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Friday, May 8, 2020

Buy Dumb Supporter

Some years ago in this space, we tried to institute "Good News Friday" with only positive stories. The world, however, didn't get the memo and we quickly discarded the idea when "good news" failed to materialize on a weekly basis.

And such is the case again this week (to put it mildly), which is why we're wrapping things up with yet another visit to the yellowing, 30-year old pages of the Spensive Gifts catalog. Happy browsing!

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spensive gifts

spensive gifts
BREAKING NEWS: OUT LIKE FLYNN

It turns out that there IS good news to report: the Justice Department has dropped its criminal case against General Michael Flynn! We only hope that this will initiate the aggressive investigation and prosecution of those who framed and defamed Flynn in a brazen attempt to overthrow the Presidency.

It's criminal - literally - how long this smear campaign has been going on and how far it's reached. As evidenced by this visit to the vault from June, 2017...

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Despite stratospheric levels of hype, yesterday's laughably named "intelligence hearing" testimony by disgraced former FBI Director James Comey wasn't so much "shock and awe" as "Rorschach" and "Aw, shut the Hell up."

We cite Rorschach because, as is the case with other meaningless ink blots, everyone interpreted Comey's remarks however they wanted: the Right sees Trump as completely exonerated, and the Left believes they heard so much dirt that they can't decide whether to take the time to impeach the President or simply march on the White House with pitchforks and torches and burn the building down while he's still inside.

The reality, as nearly as we can tell, is that Trump didn't do anything legally wrong when talking to Comey about Mike Flynn and the Russian investigation. But in true snowflake-style, Comey is now interpreting his own bizarre feelings and fantasies related to that conversation as proof of wrongdoing.

Comey, who is dishonest and Machiavellian but no fool, is fully aware that Trump did nothing to obstruct justice - but he was spinning like a Dervish trying to imply otherwise. Which makes it fortunate that he no longer runs the Federal Bureau of Implication.

Comey did occasionally share interesting truths, including his concern that former DOJ head Loretta Lynch had been compromised during her meeting with Bill Clinton on an airport tarmac. He additionally confirmed that Lynch asked him (which in Comey's mind is apparently a direct order) to refer to Hillary's criminal investigation as a "matter" - which Comey subsequently did, even though he freely admits that it was a lie designed only to help Hillary's image during election season.

All in all, his testimony showed only that Trump can be ham-handedly (but legally) direct when expressing his thoughts...and that Comey (among others associated with Obama and Clinton) has genuinely made a practice of obstructing justice by attempting to interpret the hints, nuances, and implied desires of his political masters.

Because a nod is as good as a wink when justice isn't intended to be blind.

Wednesday, May 6, 2020

We Pause For A Brief Word From Our Ulcer

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Cartoon by Stilton's Dad!
We're more or less taking the day off because, somehow, ever since The Great Plague of 2020 hit, there never seems to be enough hours in the day to get everything done. Or, all too often, anything done. Ergo, the whole "juggling chainsaws" thing - although we never need much of an excuse to share a cartoon by Stilton's father.

Of course, there's plenty to talk about in the comments section: the "winding down" of the White House Coronavirus Task Force (just a bit premature in our estimation), the latest information about how the FBI totally boned General Michael Flynn as part of their coup attempt against Trump, and Biden's declaration that he plans to choose a female VP candidate based solely on a "sniff test."

For anyone who doesn't know how to get to the comments section, just click on the title of the day's post and share your thoughts. See you there!

Monday, May 4, 2020

Nyuk, Nyuk - Who's There?

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It's now all but certain that the SARS-CoV-2 virus which causes COVID-19 did not originate in nature, but rather escaped from a laboratory doing nightmarishly dangerous experiments in Wuhan (Chinese for "Whoops!").

If you want the whole story (and you should!), we recommend going to this link for a detailed, accurate, and fascinating 40-minute presentation about how this happened and why it's almost impossible that the civilization-busting virus originated anywhere else.

In the report, you'll learn about the Wuhan lab's experiments designed to produce "gain of function" in bat coronaviruses. Which is to say, enhancing the qualities they already have (infectivity and lethality) and giving them new qualities they didn't previously have (jumping to humans). This is the well-documented research the lab was doing at exactly the same time SARS-CoV-2, by wild coincidence, allegedly developed spontaneously all by itself in a way never previously seen in nature, in a wet market just 300 yards from the lab's front door. Or more likely, the back door.

Granted, this new information doesn't really change much other than to confirm that the Chinese government, with their secrecy and lies, screwed the world in much the same way a toothless hillbilly psycho corn-holed a squealing Ned Beatty in "Deliverance." And of course, the information also gives us a new empathy for all of those angry, torch-wielding peasants in Frankenstein movies who knew that there were some things Man was not meant to tamper with.

But this is our reality now and, as our good friend Johnny Optimism reminds us, life goes on...

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FROM THE VAULT (BY POPULAR REQUEST)...