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Monday, July 17, 2023

Nice Snowing You

stilton’s place, stilton, political, humor, conservative, cartoons, jokes, hope n’ change, snow white, disney, diversity, manson family, woke
Yes, this is real

Our nation has recently been rocked with the twin tragedies of a Hollywood writers' strike and, as of last week, a Hollywood actors' strike. Fortunately, this seems unlikely to impact Disney Studios' latest live-action remake of a classic film, because we see no hint that either writers or actual actors will be involved.

"Snow White" has gone before the cameras, albeit with a Hispanic heroine and no potentially offensive dwarves. Rather, in this version Snow White will be shacking up with one height-challenged individual and six beautifully-diverse homeless drug addicts who were enticed to join the production when offered clean needles and unblemished sidewalks to sh*t on. 

Seriously, this looks more like a production of Snow White Meets the Manson Family, which suddenly is a project I want to seriously think about making after seeing the recent success of the slasher film "Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey."

And you can forget all of that Sleepy, Sneezy, Doc, Dopey, Comet, Blitzen, and Garfunkel nonsense. No, this outfit is Mr. Big, Rolando, They/Them, Pud, Glory Hole, LaQueefa, and Flatline. The jolly songs practically write themselves! And it seems way more likely that they'll be mining for crystal meth instead of diamonds.

While I wish Disney every success for this very, very socially responsible updating of a bigoted fairytale that cruelly stereotyped Little People as hardworking heroes with big hearts, I can't help but worry that the box office may be negatively impacted by the impending Hollywood audience strike scheduled for opening day.

UPDATE: After receiving considerable backlash online, Disney issued a statement that the cast photo seen above is "fake." They wish. They have since had to admit that the photo is 100% accurate, but that its release wasn't official.

SERVICING SECRETS

• So the Secret Service has announced that they've ended their investigation into the cocaine found at the White House because there are no clues other than video footage, sign-in logs, a multitude of guards executing tight security protocols, access to unlimited forensic technology, and the presence of at least one notable drug addict in the mix.

The Secret Service miraculously brought the list of suspects down to 500 people, but decided it wasn't worth the time and effort of interviewing anyone because the amount of cocaine would only be a misdemeanor offense anyway. Which I find hard to believe.

Would it have been a misdemeanor for someone who is currently not in jail only because of his last name and a sworn oath to a judge to keep his nose clean (literally)? Is it really just a misdemeanor to bring controlled substances into the frickin' White House? Does the Secret Service have no concerns about one or more of their agents being high on cocaine on the job? Should no one be worried about White House staffers with pinpoint pupils and powdered nostrils in close proximity to a fragile 80-year-old president?

Sadly, it now appears that the only purpose of the Secret Service is to protect the secrets of the corrupt.

WOULD YOU LIKE FAVA BEANS WITH THAT?

• There's certainly nothing wrong with Joe Biden lasciviously nibbling on a terrified tot before going in for a grandfatherly French kiss, right? Right...?


37 comments:

Mike aka Proof said...

"Snow Light Brown" has a nice ring to it!

Julian said...

Biden whispered to the terrified child, "If ONLY you were a little older, you could come shower with me and meet Mister Dingdong! My daughter loved that game!"
As for the Disney abomination, it really does look like a collection of happy meth freaks following a female to rob and rape while singing catchy tunes! You nailed it with your summary. My suggested names would be Sleazy, Cokey, Pukey, Syphi, FroFro, Poxxy and Crabs.
Fun for the whole family if the whole family is made up of inbred, mentally ill, post lobotomy degenerates and politicians. Or do I repeat myself?

The Overgrown Hobbit said...

As a funnier man than I wrote. "That's Snow White & ONE dwarf. Can't you poolnoodles count?"

Bones said...

I can't think of any way the screenwriters and actors strike will impact MY life so let them carry on and ruin their own future.Just because the secretive sevice has the best resouces in the world you can't expect them to solve everything,can you.Would the Blow,sorry Snow White situation be set in a Whore house?With the success of "Sound of Freedom'Snowy could be a crack mother to ageing trafficked children,discounts available for the top brass and CEO's.

Fish Out of Water said...

https://youtu.be/9QTKoJ2ZUG

Elbarto said...

“When the law no longer protects you from the corrupt, but protects the corrupt from you – you know your nation is doomed.” – Ayn Rand

Anonymous said...

Stilton......
Truly terrifying and extremely depressing. The lunatics are running the asylum. Will sanity ever return?
Pray for America!!

Wayne In Indiana

Unknown said...

hey gotta have meth-heads working in the movies. Where else is Hunter and his suppliers gonna get a real job where he has some actual experience.

Kencor said...

In a world where "normal" and "insane" now share the same definition, nothing is surprising.

TrickyRicky said...

Hollywood...who cares? Normies have been voting with their feet for quite a while.

White House cocaine...did anyone expect a different outcome? If so, why?

Biden the pedophile...our emperor is simply a sign of the end of our bread and circuses charade.

M. Mitchell Marmel said...

About all I can do is this:

https://sta.sh/01b0qepmczf0

Something simply HAS to snap. And it isn't going to be pretty when it does.

Fred Ciampi said...

As anon said "The lunatics are running the asylum". Why do folks like Dizzy Studios spoil a perfectly good imaginary story and 're-make' it into something gross and stupid? Remember "1984"? In it the gubbermint et al were changing history and a lot more. It seems that our current crop of blue people are trying to do just that. "In is out, black is white, on is off, etcetera."

The secret service can't find a suspect?!?!?! I call bull poo. Put Gibbs, Abby, Ducky, and the rest on it and they'll have it solved before the second commercial. Hey, here's a thought; Put N.C.I.S. and Mission, Impossible together and they will have every crime ever committed in the US solved in under three days. Of course, we all know that Joe's puppet masters told the SS to back off. (That was 'back")

That's enough for today, now I'll sit back and watch for the black SUVs to come up my driveway.

Anonymous said...

Always a treat when you post!

Another one that made me chuckle was "Off White & the 7 Dorks"

Linda Lee said...

And the mother holding the child pulls out her phone instead of slapping him silly?

rickn8or said...

Fred, hell, put Fred, Daphne, Velma Shaggy and Scooby Doo on it.
Right now, the Secret Service and FBI have less credibility than they did after the Kennedy assasinations.

Sandra Gray said...

I nearly could not believe that disney would do such a stupid thing, so I searched for "disney live action" and there it was!!! And mamas are still taking their young 'uns to disney world.
What a bunch of maroons!!
P. S. Sorry, Stilt, for second-guessing you

Dan said...

Loved your old and new names for the Seven Associates.

Joe Drypowda said...

Such a fun day to start my week.....Thanks !!

Shelly said...

This all started with the seemingly innocuous phrase "social justice." Who wouldn't want to support something so lovely. Just like everything else they do, they deceive with pretty little catch phrases like abortion is "reproductive healthcare" and making Frankenstein monsters out of minors is "gender affirming care." It's not enough that they've taken over every major institution in the country. They are never satisfied. God, what will the next thing be?

M. Mitchell Marmel said...

@Shelly: Lots and lots of heads on stakes. But only if we're quite lucky.

Anonymous said...

Sonw White and the seven idiots just does not have the same ring to it.

Anonymous said...

Ayn Rand Was Right!!
As For Snow whatEver! I Too Am Agast!!

jayjay said...

Stop the world, I want to get off!

Colby Muenster said...

Disney managed to ruin the Star Wars franchise, so why not start doing the same to their own beloved classics? What's next? Sleeping Ugly? The Large Mermaid? Cinderfella? Tranny and the Tranp? Herbie the Gay Bug? Gonna be awesome when Donald Duck sells his nephews into a sex ring. Bah... As many have said here, Disney has already alienated their base, and is paying the price. Walt is spinning in his grave. I hope they go belly up, or better yet, Elon Musk buys them for pennies on the 100 dollar.

Hollyweird strike... If only it could last forever!

Coke in the White House... It's painfully obvious the evidence pointed to a staffer or even a Biden, so it's now a non-investigation. Imagine if this would have happened under Trump.

Rod said...

Taking a powder at the white house: Can't find the owner and can't keep it. So WTH; just give it back to Hunter.

John the Econ said...

Hollywood should be scared. After all, what if the actors and writers go on strike and it turns out that nobody outside of Hollywood cares? I know that Mrs. Econ and I will not. Hollywood wrote us off decades ago.

Bring on the AI. I mean, it can't do much worse. Considering that most of what Hollywood is doing anymore is just recycling old scripts instead of doing anything original, I'm sure that AI is more than up to that job.

Not Hunting for the Obvious: As I've been saying since the inauguration, Hunter is officially an "untouchable". We knew the Secret Service was corrupted when they went on a mission to bury Hunter's felony-laden 4473. Just add them to the long list of government agencies (including the US military) that have prostrated and beclowned themselves to the corruption and mediocrity. I don't think there are any credible agencies left, are there? Maybe the DMV?

Exposing your children to a Biden should be considered child abuse.

Anonymous said...

Maybe the cocaine was by (wait for it) Cocaine Bear!

Gee M said...

Barely...

Allen said...

disney had actually hired a bunch of "little people" for the dwarf roles. then peter dinklage opened his stupid mouth. he has his fame, and he's pulling the ladder up behind him.

https://www.indiewire.com/features/general/peter-dinklage-snow-white-and-the-seven-dwarfs-backlash-little-people-1234695983/

John the Econ said...

Peter Dinklage is an angry elf.

Dpdionne62@gmail.com said...

A little off topic but I was doing a search a word puzzle when I had a "a ha moment"!
The words that I was looking for were types of cheeses. Two of the words were "Stilton" and "Jarlsberg". I have been following your blog for several years. I didn't realize the coordination of your name and the types of cheeses. Hence the A HA moment!

John the Econ said...

@Fish Out of Water, the reality is that EVs will largely remain expensive toys for the wealthy virtue signaling set for the foreseeable future. The perfect scenario for an EV is for someone who regularly commutes a nominal distance 1/2 of the vehicle's maximum range on a daily basis and can recharge at at home overnight.

Years ago, I considered leasing an EV with an 80 mile range for Mrs. Econ who was looking at getting a job downtown with a 20-mile round trip. We could easily recharge it on a standard 120V outlet overnight. The federal and state rebates made the lease literally zero-net cost. (We declined doing so for other reasons)

Beyond that, "range anxiety" ruins the experience. Nobody wants to deal with the stress and inconvenience of finding and then waiting at an EV charging station away from home. If you live in an apartment or other dwelling without dedicated parking and access to power, then EV ownership is not going to be convenient for you. In other words, EV ownership is going to remain a decent experience only for the wealthy, as it has been.

Oh, and in areas where the base-load power for the grid has transitioned from carbon-based to wind and solar, overnight charging at cheap rates will no longer be a thing. So there goes that convenience as well.

Because of the range anxiety issue, EV manufacturers primarily make only large, heavy and expensive EVs to accommodate the large batteries required. And because of that, EV subsidies will continue to largely benefit the wealthy at the expensive of the not-wealthy, considering that most additional federal spending anymore is financed via inflation instead of taxes.

Edam Wensleydale said...

@DPDionne: More than one of us have adopted 'cheesy' nicknames in Stilton's honour... ;D

Brie Camembert said...

@Edam Wensleydale
Yup! (or should I say "Oui"?)

Murphy(AZ) said...

Is this a cheese blog? Or just a cheesy blog. I wouldn't miss it for the world.

Colby Muenster said...

@Murphy(AZ),

I consider myself pretty cheesy.

Roger Myers said...

RANDOM THOUGHTS

• "Try That In A Small Town" song - I like it and screw anyone who says it's racist.


I'm with you on _ screw anyone who says it's racist.
But the song sucks, like all modern country music. It would be better served if done by Travis Tritt or
Hank Jr

.Roger Myers