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Wednesday, May 16, 2018

Picture If You Will...

Our title today is a tip of the hat to Rod Serling's wonderful "Twilight Zone," a place that you're in right now owing to the fact that we didn't want to get into politics today (seriously, there's not much fun to be had with the violence in Israel, CIA leakers, or Melania Trump's kidney woes) but we also needed some kind of content for today's post.

And by now, you know what that means (cue creepy "Twilight Zone" music)...Earwigs!

Today we've got another sprinkling of cartoons from years and years ago, back when we were still writing just one punchline for a piece of clipart rather than seeing how many different angles we could come up with before our brain, like a forcibly wrung dish towel, finally drip-drip-dripped to a halt.

So in no particular order, for no particular reason, and with no discernible logic, here they are. Enjoy!



stilton’s place, stilton, political, humor, conservative, cartoons, jokes, hope n’ change, earwigs

stilton’s place, stilton, political, humor, conservative, cartoons, jokes, hope n’ change, earwigs

stilton’s place, stilton, political, humor, conservative, cartoons, jokes, hope n’ change, earwigs

stilton’s place, stilton, political, humor, conservative, cartoons, jokes, hope n’ change, earwigs

stilton’s place, stilton, political, humor, conservative, cartoons, jokes, hope n’ change, earwigs


9 comments:

TrickyRicky said...

The cruel step-zither reminds me of the soundtrack to "The Third Man".

Igor said...

"I'm all in a dither as to what to name my zither."

DougM said...

Zither:
• Sarah's dad went to Rome, and all she got was this lousy "Mouth of Truth" souvenir.
• Sarah rehearses a TV infomercial for her Giant Slicer Thing.

Snake:
• Harvey resented that he'd never be able to read the news on the air in person because of his terrible lisp.
• Harvey wrote yet another letter to the editor decrying the younger generation's evolutionary slide into limblessness.

Window:
• Nevil Shute gets a great idea for a plot device for his new novel "On the Beach."
• Nevil clearly never watched horror movies, or he'd know to get the heck out'a there!

King:
• Wesley IV believed that it all rolled downhill, literally.
• Wesley IV finally read the terms and conditions on his Royal King job contract.

Piano:
• Miranda always giggled when someone called it a "stool."
• Miranda loved playing at weddings and birthdays, except for the getting thrown out because she wasn't invited part.
• Harvey liked to kick back, relax, sing, and wear something with a plunging bodice when he was alone.

(Yeah, I'm done. Thanks, Stilton.)

DougM said...

Oops, missed Santa:
• Ol' St Nick's so blotto, he had Uber drop 'im off at the South Pole.
• Oh, dear, me. That boy needs a manicure in the worst way.
• So, uhm, if he's dead, howzcome his halo still works?

Colby Muenster said...

Good ones, Stilton, and I especially liked the lawyer one! You too Doug M! "... terrible lisp." Harf!

Dan said...

Re: Santa -- is he Popeye Santa? Looks like an open can of spinach down by his left hand.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@TrickyRicky- Who knew, prior to "The Third Man," that a zither could be so creepy?

@Igor- That can be the cause of much strum und drang.

@Doug M- Well played, sir!

@Coldy Muenster- My feelings about lawyers are based on personal experience.

@Dan- Y'know, I have no clue what the story is behind that empty can. Maybe a coiled-spring snake rocketed out of that thing and gave poor old St. Nick a coronary.

DougM said...

^ Your visual puns are kind'a like set shots in volleyball.
Now help me untangle myself from this net.

zippidee said...

by the way, I don't think that it's abstinance from an activity that induces blindness - fyi