Wednesday, October 18, 2017

Toe The Lyin'

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Hillary Clinton recently had to cancel a series of interviews after tragically breaking a big toe, which forced her Secret Service detail to immediately call for a big toe truck. Thank you, you've been a beautiful audience, and don't forget to tip your waiters.

No, no - she claims that she was walking backwards down a flight of stairs while wearing high heels and carrying a cup of coffee, which we find entirely believable except for the part where she leaves out being roaring drunk and kicking a staff member.

Or maybe she broke her toe while trying to pull her foot out of her mouth after promising to return Harvey Weinstein's financial contributions, then saying "but there's no one to return them to," then saying "but I'll definitely give the money to charity," after which she declared that Weinstein gave the money to the Clinton Foundation which already is a charity, so she'll keep his filthy, bodily-fluid stained cash after all.

However her alleged injury happened, we'll just note that the woman seems to fall and hurt herself a lot for someone who's not in a 12-step program.


Military traitor (and Obama-administration hero) Bowe Bergdahl has quietly taken a guilty plea for desertion, claiming that he couldn't get a fair trial in Trump's America.

In all the coverage (ie, not much) we're hearing about Bergdahl, people seem to be missing the critical context of what was happening at the time of the infamous Gitmo prisoner swap: Obama was being roasted for the criminal (and often fatal) mistreatment of veterans by the VA, and Bergdahl's "rescue" was Barry's way of trying to get off the hook by showing he'd "leave no man behind."

To that end, we're revisiting what we wrote about the Bergdahl incident at the time...

June 2, 2014 - Another Big Effing Deal

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(Excerpt) the POW, Sgt. Bowe Bergdahl, may actually have been a military deserter at the time he was captured (or conscripted) by the enemy - and at the very least was a man who held a singularly low opinion of the United States even before his alleged capture.  According to Bergdahl, our nation is "the most conceited country in the world" and "I am ashamed to be an American. And the title of US soldier is just the lie of fools. I am sorry for everything. The horror that is America is disgusting.”

Sentiments which, of course, match those of his commander in chief - the Great Liberator of Guantanamo Bay.

June 4, 2014 - Let's Fake A Deal

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Bowe Bergdahl's father offers Islamic victory prayer in Rose Garden

 (Excerpt) Susan "I'll Say Anything" Rice made the rounds of news shows claiming that Sgt. Bergdahl served "with honor and distinction," which doesn't seem to quite square with the impression given by every other soldier who served with him. Then again, perhaps Ms. Rice has simply been misinformed by a Youtube video.

Meanwhile, James Clapper, then director of National Intelligence, said in 2012 that the "Gitmo Five" were unquestionably too dangerous to release...

June 6, 2014 - Suit First, Ask Questions Later

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(Excerpt) The White House is now asserting that anyone who voluntarily puts on the uniform of the United States has accomplished all that is necessary to be given the "served with honor and distinction" label to wear a lifetime, no matter what circumstances occur later.

And Hope n' Change can't help but wonder: will Nidal Hassan continue to rot in jail here in the United States, or will his service with "honor and distinction" allow him to be bundled with the Blind Sheikh, Khalid Shaikh Mohammed, and other jihadists for Barry's next prisoner swap?

DOCTORING (June 6, 2014)

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So why did the White House have to act super-duper fast to secure the Bergdahl-Terrorists swap without meeting the legal 30-day requirement to inform Congress? Supposedly, it was because they compared two videos (allegedly Charlie the Unicorn, and This Too Shall Pass) and came to the stunning conclusion that Bergdahl's health was in rapid decline and immediate action was called for.

Oddly, they came to this conclusion in December, 2013 - but didn't do anything about it until, by wild coincidence, the VA scandal broke wide open and B. Hussein desperately needed to make a highly-visible gesture of caring about members of the military.

Granted, it seems that it's the Taliban's military that got the best of the deal - but at least Barry cares. And gosh, Bergdahl was really, really, really sick and close to dying. Unless he was erroneously diagnosed (from watching a video, no less) by the same nitwits who declared that the Lockerbie bomber, who killed 259 people on Pan Am Flight 203, was only days away from dying and deserved to be released from prison on humanitarian grounds (which Barry agreed to).

Like the "Gitmo 5," he returned to his homeland and a hero's welcome...and then lived another 3 years, much to the horror of the hundreds of families decimated by his act of terror.

But all of this may be overthinking the issue. B. Hussein doesn't actually care about Bergdahl, Bergdahl's health, or the health of any member of our armed forces. He does care about his poll numbers and his popularity in the Muslim world - and he thought this obscene prisoner swap would help him in both areas.

He couldn't possibly be more wrong.


Igor said...

We need to hammer home the "overlooked" fact that this miserable piece of donkey excrement's freedom was exchanged for the freedom of 5 other pieces of Donkey excrement.
And The One should have been strung up by his 'nads.

Nah. I'm not pissed. No, really...

Velveeta Processed Cheese Food said...

As I heard it, Hillary's yarn is that she was RUNNING down the steps, in HIGH HEELS, carrying a cup of coffee, and looked backward, got a heel hooked somehow and broke a toe, of all things. All of which brings to mind the photos from the campaign, showing her completely unable to mount a stairs without being without basically being carried up by a goon on each side. In my unfortunately large experience with psychopaths, they tell the most outrageous, obvious lies and simply expect to be believed. I don't think they're capable of grasping that people eventually get onto them.

I can't even begin to describe my outrage over the whole Bergdahl travesty. Your comments at the time really bring the whole thing back into focus.

Anonymous said...

By your definition of psychopaths telling unbelievable lies, that includes most of the government. You are spot on.

james daily said...

Hillary wearing her stilettos and leather carrying a whip. What a god awful picture. Yea, she was definitely lying about this. It is very hard to break a toe while wearing any type of shoe but never mind, as no one in the continental believes her. Besides if she was wearing high heels, it's the first time in over 20 years. She wears those little squatty heel shoes.
On the former Sargent, I have no idea why they didn't let them keep him since he ran away. Had they offered him back gratis, we should have refused. This has never passed the smell test. It would have been possible for our guys to kill the traitor during an engagement.

REM1875 said...

Apparently injuring a cloven hoof is a lot more serious than most of us realize .......

Fish Out of Water said...

One, I am still amazed and infuriated that the avaricious, pathological, serial liar and venal grifter is still considered relevant and allows to spew her poison to undermine as much as she can, President Trump.

As for the now convicted deserter and his parents, you've dealt with the devil, now live with it.

REM1875 said...

I got a feeling birddog will continue to find out his dad was wrong -maybe why he isn't talking with him......'dad' need's to go against the wall first .....

Bobo the Hobo said...

My high school physics education disputes Hillary's story - t'aint possible, Mcgee.

I'm still waiting to hear from Eddie Slovik before I comment on Bowe Bergdhal.

TrickyRicky said...

@REM1875- Cloven it!

(Excerpt) The White House is now asserting that anyone who voluntarily puts on the uniform of the United States has accomplished all that is necessary to be given the "served with honor and distinction" label to wear a lifetime, no matter what circumstances occur later.

Reminds me of a certain mendacious senator from Arizona.

Emmentaler "INTO THE COOL-LAH!" Limburger said...

@Igor: What TRULY needs to be at the fore are those brave souls who died while trying to find this piece of shit when he deserted. In my book, this makes him guilty of wrongful deaths, if not flat out homicide.

@REM1875 you win the internet today. You will receive the cleaning bill for the nose-spewed coffee shortly...

The truth of the matter is that this toe breakage has been on the schedule ever since she lost the election. Ordinarily, disappointing Soros carries a much, much higher cost, but good ol' George made an exception for Hillary since she's always been such a good little puppet, er, I mean: soldier...

Geoff King said...

"walking backwards down a flight of stairs while wearing high heels and carrying a cup of coffee".
More likely crawling backwards down a flight of stairs while wearing orthopedic shoes and carrying a fifth of vodka.
Anything that lying bitch says doesn't amount to a Hillary of beans.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Igor- Absolutely. I was about to say "if there's a more direct act of treason by a president, I can't think of it" but then I remembered a generous handful of other things Barry did. And the damage he did still lingers...

@Velveeta Processed Cheese Food- I think you've got the details of Hillary's alleged "accident" correct; I misspoke saying she was actually running backwards and didn't bother to check because I didn't see the point in getting every jot and tittle of a lie correct. And yes, she's clearly a pathological liar.

I'm still livid about the whole Bergdahl snafu, and really felt the need to go back to what was happening at the time and what was already known. I didn't mention those who were injured or killed looking for this POS because I didn't know it at the time. How the hell someone can get a plea deal that doesn't involve a firing squad after that is a mystery to me.

@Anonymous- Hillary definitely has plenty of company in the lying department. Washington is pretty much where truth goes to die.

@James Daily- I'm pretty sure the Secret Service doesn't let Hillary wear high heels, because they can be dangerous when she throws them at Bill.

Regarding Bergdahl, I agree we shouldn't have taken him back under ANY circumstances - but then, the point wasn't so much getting him back as it was releasing five terrorists back onto the battlefield.

@REM1875- Now THAT, my friend, is funny!

@Fish Out of Water- Hillary will remain mainstream media gold as long as she cares to stay in the spotlight. Unless Julian Assange really DOES have some major dirt on her.

@REM1875- The whole scene in the White House rose garden with Bergdahl's father was surreal. There's definitely something wrong with the whole family.

@Bobo the Hobo- How appropriate you mention "McGee," as Hillary is clearly a Fibber. (Raise your hand if you got that joke. Hmm- not many).

And I agree that Bergdahl's case should have been handled the way Slovik's was.

@Thomas Beechler- There's plenty of guilt to go around in this mess. So much deceit and lying.

@TrickyRicky- You make a good point.

@Emmentaler "INTO THE COOL-LAH" Limburger- Where is the outcry for those who lost their lives because of this scumbag? I think Bergdahl was afraid he WOULD get a "fair trial" under Trump, because we all know how a fair trial should have turned out.

And it does seem like Hillary has injuries pop up on a regular and opportune basis.

@Geoff King- Amen.

rickn8or said...

I'm going to go out on a limb here and state that her broken toe resulted from an enraged drunk-on-her-ass Hillary kicking an immovable object. And an orthopedic boot is the treatment for a broken toe??

You can say what you like about Eddie Slovik, but at least he stayed on the Allied side of the lines.

Stinking Bishop said...

My reaction to Hillary's explanation.

John the Econ said...

I believe that Hillary's argument is that the Weinstein money has already been spent, so she can't give it back. Apparently cash in the Clinton world isn't the least bit fungible.

In cases like this, I apply what I call the "IRS Test", where I question as to whether the IRS would accept that argument as an excuse. For example, if the IRS says that I haven't paid enough taxes on my income and I tell the IRS "Oh, too bad, but I already spent that money.", does the IRS say "Oh, okay. Forget about it.", or do they say "Pay up in 30 days or go to jail"?

Very little of what the Clintons do would pass any IRS test that would apply to you or I.

Speaking of Hillary: It's telling that the big news story on Hillary is about a broken toe instead of this:

FBI uncovered Russian bribery plot before Obama administration approved controversial nuclear deal with Moscow

Before the Obama administration approved a controversial deal in 2010 giving Moscow control of a large swath of American uranium, the FBI had gathered substantial evidence that Russian nuclear industry officials were engaged in bribery, kickbacks, extortion and money laundering designed to grow Vladimir Putin’s atomic energy business inside the United States, according to government documents and interviews... They also obtained an eyewitness account — backed by documents — indicating Russian nuclear officials had routed millions of dollars to the U.S. designed to benefit former President Bill Clinton’s charitable foundation during the time Secretary of State Hillary Clinton served on a government body that provided a favorable decision to Moscow, sources told The Hill.

Just more proof for what we've all known for years, that Putin didn't to get Trump elected in order to have a pliant friend in the White House; he already owned one. It's easier to understand Hillary's sacrificing a toe instead of going in front of not-as-friendly-as-they-used-to-be journalists expecting that questions about issues more embarrassing than Harvey's checks might pop up.

Speaking of "Russian Interference": If I understand the narrative correctly, Russian bots buying $100,000 worth of Facebook ads were more effective than the $2,500,000,000 that Hillary spent?

If that's really the case, I'd have voted for the Russians. They're far more effective with taxpayer dollars than either the Democrats or Republicans.

Bowe Bergdahl: If I was Bowe Bergdahl, I'd be totally pissed, having gone from the hero who served with honor and distinction to headed for hard labor at Leavenworth. If he had only demanded a sex change, he would have received an Obama pardon and would now be on the ivy league lecture circuit with Chelsea Manning.

Also, don't miss the irony that Bowe probably was receiving better medical care in from the Taliban than he would have at the VA, which is probably the only reason why he didn't go the transgender route.

Colby Muenster said...

I think Geoff King's and rickn8or's broken toe explanations are way more feasible than the whole "walking backwards downstairs wearing high heels and holding coffee" thing. Or maybe she was in her money bin counting her ill-gotten lucre and dropped a gold bar on her toe. Or maybe she threw a vase at Bill and it bounced off his head and hit her toe?

I swear this woman must think we are all gullible beyond description. Nope Shrillary, only your followers are that gullible.

We should not be determining Bergdahl's fate. I say gather all the survivors of those whose deaths were caused by the five rag heads O'Liar let go, and let them decide how Bergdahl should spend the rest of his (hopefully few) days.

I coffee spewed the first time I saw your "Willie Nelson's ball sack" cartoon. Same effect years later! You are truly gifted!

Elbarto said...

Whether or not Obama should have traded the Taliban commanders for Bergdahl is matter for debate. Although he deserted, he was still an American soldier who was being held prisoner. What really galled me was President Obama hosting Bergdahl's parents in the White House rose garden, the sort of honor is usually reserved for the parents of a soldier who is being awarded the Medal of Honor (usually posthumously), not someone who deserted in the face of the enemy. It was disgusting.

NVRick said...

Bergdahl may regret that he won't get the death penalty. A firing squad would give him a nice, clean quick exit.
Although convicted and sentenced to the stockade, most servicemen still maintain a modicum of patriotism. I wonder how Bergdahl will be greeted on arrival and set out in the general population.
Even most convicts retain a sense of what is right and wrong.
Jeffrey Dahmer found that out the hard way.

Snark said...

As long as Shrillary can find something - anything - to keep her in the spotlight, the more obvious her mental frailty becomes to even the dimocrats. She is totally irrelevant and she can't stand it; her desperate, pathetic pleas for attention reveal both her toxic personality and how lacking her party is in any leadership. Hopefully she will keep rising up from her stupors to keep the rest of the liberals off balance. They're already unbalanced as it is.

Send Bergdahl to Afghanistan one-way. Drop him off with a pet pig. He can enjoy his friends for the rest of his miserable life.

the Snark

Unknown said...

Wow, The big 0 and his administration was sure a target rich environment... Thanks for the great reminders...


Mark Trahan said...

"[S]he claims that she was walking backwards down a flight of stairs while wearing high heels and carrying a cup of coffee"

Is that some new kind of drinking game?

Regnad Kcin said...

Strap Bergdahl over a saw horse facing Mecca with his wrists and ankles cuffed together. Then, insert a lightly lubed cattle prod up his bunghole with the power switch duct-taped in the "on" position. Turn off the lights and lock the door. It's Miller Time !!

Emmentaler "The Excusinator" Limburger said...

@John, John, John! Of COURSE there's evidence of a bribery plot around and about the sale of 20% of our Uranium to the Russians! It was a STING operation, after all! Haha! The Clintons, Øbama, Comey, Mueller, Holder, Lynch, et al couldn't POSSIBLY have been selling out our country while in offce! Heheh! It was ALL a plot to catch the Russians and their collaborators (collabotraitors?)! Like Fast & Furious! Ha! And it simply went off the rails much as Fast & Furious did! No greed! No nefarious, traitorous intent! Really!

At least, that's what I what I expect to hear out of their collective mouth as this gets worse and worse for them...

@jpb: Spot on - but Øbama had a way of sullying everything respectable about that office...

John the Econ said...

I hear that Florida has called a "state of emergency" over Richard Spencer giving a speech today, which is exactly the kind of hyperventilation that the asshats love to #feedthehate machine. No doubt the usual suspects are setting up for a replay of the Chancellorsville circus. Now that the Weinstein story has run its course, (and is getting a bit too close to Democrats for their comfort, eh Cyrus Vance Jr.?) the MSM complex needs a new outrage to keep attention off of the ugly details now emerging of the reality of Russia, the Clintons, Obama, Comey, Mueller, Holder, Lynch, Powers, etc.

John the Econ said...

Don't know how "Charlottesville" became "Chancellorsville", (where the hell is that?) other than sometimes my autocorrect goes fascist.

MAJ Arkay said...

"I'm still livid about the whole Bergdahl snafu, and really felt the need to go back to what was happening at the time and what was already known. I didn't mention those who were injured or killed looking for this POS because I didn't know it at the time. How the hell someone can get a plea deal that doesn't involve a firing squad after that is a mystery to me."

The charges were one count of Article 85, desertion with intent to shirk important or hazardous duty, and one count of Article 99, misbehavior before the enemy by endangering the safety of a command, unit or place.

Article 85: Any member of the armed forces who–
(1) without authority goes or remains absent from his unit, organization, or place of duty with intent to remain away therefrom permanently;
(2) quits his unit, organization, or place of duty with intent to avoid hazardous duty or to shirk important service; or
(3) without being regularly separated from one of the armed forces enlists or accepts an appointment in the same or another on of the armed forces without fully disclosing the fact that he has not been regularly separated, or enters any foreign armed service except when authorized by the United States; is guilty of desertion.
(b) Any commissioned officer of the armed forces who, after tender of his resignation and before notice of its acceptance, quits his post or proper duties without leave and with intent to remain away therefrom permanently is guilty of desertion.
(c) Any person found guilty of desertion or attempt to desert shall be punished, if the offense is committed in time of war, by death or such other punishment as a court-martial may direct, but if the desertion or attempt to desert occurs at any other time, by such punishment, other than death, as a court-martial may direct.

Article 99: Any person subject to this chapter who before or in the presence of the enemy–
(1) runs away;
(2) shamefully abandons, surrenders, or delivers up any command, unit, place, or military property which it is his duty to defend;
(3) through disobedience, neglect, or intentional misconduct endangers the safety of any such command, unit, place, or military property;
(4) casts away his arms or ammunition;
(5) is guilty of cowardly conduct;
(6) quits his place of duty to plunder or pillage;
(7) causes false alarms in any command, unit, or place under control of the armed forces;
(8) willfully fails to do his utmost to encounter, engage, capture, or destroy any enemy troops, combatants, vessels, aircraft, or any other thing, which it is his duty so to encounter, engage, capture, or destroy; or
(9) does not afford all practicable relief and assistance to any troops, combatants, vessels, or aircraft of the armed forces belonging to the United States or their allies when engaged in battle;
shall be punished by death or such punishment as a court-martial may direct.

It appears, however, that death was taken off the table. We don't know the circumstances as to why, but that does seem to be causing a serious amount of heartburn in the Army. It might be that Bergdahl decided to plead out to make sure he could avoid the maximum penalty. We just don't know.

And if he had gotten the death penalty, the military would use lethal injection, not a firing squad.

Mark Matis said...

Cankles only wears stilettos and uses that whip when she's with her Huma, James Daily. And right now Huma is occupied by Harvey's ho. Or vice versa...

John the Econ said...

I think I'm pretty sure who is going to be featured in tomorrow's cartoon. I mean, no artwork required.

George said...


John the Econ said...

Dang, I was wrong.