Wednesday, September 27, 2017

Jerry Skids

stilton’s place, stilton, political, humor, conservative, cartoons, jokes, hope n’ change, dallas cowboys, taking the knee, jerry jones, spineless, coward, national anthem, michael brown, BLM, hands up, don't shoot

While it's unlikely that the Dallas Cowboys will be winning titles anytime soon, on Monday night they did succeed in rebranding themselves as the new Rockettes of Virtue Signaling by having the entire team, including owner Jerry Jones, come out and kneel on the field just before the playing of the national anthem.

They seemed to assume that as long as the anthem isn't playing, it's a perfectly good time for an entire franchise to shove their politics in fans faces while simultaneously declaring their hatred of the police (five of whom were brutally murdered in Dallas while protecting the rights of anti-police protesters) and their sneering disdain for what they perceive to be an unpleasantly patriotic President of the United States.

Jones claimed that the social justice curtsy was performed as a show of unity and solidarity - but unity with who and solidarity with what cause? No one seems to be quite sure at this point...but it's not really even important in an environment which now sees virtue signaling as more important than virtue itself.

And let's not forget how all of this nonsense started...

Following the death of Michael "Gentle Giant" Brown in Ferguson, the narrative was that this big, lovable lug was just ambling down the street when a foam-flecked racist white cop decided to execute him, perhaps with the intent of making a rug.

The actual facts showed that Brown had just committed a strong arm robbery and physical assault, then attacked the police officer and tried to grab his gun before attaining glorious martyrdom face down on the sizzling pavement.

The police officer was subsequently cleared of any wrongdoing (including by federal investigators who were doing their damnedest to find anything), but virtue signalers in politics, news, and entertainment kept doing the "hands up" boogie anyway, as surely as they're now taking the knee in furtherance of a lie that too many people - including the dimwitted Colin Kaepernick - still believe to be true.

Not that it's surprising: after all, Barack Obama DID stand in the well of the United Nations and declare that this incident alone made our nation the moral equivalent of the worst human rights offenders on Earth.

In actual fact, this whole stupid Kabuki act has far more to do with the lingering poison of social arsonist Barack Obama and the usual strident race-baiters than anything Donald Trump has done or said.

The good news is that in our low-attention span society, this will probably all pass within a week. The bad news is that something even dumber is likely to replace it.


A new study (as if we didn't already have enough old studies) suggests that psychopaths prefer rap music to classical, which would tempt us to say "Duh!" if we weren't reticent about honking off psychopaths.

This information could be useful in case you're planning a party with an abundance of psychopaths on the list (say, a Democratic fundraiser) and are trying to decide whether your playlist should lean more heavily on "Eine Kleine Nachtmusik," or whatever popular wham-bam, kill the cops, f*ck the hoes, brain-damaged monosyllabic tribal chant is currently thudding out of oversized (and quite likely stolen) car speakers.


Jim G. said...


You nailed it with the Jerry Jones cartoon. I'm still laughing! The reason it's so funny, is because it's so true!

Glad to see you're "back in the saddle".

Jim G.

pdwalker said...

It's funny. I was walking through the local substation humming along to "The Blue Danube" that was playing over the speaker system.

It took me a moment to realize I was doing it and thought just how nice that was.

Rap? What is it good for? absolutely nuttin! Say it again....

Velveeta Processed Cheese Food said...

Stilt, glad you seem to have turned the corner on the creeping crud.

RAP said...

Very cutting, clever, and humorous--every bit.

Mike aka Proof said...

The Cowboys have gone from being "America's Team" to "America is teeming with racism".
Way to go, Jerry. For a minute there, I thought you had a backbone!

james daily said...

Wow. You touched a nerve with this edition. This whole mess could have been avoided had the NFL did their job when the SF QB did his First Knee job. They let that slide and this is what it has slid into. On JJ: He is a liar of the first water and this is just another example. But Stilt, you already have put up with his antics as long as me. He too has qualities of a sociopath. Lastly, I always liked Al Jolson.

REM1875 said...

Excellent doc -- you need more sick time so you can come back with a vengeance.....Get your head out of the paint buckets now and go back to clan mcgregor......

Buddha said...

Just maybe your best post ever!

Earl Allison said...

As has been said before at Ace of Spades HQ, the thing I loved the most about the Obama Presidency was all the racial healing ...

No more than that need be said -- Obama set race relations back the better part of a century, and THAT should be a big part of his legacy.

Anonymous said...

The NFL’s operations manual, which, unlike its rule book, is not available to the public, states:

“During the National Anthem, players on the field and bench area should stand at attention, face the flag, hold helmets in their left hand, and refrain from talking. The home team should ensure that the American flag is in good condition. It should be pointed out to players and coaches that we continue to be judged by the public in this area of respect for the flag and our country. Failure to be on the field by the start of the National Anthem may result in discipline, such as fines, suspensions, and/or the forfeiture of draft choice(s) for violations of the above, including first offenses.”

The Prosecution rests your Honor.

Anonymous said...

The NFL's official response was pathetically tone-deaf and could have been written by the NFL players union. Heck, maybe it was.

NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell castigated Trump for his "divisive comments" and "an unfortunate lack of respect for the NFL."

Lack of respect for the NFL? What about respect for the nation's flag and its anthem, and for those who died defending them and what they stand for? What about respect for your own fans, many of whom still believe that America, though not perfect, is the greatest country on Earth? It's no wonder that many of the protests were met with a chorus of boos.

Nor is this, as many self-righteously claim, a matter of "free speech." NFL football players have the right to express what they believe, however odious or wrong it may be. But businesses have a right not to employ those who intentionally damage their businesses by reckless behavior and comments. The idea that NFL millionaires have special rights, unlike the rest of us, that let them ruin the very businesses that employ them tells you how out of touch they are with basic civics and responsibility.

Anonymous said...

Punch them in the pocketbook. No support for their sponsors.

Gatorade (PepsiCo)
Campbell’s Soup
Frito-Lay (PepsiCo)
Mars Snackfood
Pepsi (PepsiCo)
Dairy Management Inc.
Gillette/Head & Shoulders/
Vicks/Old Spice (Procter & Gamble)
Papa John’s
Courtyard by Marriot
Xbox (Microsoft)
Quaker Oats (PepsiCo)
Tide/Duracell (Procter & Gamble)
Surface/Windows (Microsoft)
CoverGirl (Procter & Gamble)
Zebra Technologies
TD Ameritrade
Extreme Networks
Nationwide Insurance

Unknown said...

Welcome Back! I now believe your purpose in life is to be a perpetual stone in Obama's shoe. Well done!

Bobo the Hobo said...

NFL Inc is not going to discipline players at this time which is ironic, seeing as how they own them. I cannot discern whether it is White Guilt or actual fear their players may turn on them and beat the living snot out of the owners.

Also, welcome back, Stilt! Glad to see you are above the sod, not below.

Unknown said...

Stilt, glad you're on the mend. Take a knee! Yeah, those bastards should take a knee to the family jewels. I ,for one, am done with the NFL.

Easygo said...

What I find really scary is how on earth did you come up with that video? Is that what you were surfing during your down time?

Glad to see you are in back in perfect form!

Judi King said...

OMG. That video is unbelievable! They need to go back to the jungle.

Bill said...

Hello Stilton,

You hit a home run on this one.

Your article is a keeper.

Thank you,
Bill Moore

Geoff King said...

Since none of the overpaid braindead brutes in the NFL have the (foot)balls to exercise their 1st Ammendment rights on their own time, as they most likely could not be able to come up with a valid reason for their so-called protest, perhaps even a small level of boycotting will scare the team owners back to reality.
I just read where Direct TV is now offering a full refund to anyone who purchased their NFL package if they disagree with the protesters. That is a good start to "clipping" them in the wallet, and turning the whole season into a "long bomb".

Fred Ciampi said...

I keep hearing so loud and so often that all white men are racist that I am wondering if it's true. Think Joseph Goebbels.

I am looking forward to a picture of an NFL stadium where there is only one person in the stands during a game and he is just looking under the stands for lost change.

Maybe it's time for a new sport such as 43 Man Squamish..................

Sortahwitte said...

Jerry should run for congress. That's where all the senile old farts, black and white, reside.

Glad to see and read that you have the old spunk back. No, I don't want to know what a spunkback is. On a happy note, last week my partner (we've been married 49 years) and I traveled to Wichita, Kansas on a mission to buy ammo. While there we went to a "grocery store" that had over 100 varieties of cheese. Looky there said the okie. Stilton cheese. I had to buy some. Just like you, it was nutty, sharp, unpretentious, and smelled like old socks. All in all, just great. What a wonderful, wonderful world.

Kate said...

"Music is like candy - throw away the rapper."

Igor said...

1) you mis-labelled the title, it really SHOULD be "Jerry's kids". There acting like kids...
2) Rap music is misspelled, it should be thusly: (c)rap music
3) Thanks, Anonymous, now I have to change cell phone carriers, along with a list of places to avoid that I liked going to. Pretty soon, I won't have anywhere to shop!
4)The National Felons League sure knows how to shoot themselves in the foot, eh?
5)Good to see you're back in fine form! We need humor. Lots and lots of humor, lately...
6) Did you see where the Taliban tried to send a greeting to Mad Dog Mattis?

"Keep calm, and carry on"

TrickyRicky said...

Tremendous post today Stilton, firing on all cylinders again. As for the Hands Up, Don't Shoot narrative, there is a crowd-funded play which addresses what REALLY happened with regards to Michael Brown's unfortunate interaction with law enforcement. The dialogue is entirely from the grand jury testimony. I contributed when it first came to my attention over a year ago. The original production in Los Angeles had many actors quit when they found that the truth of the matter did not fit their narrative (H-U-D-S). The creators have another funding drive to bring the play to NYC. If anyone in this group of cheeseheads is interested in checking it out, here is the link. I personally think this effort to ACTUALLY "expand the dialogue" could be quite interesting, should it gain any traction in the Big Apple.

Dick said...

Great post Stilton. I'm especially fond of:
"or whatever popular wham-bam, kill the cops, f*ck the hoes, brain-damaged monosyllabic tribal chant is currently thudding out of oversized (and quite likely stolen) car speakers."

That's a classic.

Unknown said...

My father was a die-hard Chargers fan. When I was a young girl, around 10 years old, he would take me to the old Balboa Stadium to watch their games. The now-defunct Qualcomm Stadium wasn't built yet. Football represents (or should) the good old American way, like tailgating with your friends before the game, wearing your favorite team's colors, and rooting them on, even if they are losing by a lot. You back your team, period, the same way you back and honor your country. It all started for me when the S.D. Chargers became the L.A. Chargers. My hometown team were no longer. My dad's hopes of seeing them win a Superbowl were dashed. Life is not the same. I am furious that the protests have morphed into this cancer that is overpowering the players. I would bet that most of them don't know why they are kneeling in the first place. Mob mentality, I suppose. I will boycott everything I can that gives $$$ supporting these fools. America is changing so quickly and this is very dangerous. I know it makes us look weak in the eyes of our enemies. That's all they need and as the numbers of protesters increase, the weaker we look to "Rocket Man" and other terrorists. Don't they realize that further division of the country is what these enemies want? We need to instead band together and stand as one to protect our country and its flag by paying respect to both. I pray this will end soon, but I fear it will only escalate. Football is ruined for me. I pray for our country.

Stan da Man said...

Stilt, welcome back, GLAD you're back and feeling feisty...
A week or two ago, JJones came out w/ statement "No Cowboy will kneel for the Anthem. Period." and reaction was, Jeeze, for a total d-bag, he got the right of it for once...
Then this. Nope. Still a D-Bag after all.

Buddy's boobs are fookin' bigger than his HAID!!!!
He makes the other fat guy look normal sized!
Got to wonder how he crams enough pie through his hole! Does not seem to be enough time in the day!

Over at Johnny, all the obvious lines were political, Politicians w/ w/o various anatomical features (Spine / heart / testicles) or leftovers from previous state sponsored surgery (Oh, look - a welfare sponge!)
Glad I finally came up w/ one I could use, even if I did bruise the delivery...

Shelly said...

Because Trump spoke out loudly, however brash it was, to this godawful situation in the NFL, they were gleefully able to turn it around as a protest against him, which all lefties are prone to do on a daily basis. He was angry and I am angry that these protests have been allowed to mushroom without recognizing the thing they are protesting is an outright lie. Therefore, they are condemning the entire patriotic nation as racists. The statistics don't lie. Black men are not being singled out by racist white police. Just because a few incidents of white cop (justified) shootings of black men make a lot of noise in the media doesn't make this lie true. This whole racial thing, from the confederate monuments to supposed mass racism in America, is dangerous and disgusting. I personally believe we can thank Obama for the mess we're in. He destroyed the years of working toward racial harmony that preceded him. That is his true legacy.

Pete (Detroit) said...

Rumor has it, season ticket holders are considering a class action lawsuit for a refund...

Cookie said...

Way to go today! Nailed it all. Well done, really well done.

John the Econ said...

"...what cause?"

Exactly. While everyone obsesses over all the kneeling, nobody is articulating what all this kneeling is really about. But remember, these are Progressives we are talking about. Fealty to the agenda is more important than whatever the agenda is about. In fact, they just assume you don't think too hard about all of that because it quickly falls apart should one actually try.

Is it because America is such an awful place for non-white people? I know that's not true, because one of the biggest problems we're now facing is immigration, largely by non-white people from all around the globe who are literally dying trying to get to our shores.

Is it because cops are discriminately killing black citizens? We know that's not true; A black citizen is more likely to get struck by lightning than shot by a cop, and much more likely to be killed by a fellow black citizen than anything else.

No, it's all about virtue signalling by a bunch of guys who are just smart enough to know that at the end of the day, they're just a bunch of well-enumerated entertainers paid to run around a field for our amusement. Just like Hollywood celebrities and the phony social justice warriors oozing all over college campuses, these highly privileged individuals know deep down that they really are the blessed ones, and so they feel they have to go on these crusades to scream about supposed injustice, not-so-subtly trying to say that because they say they care, they are worthy of their privilege.

Our former President is one of the best/worst examples.

Unfortunately, it's going to get sillier before it goes away:

"After an impressive toe-tap catch in the back of the end zone, Beckham Jr. drew a flag for pretending like he was peeing on the Lincoln Financial Field surface."

Since there has been minimal personal repercussions of the behavior, the players are going to continue to push the boundaries of behavior until there is a substantial pushback. It will be interesting to see how far it goes, or who is going to break first. Who's going to be the first racist white authority figure to censure a player for literally acting like a dog? And if that doesn't happen, what will the next outrageous behavior be?

John the Econ said...

"...psychopaths prefer rap music to classical..."

True story:

Years ago when I was still a road warrior, I arrived at an airport for an early morning flight. Wanting to have something in my stomach before boarding, I stepped into a McDonalds for a muffin and orange juice. Standing in line, I found myself being assaulted by blaringly loud rap music. I literally noticed my mood quickly change from merely being tired, to annoyed, then to irate, and then to actually angry, for no obvious reason other than as a visceral reaction to the annoying music. I literally felt like I wanted to punch somebody! And if I could have found the individual responsible for the 100-decibel rap music in an airport restaurant at 6 in the morning, I likely would have.

And the "music" didn't seem to make the employees any more efficient. If anything, they were slower than usual. Nobody else in that line looked all that happy either. (Although, a 5-something AM, who is happy in an airport?) I wonder how easy it would have been to have started a riot at that moment.

I spent the better part of the flight home contemplating what had happened. Other than being tired from a long work week on the road, I wasn't in a particularly bad mood when I entered the restaurant. If anything, I was looking forward to being home. The music had definitely altered my mood, and not for the better.

The next day, I related this story to a friend who was an executive in the hospitality industry. (and had no relation to McDonalds) She was so outraged by my experience that she actually wrote a letter about my incident to McDonald's corporate offices. The next time I was in that airport, the rap music was gone.

So yes, I am not the least bit surprised that it's been documented that psychopaths prefer rap music. In a mere 100 seconds, rap music got me at least half-way to becoming one.

Joe Jetson said... if anyone needed another reason to hate the Cowboys.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Readers- Wow, what a response today! I haven't been able to check in because of remodeling chores (I'm starting to work on the wire spaghetti flailing from the home entertainment center) and now there's no way I can catch up or comment on everything above, other than to say there are a LOT of good points being made!

Pete (Detroit) said...

@John the Econ (yes. I give up, and may start using the silly worthless '@'...)
in re pushback - it's going to be interesting to see what happens in Green Bay tonight... Aaron Rodgers has requested fans link arms during the Anthem, to show support w/ the team. I wonder a) how many fans will show up ("Should" be a sold out game) b) will the fans there link arms? c) what will be the level of BOO!!!ing???
People in NFL need to get the message loud and clear, people are PISSED, swearing off ever watching / spending money EVER again. And more will join every week. Former fans are pressuring sponsors to pull ads, cancelling accounts w/ USAA and deciding that "Buttwiper" really is crap beer after all. We're in MN this week, or it would be REAL tempting to go picket the stadium...

In Re annoying music being annoying..
In my sword school, they make playlists of fast, hard thrash metal as 'fight music' which they then proceed to play way too loud, in MY arrogant opinion. REALLY pisses me OFF. As planned. There is a reason that (c)rap music is not about healthy relationships, good parenting, good grades, or ANY kind of success...

Off Topic - RIP Hugh Heffner - Regardless how you feel about him / his magazine, he certainly left a mark on the world...

Bruce Bleu said...

But, Stilton... i'm confused... between Joe Biteme singing "Swanee" and "wham-bam, kill the cops, f*ck the hoes, brain-damaged monosyllabic tribal chant is currently thudding out of oversized (and quite likely stolen) car speakers.", what do you REALLY think?