Monday, January 23, 2023

Stalling Tactics

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Apparently, yet more classified documents entrusted to Joe Biden have turned up in a fifth unsecured location, leading Department of Justice officials to broaden their document search to include "everywhere that a**hole has ever been."

Of course, the real story here isn't that Joe Biden sucks at taking care of critical intelligence documents. Rather, the story is why the DOJ and Biden's own lawyers are pro-actively combing every piece of paper in his possession in the first place? 

There are some (and by "some" I mean me and anyone else who isn't a blithering idiot) who believe this is a desperate attempt to find and destroy evidence of Joe's long history of corrupt deals, bribe-taking, influence peddling, and money laundering  before the Republican congress can finally start pursuing the myriad criminal leads in Hunter Biden's infamous laptop.

Although even as bad as things look at the moment, Biden is not completely without defenders...

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People are understandably excited by new AI technologies like ChatGPT that use super-duper computer intelligence to write about almost anything you ask. And I say "almost" because I thought I would test its sense of humor and my initial attempt didn't go well...

Well, excuse the hell out of MEEeeeee! Allow me to rephrase the question in a way that the computer can understand...

Not exactly comedy gold (my job is safe for now) but at least the technology will work as long as no one ever lets the computer know that Joe Biden = numbskull.


Jess said...

I'm most surprised Biden was allowed to have any piece of paper more important than what is flushed down the toilet. This makes me wonder how incompetent the government actually has become.

Unknown said...

I knew it! When one of the previous discoveries of classified documents was located, they would only say it was in a 'room near the garage.' Leave it to Stilton Jarlsberg to prove that Joe kept 'reading material' in the throne room.

Film at 11…

Bobo the Hobo said...

Shows you just how stupid Biden is - he would have been more successful had he just hired Sandy Berger.

Rod said...

I'm not going to bother; but have you tried it with "Brandon" ?

Jerryskids said...

I'm with Jess, I'm not so much concerned that Biden mishandled classified information as I am at the fact that he ever had access to classified information at all. I know Milley was concerned that Trump had access to the nuclear codes, I can't imagine that anybody would be so foolish as to allow Joe Biden to have access to them.

Neighbor Dave said...

Once again Stilt proves he's smarter than a box 'o bolts. Well done!

Snark said...

Since the President of Vice isn't qualified to classify documents - or anything else in the case of Brandon - any classified documents that reveal his participation in what we know are nefarious events had to be classified by someone else. Whom? His then boss? How deep down THAT rabbit hole would the trail lead? Or, as others have surmised, is this a deep state attempt to dump Ol' Brandon before the next election gets too close?

ChatGPT apparently hasn't gotten the memo that this president IS the joke. And it's on us. I just hope the assholes that voted for him are enjoying all the crap he has foisted on all of us.

M. Mitchell Marmel said...

@Snark: Them bus fumes are getting stronger and stronger...

Principal Poop said...

The classified documents story is the shiny object meant to deflect attention from what's really happening. Stilt, you and Dianny of Patriot Retort are in agreement that his lawyers were scouring all documents to destroy all evidence of the Joementia family business. She lays it all out here and even provides the background material that leads to the obvious conclusion. It is a fascinating read-

Is the Classified Scavenger Hunt a Smokescreen?

Fish Out of Water said...

This makes me wonder just how much more "water" needs to build up before the "dam" bursts.

Colby Muenster said...

Isn't the horse already out of the barn? That is, it has now been widely published that the searches have found multiple classified documents, including some marked Top Secret. It may be a bit tough at this point for the DOJ and FBI to pull an Emily Litella and say, "Never mind!" Of course, we should never underestimate Democrat's abilities to sweep shit under the rug, and get away with it.

That being said, I still think this was planned by the Democrats as a way to get Brandon to step down, clearing the way for someone younger and more left wing. God only know what sort of commie they have in mind to be our next Fuhrer... I mean President. It also wouldn't even surprise me if the classified documents were planted by Joe's handlers.

Is it possible, or even likely that Joe's handlers have been feeding him fake nuke codes and fake "classified" documents all along, just so he'd believe he really is President? Things that make you go "Hmmmm..."

Bus fumes? Nah... they will throw Joe under an electric (i.e. coal powered) bus. Gotta save the environment ya know.

@Principal Poop,

You have provided proof that AI code was written by liberals. We all know they typically lack a sense of humor.

Paul Donohue said...

Good morning, Stilt -

Always a pleasure to see your blogs and strips.

Here are a few more possibilities:
11. To keep a diary of his time in the basement.
12. To use backs of docs to write apology/explanation/threats to Ashley.
13. To clean his 'vette.
14. As presidential gifts to unrecorded visitors of his home.
15. As origami animals to decorate his fish stick and hot dog dinners.

It is, of course, interesting that when his lawyers said that there were no more classified docs, DOJ did a search and found yet more.

I would personally like to know if any of these materials found their way into Biden's books, thus placing him in the position of disseminating classified information to anyone with an extra ten bucks. I am not so interested that I would spend the ten bucks, however.

On the personal side, my "diet" is working. I've now lost 27 pounds in 28 days.

I'm still praying for you and Daughter J. Say "Hi" to Kathy for me when you talk to her later.

TrickyRicky said...

@Principal Poop- Agree 100%, it seems pretty obvious this is the case.

Stilton, you have reinforced my view that AI is over-hyped in the mundane world, while probably horribly evil in the spook infested backrooms of WEF villans.

Paul said...

Yep. Joe Biden is a classic megalomanic. He can do no wrong in his mind therefore he is the most right person in the room. Any room. Just ask him.

What a turd.

Sharon D. said...

Love your post today. So sharp and well said. I agree with you completely.

Anonymous said...

Try using President Trump as the example for the AI joke. Bet it won't be so respectful of the office then...

Linda Lee said...

Well, excuse the hell out of MEEeeeee! Allow me to rephrase the question in a way that the computer can understand...


Anonymous, that is a great idea to use Trump's name instead. Stilton? Could you do that and let us know what you get?

Shelly said...

I still can't wrap my head around the fact that a known corrupt idiot jerk selling influence has been protected so carefully while a real president has been persecuted for years for absolutely nothing. The real president was impeached for what the corrupt idiot jerk bragged about on camera. It's like the vastness of space, I just can't comprehend it.

Dan said...

I'll agree with those who say that the lawyers' search was to find various incriminating stuff before any official search warrants.

I also find it interesting that many "news" reports (including Fox) talk about documents "with classified markings" rather than classified documents.

Gonzo'57 said...

The REAL question here is - How does a guy that spent his entire working career in Congress afford the number of homes he owns? Ya, he's as honest as the day is long.

udaman said...

All that tells me is that artificial intelligence is woke.

John the Econ said...

Why do you think that this document dust-up is happening right now? I'm going to suggest a different hypothesis:

Biden's usefulness to far-left Democrats and the deep state ended after the GOP-controlled House was sworn in. There's going to be no more multi-trillion omnibus spending & pointless stimulus bills. The GOP now controls investigations. Nobody thinks he has any chance of winning in '24. Biden is now just an embarrassing liability that needs to be jettisoned before the 2024 campaign kicks up. Tell me why the instead of burying then ignoring the document scandal just like they Hunter's laptop the MSM is not only reporting on it, but actually comparing it to Trump's document scandal?

Nope. The Biden's are done. The only question is what the Democrats have planned for '24.

ChatGPT: Another tool of the left. Ask it for opinions on various Progressive sacred cows like "gender" and "climate change" and see what you get.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Jess- It really is troubling to think of anything important being entrusted to Joe. Of course, that's always been the case.

@Unknown- On the plus side, Joe has probably gotten a lot of paper cuts in uncomfortable places.

@Bobo the Hobo- What the hell IS it with Democrats mishandling classified material? Sandy Burglar swiping documents, Hillary's private server, Huma Abedin sending classified documents to Anthony Weiner's pedo laptop, and now Biden who has apparently been throwing documents around for decades. It seems like the only guy who knew how to lock things up was Obama when he sealed his college and medical records.

@Rod- ChatGPT still seems to be willing to make fun of people with the name Brandon. For instance, the super-computer came up with this corker: "Why did Brandon cross half the road? He was going to middle school." Go home, computer, you're drunk!

@Jerryskids- Why do I imagine Biden surrounding himself with Post-It notes of the nuclear codes so he doesn't forget them?

@Neighbor Dave- Smarter or "screwier?"

@Snark- I think a lot of people in the intelligence agencies are able to classify documents. So arguably the documents didn't have to come from a source "higher" than the president or vice-president. Although effectively, that DOES make the intelligence agencies more powerful than the president and/or veep.

@M. Mitchell Marmel- There's a lot of room under there - maybe he can take Hunter and Kamala with him.

@Principal Poop- Dianny is always a great read (plus, she's a swell person!). I think she's on to something.

@Fish Out of Water- I don't think the dam is in much danger. Despite appearances, this is still a controlled release of water. Or sewage.

@Colby Muenster- It certainly smells like the powers that be are paving the way for Joe's removal.

@Paul Donohue- This is the difference between computers and humans; the computer stinks at jokes and you're batting a thousand. And you raise a great question about whether classified material has made it into Biden's books. Remember when he blabbed all over TV that it was Seal Team Six that took out Osama bin Laden? And if I recall correctly, in the same broadcast he said that our military didn't get much actionable intelligence from the raid - a secret that, when revealed, surely gave aid and comfort to our nation's enemies.

I could definitely stand to lose a lot more than 27 pounds, but the Donahue Diet is a bit too extreme for me. Thank you for your prayers, I'll say "hi," and know that you and yours are in my rough-hewn prayers nightly.

@TrickyRicky- Frankly, I find the new ChatGPT and similar technologies frightening. Complete idiots will be able to produce things that more or less sound plausible but may lack any sense at all. And readers, deluged with computer-assisted "writing" will learn to accept its lifeless literary monotone. Just like the AI art programs are cutting a swath through real artists, the Chat AI is going to mow down real writers.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Paul- You're right that Joe seems to be constantly aglow with the sheer pleasure of being himself. A megalomaniac indeed.

@Sharon D- Thank you!

@Anonymous- I actually DID try that experiment! I used the same prompt but with Trump's name and rather than being told that the office of the President should not be the subject of joking (as was the case with Biden), it told me that classified documents are too serious to joke about. God help us when the Chat AI figures out how to link to voting machines...

@Linda Lee- Per the comment immediately above, I tried the experiment and got interesting results!

@DougM- Thank you, sir! I'd actually already completed the Kamala cartoon and was going to call it a day when I suddenly thought of Joe passing classified documents in a toilet stall and I couldn't resist slapping it together. I think the two cartoons made nice bookends for the piece!

@Shelly- It's impossible to make sense of that dichotomy and still believe in truth, justice, and a fair implementation of the American way.

@Dan- Theoretically Joe was just going to have some boxes of documents moved. So why have his team of lawyers do that instead of hiring "Two Hunks & A Truck" or some other moving company? None of it is believable.

@Gonzo'57- In 2014, Biden claimed he didn't have a savings account or own any stocks ( So your question about his multiple homes and wealth is a good one. Although I'm sure he actually had tons of bribe money and just lied about it until he could do a couple of book deals to launder the money.

@udaman- Frighteningly, the AI believes what it is programmed to believe. We've seen where that leads with humans and it ain't good.

@John the Econ- As you say, there seems to be a clear effort on the Left to let Biden take the hits on this rather than circling the wagons to protect him. I agree that his usefulness to the power elite is at an end and he's become more of a liability than he's worth. And so he'll be rotated out and our next non-choice will be given power.

Regarding ChatGPT, it's absolutely "woke." Just for fun, I just now posed these questions:

Q: How many genders do cats have?
A: Cats, like most animals, have two genders: male and female.

Then I changed one word...

Q: How many genders do humans have?
A: Traditionally, humans have been thought to have two genders: male and female. However, many cultures and societies have recognized that there is more diversity in gender identity and expression than a binary understanding allows for. Some people identify as a different gender than the one they were assigned at birth, or as no gender at all. Some people may also identify as a combination of genders. Gender is a complex and nuanced aspect of human identity and can be influenced by a wide range of factors including biology, socialization, and personal identity. It is important to respect and recognize the diverse ways in which people understand and express their gender.

If that ain't woke, it's close enough.

Fish Out of Water said...

For those who haven't yet heard, apparently classified documents have been found at the home of former VP Pence as well, which makes the 'raid' on former President Trump's residence even more politically suspect. Further are we seeing a game of misdirection?

Bill said...

I am willing to wager that the Bidens took a charitable tax deduction for their donation of his papers to the Penn-Biden “think tank”.
Many former politicians (including Nixon) donate their papers to a library and receive a legitimate tax deduction for the “fair market value” of the papers. Biden probably did too.
Also, Hunter stated on his gun purchase papers that he paid $49,910 rent to live at the Delaware house. I wonder if that income shows up on Papa’s tax returns.
Does anyone know how to get a copy of the Bidens’ 1998 tax return? When I went to Biden’s web page, I was told he had removed the copy. Maybe someone kept a copy?

Anonymous said...

A few more ways to use those documents:

11. Storing them in a closet with the cleaning supplies.

12. They're a no-streak way to apply wax to your Ferrari.

13. They make great 'test sheets' to practice your photocopying.

14. Wrapping Christmas presents for your overseas 'friends' and 'business partners'.

John the Econ said...

If it makes you feel any better, @Stilton, it seems that ChatCPT is unaware of you:

"Explain "Stilton's Place" to me."

"The website you provided appears to be a personal blog written by an individual named Stilton. The blog features a variety of posts on different topics, including personal reflections, travel stories, and book reviews. Without more information, I cannot provide a specific explanation of "Stilton's Place" as it seems to be a personal blog maintained by a person named Stilton."

Interestingly enough, it was familiar with my dog.

Fish Out of Water said...

@ John the Econ & Stilton

From the WSj

Fish Out of Water said...

I see on my newsfeed this morning Meta will reinstate Trump's account. Bet this is being done not out of the goodness of heart, but on a decision Trump is now politically emasculated and thus, no longer a threat.

John the Econ said...

@Fish Out of Water, it will be interesting where this will lead. At this point, I still consider it more mimicry that "intelligence".

As for the return of Trump on Facebook: Most of the people who want Trump back front-and-center are the media to have something to talk about and Democrats who think he can be used to divide the GOP vote in the runup to the '24 elections. Plus, he drives traffic which Meta doesn't mind.

Fish Out of Water said...

John the Econ: It appears the WSJ also agrees with your assessment.