again while they're the "sophisticated, vaccinated crowd" who can go ahead and party on:

NYT reporter slammed for calling Obama’s 60th birthday party low-risk due to ‘sophisticated, vaccinated crowd’

A New York Times reporter is being slammed by critics after opining that former President Barack Obama’s birthday party was a low COVID-19 risk due to the “sophisticated, vaccinated” guest list.

“Yes, it’s a pandemic and a crisis, but let the sophisticated people have their fun!”, tweeted Glenn Greenwald in response.

Indeed. And I remind you again that what we are seeing here today with our social and political betters behavior in the wake of the supposedly ongoing Wuhan Flu crisis is just a preview of more of the same when the Progressives follow up with the "Climate Crisis". You'll be locked down and denied access to fossil fuels in order to save the planet, but these "sophisticated people" will continue to have their fun unabated.

Colby Muenster said...

@John the Econ,

Yup! Just imagine how many of those elitist snobs flew to O'Liar's party in their private jets and entourage of high paid security.

I was trying to imagine what the media and Hollywood reactions would be if Donald Trump held a birthday bash like that. We'd be hearing about the "excess" and "carbon footprint" for months if not years.

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
John the Econ said...

Will someone forward the above to Nancy Pelosi? I think this could help fund the infrastructure bill.

M. Mitchell Marmel said...

One down, umpteen more to go...

John the Econ said...

Savor the multi-level irony: Cuomo enacts a program to fight gender stereotypes and enlist more women into the state patrol. Cuomo then reinforces gender stereotypes by hitting on females in the state patrol as a man in a position of power. Female state patrol enlistee rejects gender stereotype by not acquiescing to Cuomo's aggressions. Hilarity ensues.

JustaJeepGuy said...

One thing about Cuomo's statement really sticks in my craw: his BS about the "line shifting" and "generational change" regarding what is and isn't acceptable behavior. I'm only 5 years older than him and I would NEVER have treated any female employee like he did. He's trash, period. It has nothing to do with his Italian heritage, either. I'm half Italian and he's still completely trash.

John the Econ said...

Yeah @JustaJeepGuy, that was pretty rich. "It's not my fault. It's my generation!" As if we all were grabbing our co-workers T&A as a matter of habit on a daily basis.

Well, perhaps in his insular circle of Democrats that was the case. The rest of us "deplorables", not so much.

And how about CNN's complicity in all of this?

Colby Muenster said...

@John the Econ,
CNN's complicity? Hell, they'll probably hire the scumbag. They could have the Cuomo bookends to prop up the rest of their "professional journalistic reporting."

I guess the next question here is, is New York any better off with Kathy Hochul at the helm? Yes, she's from "upstate," but any Democrat with even the slightest conservative leanings will soon forget those leanings when in power.

John the Econ said...

Here's another Biden success story:

U.S. calls on OPEC and its allies to pump more oil

U.S. President Joe Biden's administration on Wednesday urged OPEC and its allies to boost oil output to tackle rising gasoline prices that they see as a threat to the global economic recovery.

Threat to Democrat's re-election bid in 2022 & 2024, they mean.

Good work, Biden! A mere 2 years after America achieves its near half-century goal of "energy independence", (achieved not through the billions spent by government, but exclusively by the private sector) your administration is now going hat-in-hand to America's enemies begging them to "drill baby, drill!" to save the Democrat's re-election bids next year. Also, keep in mind that at the very same time, they are promoting the "climate crisis" agenda, which is supposed to eliminate fossil fuels. Shouldn't high fossil fuel energy prices be a success story?

And how does OPEC feel about this? "An official from Saudi Arabia, the world’s biggest oil producer, said it was rich that the US was asking for more oil when it's also on a high-profile mission to curb emissions."

And remember, we'll be paying for that oil with inflated American dollars that the Fed has been printing at the behest of Democrats.

Like most of what's happened over the last year, you can't make this up.

Dan said...

Can we establish a winter White House (and Capitol) at GTMO?

Michael Riles said...

Afghanistan has over 1,400 mineral fields, containing barite, chromite, coal, copper, gold, iron ore, lead, natural gas, petroleum, precious and semi-precious stones, salt, sulfur, talc, and zinc, among many other minerals. Gemstones include high-quality emerald, lapis lazuli.

My wet dream reply

To the tune We Need a Little Christmas

Here come the CHINESE
with their razzle dazzle

As they salivate
enter country
as they
extract ALL the above.

That's why they will recognize
the Taliban
and Afghanistan
as Islamic caliphate

Then maybe just maybe
once Taliban get's their tanks,
they'll do a Nassar*

*Nassar of Egypt became buddy buddy with the then USSR, got the Aswan damn out of them thanks to the Soviet Hydroproject Institute and then tossed their atheist asses out.