|For once, we can't fault his logic|
First, it turned out that Russia is actually interfering by trying to help Bernie Sanders' campaign. Second, Bernie had a surprisingly (indeed, almost suspiciously) large primary win in Nevada thanks to a large plurality of vodka-scented voters.
Of course, the mainstream media is now calling Bernie's win a fake and a fraud, and American intelligence agencies are planting spies in the Sanders' campaign team and opening multiple investigations with an eye towards prison sentences for Comrade Bernie and all of his co-conspirators.
Just kidding! That's what was done to Donald Trump! Instead, Bernie's campaign was politely informed of the possible Russian interference (a courtesy never extended to Trump), after which Bernie blustered publicly that he doesn't want that kind of help and that there will be "big trouble" if the Russians don't cut it out "right after election day."
In other Sanders-related news, once again there's proof of the old political adage: "As goes Danny DeVito, so goes Dick Van Dyke." The beloved (and that definitely includes our feelings for him) 94 year old comic actor has recently been featured in a Youtube campaign ad to address concerns about the wild-haired socialist's advanced age...