|Really, John? We're all ears.
Kerry, it should be noted, was Obama's lead negotiator in striking a "get-tough" nuclear deal with Iran which still guaranteed that the terrorist nation could build nukes, gave Iran the right to inspect its own facilities for any (ahem) treaty violations, and got airline tickets upgraded from coach to first class for the giant pallets of cash Obama sent in the dead of night.
And since Iran is very much in the news, it's worth remembering just WHY Iran wanted that $1.7 billion in cash instead of as an electronic transaction: because cash purchases can't be traced. Which is fairly important if you're planning to fund terror activities around the world, do "off the books" nuclear enrichment, or buy missiles to fire at U.S. military bases and civilian passenger jets.
But Kerry's "no whiff of scandal" claim isn't the only thing that stinks in the news...
Actress and entrepreneur Gwyneth Paltrow is selling candles called "This Smells Like My Vagina." Or we should say she was selling them, because the first run of $75 candles has already sold out, presumably to pervy customers who were no longer satisfied with their "This Smells Like Canned Cat Food" candles.
This presumably opens the door for a flood of other self-scentered liberal celebrity products: Robert De Niro's "This Smells Like My Feet" platform shoes, Joe Biden's "This Smells Like My Female Constituents" shampoo, Greta Thunberg's "This Smells Like My Stolen Childhood" lighter fluid, Stephen Colbert's "This Smells Like the Wax in My Tiny Deformed Ear" cotton swabs, Joy Behar's "This Smells Like My Loud, Sour Farts" air defreshener and, of course, Bill Clinton's "This Smells Like My Intern" cigars.
BONUS: I PUT A SMELL ON YOU
We often do multiple variations on a cartoon and then go with what we hope is the funniest one. Still, we have a fondness for today's runner-up...