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Monday, March 22, 2021

"Climb It" Change?

stilton’s place, stilton, political, humor, conservative, cartoons, jokes, hope n’ change, biden, fall, steps, stairs, windy, asshole

Kamala Harris moved several steps closer to the Oval Office on Friday, when Joe "Watch This!" Biden failed to negotiate several steps on his way up to Air Force One.

Biden stumbled three times before making it to the top, which we wouldn't normally make fun of if it weren't for the fact that Joe prides himself on running up steep inclines, along with the lamest White House excuse ever: "It was windy."

If that excuse sticks, we expect to be hearing it a lot in future White House briefings...

Q: How do you account for the tens of thousands of illegals coming across our border?
A: It was windy.

Q: How did the Covid Relief package get blown up into funding every single Progressive wish?
A: It was windy.

Q: Why did wind power fail in Texas a few weeks ago even though it was windy?
A: Racism.

FROM THE VAULT:  SOCIALIST CLIMBER (Aug 10, 2016)

obama, obama jokes, political, humor, cartoon, conservative, hope n' change, hope and change, stilton jarlsberg, hillary, health, stairs, diazepam, epilepsy, huma, confused

A recently released photo of Hillary Clinton struggling to climb a small flight of steps is raising doubt about the candidate's health - let alone her name having anything to do with actual mountain climber Sir Edmund Hillary.

Forget Sherpas - Hillary apparently now needs an entire expeditionary force of Secret Service agents just to haul her uphill, while a mysteriously ever-present special aide stands ready to give her an emergency injection of the anti-seizure medication Diazepam in case she suddenly starts foaming at the mouth and keels over from another "short circuit."

While we don't know how serious her conditions are, we do know that we've never heard sufficiently believable explanations for her previous blackouts, the severe head injury which Bill Clinton said took her "six months of hard work" to come back from, the blood clot near her brain, her thick prism glasses, and Huma Abedin's emailed warning to colleagues to handle Hillary delicately as "she's often confused."

Hillary's physical health is a genuinely legitimate issue in this election, and voters need to demand answers. Oh sure, last year she released the results of her pap smear - so we can only imagine that whatever medical condition she's hiding inside her skull must be even more terrifying.

PUPDATE

Mom always dressed US funny on school picture day, too.

Ladybug is doing fine as she recovers from her surgery, and is already up and walking on her retooled leg (with careful supervision). We've erected a 6 x 6 fenced "safe space" for her in the den and she likes it just fine. Penny, the Official Dog of Hope n' Change, is also doing fine albeit showing signs of a little jealousy at all the attention being given to her junior in command.

But she's in for a special treat today: there's a newly-empty Clan MacGregor bottle which (once rinsed and with a marble dropped in) is her favorite toy in the universe.

40 comments:

Stevarooni said...

The cone of shame! With festive cactus pictures? :D

Mike aka Proof said...

Lucky for Penny that emptying a Clan MacGregor bottle is the favorite toy of Stilton himself!

Mike aka Proof said...

I guess I should have added that losing his marbles was optional!

Bobo the Hobo said...

Poor Ladybug. I hate when pets need medical care - they cannot understand the restrictions placed on them due to recovery requirements. Our best to Miss ‘Bug.

Looks like we’re going to have to rename the official presidential transport Stair Force One and bring The Association out of retirement every time Cho Bai Dung takes a plane trip ... because (await for it) everyone knows it’s Windy.

Anonymous said...

If you want to catch the ball, you must BECOME the ball, my friends....

Brie Camembert said...

I guess Mr Potato Head was just practicing for meeting Mr Xi in a few weeks.

Fish Out of Water said...

Love the tie-in to an episode concerning the late President Ford, who IMHO, should have had a term in his own right save for denying the howling mob (they who sired the current 'woke' generation?) their pound of fish, (HT Archie Bunker) i.e., Nixon. Sadly though I believe the tie-in - and humor- is lost on Gen Xer's and the millennials, who are turning out to be pretty humorless. Perhaps that is what true teaching is all about.

Rather than the vile, most unqualified, most unfit, most unworthy POTUS candidate since Henry Wallace's physical health, I've always wondered about this creature's mental health.

M. Mitchell Marmel said...

Sort of brings a whole new meaning to "There's A Ford In Your Future"...

Fish Out of Water said...

Why this is relevant here is it shows (at least to me) the other side is highly organized and motivated. And given that, 2022 may not the the retribution for the progs we are expecting.


Progressive Turnout Project seeks National Field Director


Location: Chicago, Illinois or remot

Position Summary:

Progressive Turnout Project (PTP) seeks applicants for the National Field Director role for the 2022 election cycle who are passionate about training, managing, and coaching staff engaged in direct voter contact. This position will be based out of our Chicago, IL, headquarters, with remote options available, and travel will be required to Field offices located in the Senate battleground states of Arizona, Georgia, Nevada, New Hampshire, North Carolina, Ohio, Pennsylvania, and Wisconsin.

The National Field Director is responsible for the implementation and management of Progressive Turnout Project’s Field program. This will include hiring and then directly working with State Field Directors on a daily basis, training and coaching Field staff, monitoring progress while holding staff accountable to goals, and troubleshooting miscellaneous issues as they arise. The supervisory scope of this position includes the day-to-day management of all Field staff, through a strong managerial structure, which will be anywhere from 50-200 staff per state, amounting to over 1500 paid staff.

The National Field Director is responsible for implementing and executing the planned Field program. Their focus will solely be on the ‘people’ side of this project, such as hiring, onboarding, training, managing, and coaching. This position does not include the strategic design of the Field program, which has been already completed by our Data department, or real time strategic decisions, which will be directly informed by data and decided on by executive leadership. The duties of this position are subject to modification in response to program or organizational needs.


There are no formal education requirements for this position. People of all backgrounds are encouraged to apply.

Responsibilities:


Hire State Field Directors for Arizona, Georgia, Nevada, New Hampshire, North Carolina, Ohio, Pennsylvania, and Wisconsin, and then guide them through hiring in-state staff, including District Leaders to head Field offices, and Field Representatives to conduct direct voter contact, totaling over 1500 Field staff

Coordinate training, comprehension checks, coaching, and accountability of all Field staff, including leading manager trainings with the aim of developing management skills among new and existing managers



Frequently travel to PTP Field offices throughout the United States for the purpose of gaining on-the-ground insight into program execution and providing additional guidance

The responsibilities listed are a general overview of the position and additional duties may be assigned

Qualifications (You will be a good fit if):

You have 5+ years of Field or equivalent organizing experience that has contributed to advanced knowledge within Field work and basic knowledge across all related political/campaign areas


Preferred Qualifications (Not Required):

You are fluent in Spanish

TrickyRicky said...

Good call on the inflatable collar versus the cone of shame. Our dogs always appreciate the difference.

Tell Ladybug we're laughing with her, not at her!

Jerryskids said...

Glad to hear Ladybug's knee is doing okay - how's Joe's knee doing?

mamafrog said...

Wonder when they're going to install an escalator and walker for ol' Slow Joe? It's a wonder they haven't shown more scenes of Kamala "helping" him out? Or maybe she's trying to stay hands off so as not to be blamed in the event of an "accident", maybe? And where's his wife helping him? She ain't no Eleanor, that's for sure.

Love the look you're getting from Ladybug, lol. Is that the drooly still haven't recovered from pain meds on?

rickn8or said...

mamafrog, I understand Kamala's going to have some sharp words for the guy she hired to put those guitar strings across the steps.

And to all, if you think your job sucks, contemplate the life of Hilary's gynecologist.

John the Econ said...

Over a generation ago, Chevy Chase built an entire career upon mocking Gerald Ford's stumbliness. Strangely enough, mainstream comics today still can't seem to find anything mock-worthy about Biden.

Perhaps even America's comics have come to the realization that Democrats electing this man as President is just plain sad.

Pupdate: Such a face! So glad she's on the mend. As long as they get plenty of love from their people, they cheer up.

Unrelated Observation: Mrs. Econ and I left our "neanderthal state" to travel to a neighboring neanderthal state to spend the weekend with close, life-long friends at a mutual friend's 70th birthday party. Most in attendance had either already had the Wuhan Flu, been long since been exposed to it and never got sick from it, or had the vaccination. For the better part of 48 hours, we did not see any masks, shook hands, hugged, visited, and lived like normal people used to for the first time in over a year. Some in attendance were from still-under-extreme-lockdown states like California, and to them it was as though they had escaped from East Germany in the 60s.

It was wonderful.

Gonzo'57 said...

It's apparently common place for a photog to snap a picture of Joe "Stumble Bum" Biden falling as he is going up a set of stairs but, the photog that snaps the picture of either Nancy "Bride of Skelator" Polisi or Kamala "Who do I Need to Blow to get ahead in This Job?" Harris pushing Joe down the stairs is going to be either very wealthy or very quickly dead.

Hate it when one of my two pups is sick or injured. Stilt, glad to see Bug is on the mend.

Had an ex wife once that tried to put my marbles in a jar, and on the shelf.

Colby Muenster said...

It was probably a revelation for Kamala. She likely had not (until now) contemplated pushing him UP the stairs.

But, in all seriousness, Ol' Joe has declined exponentially over the past few years. It's quite noticeable when you put video clips of 2021 Joe next to 2012 Joe, or even 2016 Joe. Yes, he is a geezer and geezers do shit like fall down, but I really wonder if his morning cornflakes aren't getting spiked.

@Fish,

Make me wonder what an applicant has to do to prove they are a "progressive." Wouldn't it be funny if the progs accidently hired a flaming conservative who went out to gather votes for "the enemy?"

@John the Econ,
Ain't it great!? Mrs. Muenster, four grandkids and I just finished a Myrtle Beach trip. It was almost like being back to normalcy. And school starts back full time in my little part of central NC on April 2. Huzzah! Wonder how the local school board slipped THAT past Governor Pooper???

Burner said...

Hell, that would be my favorite toy before it's rinsed and a marble dropped in.

Bobo said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Bobo said...

C’mon Biden climbed up to the jet,
C’mon Biden hadn’t reached the top yet.
When all a sudden he had a great fall,
And Kamala’s voice could be heard by all....

YES!!! FINALLY. TUMBLE DOWN - PLEASE!!

Gonzo'57 said...

Breaking Headline ( at least MSLSDN thinks it's a headline):

Colin Allred: Ex-NFL star Congressman bewildered by Jan 6 insurrection's 'rage and mob mentality'

He must be pretty damn stupid to "be bewildered by Jan 6 insurrection's rage and mob mentality" You filthy Dems have taken the ballot box away from us! That's why there was rage on Jan 6. And I suspect there is more coming.

Of course the whole story is just a "pat myself on the back and get my name in the news" piece. He says he took off his suite jacket and was ready to fight if he had to and how others told him they were glad he was there so they could hide behind him. What a big man you are, Mr. Colin. Nice piece of self aggrandizement. To bad you can't stand up and fight for the Constitution. If you would do that you would have multitudes standing ALONG SIDE of you to fight with you instead of cowering behind you like the bunch of pussified, momma's boys that most leftist seem to be these days. You and your cohorts in Congress are pathetic excuses for Americans.

There, screed over. I feel much better!

Dan said...

They'll need to roll a k-loader to AF1 in the future. Maybe palletize Joe to make it easier.

Mark McKinney said...

My wife and I wish Penny a quick recovery!

Fish Out of Water said...

@ Colby: You make a very good point. There are questions one can and cannot ask during the hiring process and making an applicant prove their "progressive" creds steps over the line IMHO.

Fish Out of Water said...

This is another reason why I continue to say the Gates of Hell have been flung wide open here. Mind you electric vehicles have a place, in large urban areas where the distances from A to B are relatively short. But that's all.

Two U.S. senators press Biden to set end date for ICE vehicle sales
California Democrats want U.S. to ban gasoline-powered vehicles by 2035

https://www.autonews.com/regulation-safety/two-us-senators-press-biden-set-end-date-ice-vehicle-sales?utm_source=daily&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=20210322&utm_content=article2-headline

NVRick said...

@Fish Out Of Water:
First of all, I am diametrically opposite of a progressive (or even a liberal).
If you believe that EVs are only good for short distances, then a trip from Pahrump, NV to New Berlin, WI is a very short distance.
We made that trip a couple of years ago in our Tesla Model 3, before the China Flu.
It was the most comfortable of the trips we made previously in Lincoln ICE cars.
On the interstates, Miranda (our name for the M3) did most of the driving. All I did was set the adaptive cruise control for about 7mph over the limit. Of course I still had to monitor what the car was doing, but I never really had to take over the controls.
Whenever it was time to charge the battery, it was usually about time to eat, and the car was always charged before we finished eating.
It is true that some manufacturers are delivering EVs with insufficient range, and most importantly, insufficient charging infrastructure. Ours has a maximum range of around 300 miles.
Now with China Joe at the levers, the cost of mp$ for us is becoming even better. When gas was at @$2.50 a gallon, our electric cost was about 1/3 to 1/2 of what our previous car cost for gas, and that was a Lincoln hybrid.
And when the urge strikes me, that 0 to 60 at around 4 seconds is really a kick in the @$$!
If you ever get a chance to drive one, you may really be surprised.

JustaJeepGuy said...


@NVRick,

Not all of us drive long distances restaurant-to-restaurant. Some of us don't stop at restaurants at all. A Tesla would never suffice for the long-distance driving I do. I don't like to stop for anything but gas before I have 600 miles behind me. Some day maybe I'll take the scenic route, but I generally need to GET where I'm going. But that's just me...

Marty in Iowa said...

SlowJoe actually inherited the wind as an excuse. King Barry blamed his ineptitude on "a headwind" for a good while. In fact it blew the "shovel ready jobs" clean away.

Gonzo'57 said...

NVR,


Electric vehicles are no doubt the future of transportation ( at least until hydrogen vehicles come of age) but the argument most of have against the EV is the government pushing the technology on us before the technology is completely up to speed. This push by the "New Green Deal" crowd will only result in unrealistic costs for vehicles and increased resistance to EV vehicles and less than competently designed cars. The major, and not major manufactures, already recognize the coming EV future and are adapting to it. Government interference in the process will only mess things up.

TrickyRicky said...

Where will the electricity come from when fossil fuels are outlawed?

https://www.manhattan-institute.org/green-energy-revolution-near-impossible

LenSatic said...

This guy was a 130# Akita. Look at his tail and you'll see that it's not very Akita-like. He fell asleep with his tail over a fire ant hill. At some point he pissed them off and they attacked. Ti keep him from chewing on it, we got him an inflatable collar because his head was so big that he couldn't get through a door with a cone. While Akitas rarely bark, if he would have with the cone on, it would have been deafening.

https://hosting.photobucket.com/albums/v38/Max-EPR/Mobile%20Uploads/2017-03/0318171108_zpslg3yantl.jpg?width=1920&height=1080&fit=bounds

Fish Out of Water said...

@NVRick: First of all, EVs do have one redeeming feature for their owners, most likely less maintenance costs (no oil changes, engine tune up, etc.) and an ICE vehicle.

But I also object to the government trying to socially engineer (again) by arbitrarily picking 'winners' where might we be now had the government in the last century decided Stanley Steamers were the way to go?

Given EVs and their limitations, if one accepts them and wishes to adjust their driving habits and lifestyle to fit. So be it. My poster child example are the trips we take to visit our son who is 500 miles plus away. Where he lives is not serviced by either long distance bus or trains. There is a puddle jumper option, but the flight are only one a day and not timed very conveniently .

Normally the trip takes anywhere from 11 to 12 hours. This includes one stop to refill the gas tank, leg stretching coffee etc., which takes at the most 30 minutes.

where I to own an EV, the range wouldn't even take me near where I go to refill my gasoline tank, so I would anticipate having to recharge at least twice just to get complete the trip. Given battery recharging times, I believe I would be looking at a total trip time of 13 to 14 hours, which is unacceptable.

Then there is the instance of me going to overnight visit relatives closer, about 130 or so miles away. Doable in an EV, but then there comes the sticky question of recharging. Do I ask, will they allow me to recharge using their household plug in -and thereby raise their utility bill- or do I go and search for a recharging station? Interesting social reverberations I see.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Stevarooni- We tried making a collar out of real cactus, but she didn't like it.

@Mike aka Proof- In nature, this is what we call a symbiotic relationship.

@Bobo the Hobo- I was totally going to go for an "everyone knows it's Windy" gag, but didn't know that everyone would get it. Then again, I think we're mostly seasoned citizens here at this point (grin).

@Anonymous- Heavy!

@Brie Camembert- Yeah, it's easier to throw yourself at his feet than just bow.

@Fish Out of Water- I really do think that humor is poison to woke minds. It calls for thought, analysis, and frequently a sense of irony and knowledge of history.

@M. Mitchell Marmel- Ford, fraud, whatever... (grin)

@Fish out of Water- Damn, I thought I had a good shot at the job until that "fluent in Spanish" line popped up.

@TrickyRicky- Last night, Bug slipped out of her inflatable collar (though no harm was done) so she may get the plastic cone of shame overnight for awhile. Which I hate, because when I put it on her she just stares at me in a terribly hurt way and it's hard for me to go to bed.

@Jerryskids- Joe's knee will be fine as long as he doesn't lick the stitches.

@mamafrog- I was wondering about an escalator, too, though am guessing that such a beast would be a pretty heavy thing for Air Force One to carry (I'm assuming, but don't know, that they carry the staircase with them). And Ladybug wasn't actually drooling. Even though she's still getting sedatives to keep her calm, she hasn't been "out of it" at all.

@rickn8or- I understand that Hilary had to dump her gynecologist and most straight to a spelunker.

@John the Econ- The whole "Biden has no qualities to make fun of" remind me of when the same line was trotted out about Obama. "There's nothing funny about perfection!" Obviously, those of us on this site beg to differ.

Ladybug is in good spirits and putting up with indignities without complaining.

I envy your unmasked social experience, though I'd still be too paranoid to do anything like that. The fact that we don't actually have anyone who WANTS to visit with us could also be a factor.

@Gonzo'57- I believe that Kamala went up the boarding stairs first, and only when reaching the top did she discover that there was a hole in her bag of ball-bearings.

John the Econ said...

EVs: California may try, but a national ban will never happen because capitalism!

If you just look back at relatively recent history, you'll see how such Progressive wet dreams have played out. In fact, they've usually worked in the exact opposite way the Progressives expected or would have liked.

For example, the CAFE standards implemented during the Carter years had by the end of the '80s basically outlawed the "station wagon" which had been the standard family hauler of the era since the 50s. So what happened then? Did American families all settle for cramming themselves into public transit or microcars as Progressives intended? No. During the '90s minivans and the SUV emerged as the must-have family haulers.

SUVs were largely the replacement for the station wagons that Progressivism effectively outlawed. (They had the added benefit of enraging Progressives even more than station wagons did because of their I'm an American and I'll go wherever I want to image) Of course, Progressives confused this trend with profligate American consumerism instead of a simple, practical desire for a larger vehicle.

So have you noticed that over the last decade SUVs have largely morphed into smaller "crossover" vehicles? So how are consumers who want more space reacting to this? They're moving up to crew-cab pickup trucks that offer even more passenger and cargo capacity. Again, Progressivism backfires.

My point is that at the end of the day, capitalism succeeds. All Progressivism has succeeded in doing to making these vehicles more expensive, which of course punishes the very people Progressivism professes to care the most about.

So for this reason I do not think that we will be seeing a national ban on ICE vehicles. Something better, or worse (for Progressives) will emerge.

EVs are optimal for repetitive daily commutes of a finite distance; a scenario where a user can confidently leave home with a full charge, drive it to work or errands during the day safely within its range capability, and return home to recharge again overnight. Nobody is going to be satisfied with a car that they must constantly monitor for range and then find a place to charge, and then wait a half-hour or longer for it to do so. Not when a conventional auto can for half-the-price travel 5 or 6 times the distance and can be refueled in 5 minutes.

Unrelated News: Looks like we have another mass shooting, this time in Boulder, Colorado. Except, this time do note a definitive difference from last week's event in Atlanta:

"(It is) premature to draw any conclusions (about motive) at this point in time," FBI special agent in charge Michael Schneider said.

Really? Last week it took literally minutes to determine that the cause was "white supremacy". So why is it premature this week? It might be because of the suspect's name and the fact that he's "lived most of his life in the United States".

Like with most shootings that do not support the Progressive narrative, expect both incidents to quickly disappear down the memory hole. Except, of course, for the victims.

John the Econ said...

Fish Out of Water said, "But I also object to the government trying to socially engineer (again) by arbitrarily picking 'winners' where might we be now had the government in the last century decided Stanley Steamers were the way to go?... My poster child example are the trips we take to visit our son who is 500 miles plus away. Where he lives is not serviced by either long distance bus or trains.

Aren't you getting the subtle hint from Progressivism? Your son has no business living somewhere so remote that is not serviced by bus or train. (It will be up to Mayor Pete to decide if his domicile is worthy of more or less public access) He should be relocated into a densely-pack urban center that is more ecologically sound and where people can be more completely controlled.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Colby Muenster- Joe is obviously in decline. It will be interesting to see how he performs in his first (!) press event since being "elected."

@Burner- Mine too!

@Bobo- Can we call that poem "Humpty Dumbass?"

@Gonzo'57- There was, and is, plenty to be angry about relating to the farce that was passed off as a fair election. That being said, I still don't see how the events of January 6 were any worse (or even as bad) as the multitude of antifa/BLM riots (causing billions in damage) over the summer.

@Dan- I'd like to see them put a rescue harness on him, like a water rescue, and then winch him aboard.

@Mark McKinny- Technically Penny is fine (outside of feeling a bit neglected) so I'll pass your good wishes on to Ladybug!

@Fish Out of Water- To play Devil's advocate, even though it would be wrong to bring up political ideology in a job interview, in today's world it might head off a lot of subsequent grief on the job. Personally, I wouldn't want to get hired by an employer that wants me to be "woke."

Regarding electric vehicles, I agree with you - they have their place, but that isn't "everyplace."

@NVRick- Sounds like a fun drive! I think I'm too much of a dinosaur to buy an electric car, but I'd like to experience one sometime.

@JustaJeepGuy- My long-distance driving days are behind me. I fall into a coma if I'm behind the wheel longer than an hour.

@Marty in Iowa- You're right!

@Gonzo'57- Great points. The government pushing electric vehicles before the technology is robust enough means that at the present those cars are simply burning taxpayer dollars instead of gasoline. Although in fairness, Progressives consider that the MOST endlessly renewable resource.

@TrickyRicky- There you go, following science again.

@LenSatic- AWwwww. And a fire ant attack from behind?! That's just evil.

@Fish Out of Water- You bring up interesting points about EVs, especially what the social protocol should be for recharging at someone else's home. Hmm.

M. Mitchell Marmel said...

@Stilton:

- Stairs: I think they keep a certain number of 'em prepositioned in CONUS. If there's a trip going to somewhere without, the advance crew (traveling in a C-5 or the like ahead of time) carries one with ahead of AF1.

-EVs: Just as the prudent motorist carries jumper cables with, the prudent EV operator will carry a charging cable with.

@John: Gee, I'm amazed they gave the Colorado shooter's name and ID. One would think that would be memory-holed immediately. I think, however, you can take three guesses as to motive...and the first two don't count. :P

Fish Out of Water said...

@John the Econ: Your analysis is correct. Granted when the initial CAFE standards were enacted, excluding the imports, the average passenger vehicle was too, big, too heavy and woefully fuel inefficient.

But like every government agency, law or program, those who run it see they need to do something to justify the existence. Hence the ratchetting up of CAFE until now the even family sedan is likely to disappear from the fleet. Thanks to CAFE they simply no longer have the utility an American family needs.

CAFE needs to go away. Detroit will never again build the monsters they once did and OPEC has learned the folly of weaponizing oil.

rickn8or said...

Does the ban on ICE include those behemoths that deliver everything on the store shelves?

How much battery does it take to move 80,000# 400 miles?

Stoneager. said...

I like good news. Thank you Lady Bug.

Anonymous said...

Thrice your feet with betray thee...ya moron...